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[Sl4cker]

((Rolled for which command to take))

Kill the skeleton giant and take control of it. You're death, and no other skeleton is going to one up you.

[3]
You feel indignant at your own creation, the mindless brute you fostered from your own spare bones and not-so-spare bones. Only the essence of death is what is keeping the Giant moving - it should sustain itself by killing, seeking you, the End of Life. The only problem is that without a proper mind it would kill indiscriminately, not caring for things like "established lifetimes" and "somatic thanatosis" and "making sure the Boss doesn't smite your bony ass for not doing your job properly". Once the giant is done swiping at already-dead spirits and ignoring the soulless demons of Hell, it's going to make a bee-line for Earth, and giving you more work is the exact opposite of the dumb bonelord's intended purpose.

You are still just a ribcage and skull. Despite being Death, you do still need legs to move. You roll onto your side, before rolling again, barrelling into where your scythe, knocked out of frame by the torrent of bones, has fallen onto the floor, resting with a familiar reaping energy. Having no arms to wield it, you merely roll again onto it, biting the handle, and using it to lever yourself into a relatively stable "standing" position. You can finally see that demons are already beginning to crowd around your office, scratching their chitinous heads. The giant is far from dead and will probably be far from you by the time you can chase the bastard.

BONE GIANT: NOT LOCATED, STILL AT FULL BONELINESS FOR ALL YOU KNOW
YOURSELF: LOW BONELINESS, SCYTHE ACQUIRED
RATTLE: YES

[Person]

Okay I guess that wasn't a good idea. Maybe I thought we were attached to it somehow? Dunno.

Restore physical condition to optimum.

[NJW2000]

Okay I guess that wasn't a good idea. Maybe I thought we were attached to it somehow? Dunno.

Restore physical condition to optimum.

+1. Leg and arm bones of Ajax the Greater.

[hops]

Levitate through pure rage

[Sl4cker]

Okay I guess that wasn't a good idea. Maybe I thought we were attached to it somehow? Dunno.

Restore physical condition to optimum.

+1. Leg and arm bones of Ajax the Greater.

[6] ((holy fucking shit dice stop))

Usually, people wouldn't attempt to obtain the bones of such an elusive figure. Were they in your position, knee-deep (or, you suppose, neck-deep now) in shit, a giant skeleton running around on the loose, surely they'd settle for a haphazard replacement until the original bones from the skeleton were returned to you without fuss. Surely, to obtain the bones of such a magnificent warrior of antiquity would prove too difficult in your weakened state. Though you cannot die, you can be incapacitated, and thus risk letting the Giant Skeleton free. It would be foolish, difficult, and time consuming.

Fuck them. You're Death.

You tightly grip onto your scythe, waiting for a few confused demons to come check in on your rather bland office to see what had happens. When one flies overhead, you suddenly swing the malevolent tool upwards, impaling the red-skinned denizen of Hell through the abdomen. It screeches - nothing on the level of your Deathly Wail, but still annoying to the auditory ossicles - flying about haphazardly with pained curses. You drag the demon to fly past its friends and through Hell, second law of motion be damned, towards where you think Ajax' skeleton is.

It takes you six hours flying through desolate landscapes and seas of flame to get to where the Giant Ajax is, as it turns out you have to travel quite far to get to people born circa 1100 BC. You find the Trojan warrior, armor and all, sitting on a rock all sullen-like. You drop to the sulphurous ground suddenly as the demon gives its last measly breath. Oh well. That's what an abdomen wound does to you. Ajax looks up. You lift your torso up and hit the deceased warrior right in the chest, shattering his armor and the ribcage underneath. And then the skull. And then the- fuck wait no not the limbs you needed those,

Well.

You just rode a demon on a scythe to death for six hours just to shatter fucking Ajax the Greater for no reason. This will result in tremendous amounts of paperwork and you're now ridiculously far from where the Giant you actually WANTED to kill is. You are currently stranded on the section of Hell reserved for the deceased of antiquity, and unless some buttfuck demon flies overhead again, you're stranded there.

GIANT STATUS: THREE-THOUSAND THREE HUNDRED MILES AWAY AND BONELY
YOU STATUS:
AJAX STATUS: SHAME HE DIDN'T WORE THAT DIVINE ARMOR, HUH

[hops]

Try to become bone jelly with the bone shards

[crazyabe]

Fuck work, this is a vacation.

[Person]

Salvage bone shards. If this fails, try again with Achilles.

[Sl4cker]

((rolled again for which command to pick - the dice love person i guess))

Salvage bone shards. If this fails, try again with Achilles.

[5]
Fuck it, you're taking this. You sweep up all the shattered bits of Ajax through anger alone and slam them into eachother to rebuild him. Or more specifically, his limbs - the (nominally) less shattered remains of the giant clicking together to form two pairs of arms and legs. It actually works - a set of perfectly workable skeleton limbs lay before you, ready to become your perfectly workable skeleton limbs. You even managed to make the bones appropriately sized for you, instead of having a tiny skull and ribcage with BIG MACHO ARMS.

Your boneliness is restored to full. You are still stranded, with Hell of a way to go to get back to your office. Literally.

STATUS: TOOK LONG ENOUGH TO HAVE SOMETHING GO RIGHT
AJAX STATUS: rest in pieces
GM STATUS: RUNNING OUT OF JOKES TO MAKE FOR STATUSES

[Doomblade187]

Let's repair Ajax and then get that bone giant! And then libreoffice. Because budgetary reasons.

((Ah, minimalism.))

[crazyabe]

Vacation, Now.

[Secheral]

Call the one in charge of Life and convince him to take care of the mess. Then vacation.

[Egan_BW]

Slam scythe into the hell-soil on the ground, splitting it open and creating a hellportal to hell, specifically to the giant skeletal we need to slay.

[Person]

Slam scythe into the hell-soil on the ground, splitting it open and creating a hellportal to hell, specifically to the giant skeletal we need to slay.

+1

[Madman198237]

Slam scythe into the hell-soil on the ground, splitting it open and creating a hellportal to hell, specifically to the giant skeletal we need to slay.

+1

+1