Turn 7Anna has officially seen it all: Milk geysers, pointy-eared mutants, mutants who are able to disguise as completely human, mutant-buildings with spider legs controlled by a said disguised mutant. Seeing the said mutant-building abomination, she decided to use a pretty old but well-working tactic: Running away, then setting up a trap!
Run away from the mutant-building, hopefully giving me a time to set up a trap.
Set up a frag mine trap to blow some of the mutant's legs off, then finish the wounded mutant-buildings with an incendiary grenade right into the door!
If I'll have no time to set up a trap (the spider-hut manages to keep with me in speed, for example), pull out an Anti-Material Rifle and shoot an incendiary bullet into Margaret's chest!
EDIT: Editing the actions and adding the new ones as well.
5 to escape, 6+2 vs 1 to ambush hut, 2 for Margaret's escape.You vanish into the swamp in an instant, taking occasional potshots at the hut to let it know where to go. After a merry chase, the hut whirls and scrabbles into a clearing. You're standing out in the open with a grin and a rifle at the ready. Margaret snarls at the spider-hut to tear you open and save the heart. In compliance, the house mutant rushes forward. It's forelegs rise to finish you off, but where a mundane mutant might roar there is only the cacophony of frag mines beeping. A dozen thudding blasts shred the hut and send it sliding toward you as Margaret clings to the doorframe. A final incendiary grenade through the door ends it. The hut's wreckage comes to a halt as Margaret falls face forward into the mud. She gags and coughs on the smoke before looking up at you. "Perhaps...perhaps we should call it a draw, yes?"
Nod at the king and gallop towards the Lord Saxon's Castle.
3You make it to the castle after a quick ride. The castle itself is atop a large hill, and a gargoyle is perched ominously over the front gate. Somehow you suspect it isn't a mere statue.
use my superior grip to get on top of their head and back, then begin biting at their arms to render the troll less dangerous.
1 vs 4-1You try to get atop the troll and cripple it, but it manages to get good leverage on you from there. It lifts you up and tosses you to the side. You clamber about for a moment and manage to get back on your feet as the troll waves its club.
I will find an empty milk bottle and as quitely and sneaky as possible trade out the bottles. If he awakes at anytime during this, I tell him there has been a recall on milk in this region because of mad cow disease.
3,4You sneak up and swap out the bottles. When you do this, the mangy dog growls and wakes its master. He's initially furious, but buys your explanation about the mad cow disease and thanks you for removing the tainted milk. You have acquired a milk bottle.
YOU WIN THE GAME!!!What do you do next?
Name: Vaarsuvius
Description: Typical D&D High Elf. Pointed ears, violet hair. Is a 16th level wizard. Is wearing a red wizard's robe.
Why do you want milk? So that I may use it to attain ULTIMATE COSMIC POWER!
Casts Locate Object while focusing on a milk bottle, gaining knowledge of the location of the closest milk bottle.
4You bring your prodigious arcane will to bear on finding the beverage you seek. Initially, you can't sense any bottles within 1040 feet of your location. You are once again confronted with an annoying mental reminder that you can't just cast Teleport to visit a larger town. However, you soon sense a bottle has entered the radius! It's currently about three feet off the ground in front of the local inn, 85 feet from your current location.
That reminds me that some species of spiders produce milk. I will create some anti-toxin in preparation for my quest for spiders.
2You decide to go milk some spiders. You'll need to go after a giant spider if you want to get a reasonable amount of milk without a prohibitive amount of time and effort. You try mixing up some giant spider antivenom, but the resulting mixure curdles with a foul smoke. This potion will be of no use, aside from perhaps inducing nonmagical feelings of nausea.
BITE MY FIST TO STIFLE A MANIACAL CACKLE FROM ALL THE EXCITEMENT.
THEN BEGIN ATTEMPTING TO START IT UP. USE THE POWER OF SCIENCE... MAD SCIENCE.
4As you inspect the controls, you think to yourself "If I were dangerously obsessed with machines instead of reviving the dead, where would I put the activation button?" You push a promising looking button with this in mind. The machine hisses and snaps to life and jets of steam vent from tubes in the back. A steering wheel folds out to greet you. You fail to suppress a small cackle.
"YOU STAND BEFORE THE GREAT GERALD G. GOATSBY, HOLY-MAN. YOU'VE DESTROYED MY GREATEST PROJECT TO DATE. WHAT SAY YOU IN YOUR DEFENCE?"
Aggressively seize the priest by his throat. Be ready to weave some serious explosive magic if he tries anything. Tell my sneks to watch him.
1 vs 3 for you attacking Harold, 1 vs 6 for snakes.Stab Goatsby with my crucifix as he is a crazed individual that's going around summoning demons.
1 vs 1Harold and Goatsby lunge at each other with a sharpened crucifix and glowing red magic spells respectively. Neither was quite ready for a melee fight just yet, apparently. They mostly just flail around at each other for a bit. However, a serpent approaches to aid its master and gets an accidental crucifix stab to the chest for its trouble. The serpent recoils with acidic milk blood marring the ground beneath it.
You don’t want to get thrown, you piss off. Got it?
If he doesn’t run away, pummel him into submission or death, whichever comes first.
1 vs 3-1(It was at this point that I got sick of all these 1's and started rolling a physical D6 for the rest of the actions this turn. This is less meaningful from you people's perspective, since I rearranged the actions. But to be clear, it was the sixth 1.)
Heal thyself(use powers to heal my arm.)
My rolls have been really crappy.
3+1 for Grail's assist.Cast a heal miracle and cure the wounds of me and my new allies.
4Get him while he's down!
4 vs 5-1MIGHTY!!!!
2-1 vs 6 against Aaron.Adam steps away from the fight to try and replace his severed arm. Initially, the limb comes out twisted and demonic, but then Adam's attention is drawn to the somehow regal-looking mug on the ground. The Grail Mug glows with its own light and reforms Adam's arm into a healthy state while also fixing its own damage.
Meanwhile, GROGNAR gets back up, defiantly shouting his name and ignoring Aaron's warning. The adventurers rush forward, but are unable to land any serious blows. At least they survive. GROGNAR ultimately just leaps over their heads toward Aaron. The dragon god rushes forward to meet him. Aaron tries to beat down GROGNAR, but the barbarian dodges the blows and gets a grip on Aaron's armor. "NOW WE SEE HOW YOU LIKE GETTING THROWN, PUNY DRAGONMAN!" GROGNAR tosses Aaron back and the god's exit from the building smashes the front door off its hinges in the process. GROGNAR marches forward, laughing manically as Aaron recovers. In fact, he's laughing so hard that he doesn't see the punch incoming before it lands squarely on his chin and launches him into the sky. If GROGNAR survived that, it'll be a while until you see him again.
And then Cormac finally comes back and sees the damage.
Go home with MAGIC!
3Alright. You didn't want to use these powers, but nobody's watching and you really don't want to be in the woods by nightfall. You take a quick look around and teleport back to the outskirts of your village before returning to the pub. When you get there, it's been trashed by no less than three divine beings and four adventurers having a massive brawl with GROGNAR. Through the now-empty doorframe, you can see a massive hole in the back and what looks like a severed arm on the ground beyond. There are also a bunch of unconscious barbarians scattered around.
Author
Topic: Minimalism and Milk 2 (Read 162449 times)