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Author Topic: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?  (Read 1720 times)

Nilbert

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Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« on: January 06, 2017, 05:52:03 pm »

In two weeks, we will have a new President in the US.  Having a habit of playing DF while watching the news and having just read Xazo-Tek's "We Need a Wall Along the Elvish Border" thread, I have had epiphany. 

Donald Trump may indeed really be a dwarf.

This thread is designed to record observations and sound logical arguments that either confirm or refute whether President Donald Trump is indeed really President Urist McTrump. And, please include the number of accumulated points per argument or observation so that we can come to a consensus.  Please, only one point per observation or argument and no repeats!

And please if you wish to post, no vulgarity, obscenity, hateful statements, or nastiness.  This thread is for comedy only, and of course, identifying true dwarfiness.

To start it off, the first 10 observations and arguments:

1.  As brilliantly discussed on Xazo-Tek's thread, President McTrump does wish to build a wall.  Elves?  I think not.  Migrants!  Unwanted migrants.  Indeed, what dwarfy overseer does not want a wall to keep out migrants?  +1 towards President McTrump
2.  President McTrump wants to build a wall, not a fence (at least to begin with) or a combination of aerial and ground patrols.  It is a wall.  Do dwarves bother with fences?  No.  Do they use helicoptors?  No.  Do they like going on patrol outside?  Oh no!  Seems like another point towards dwarfiness.  +1 towards President McTrump
3.  President McTrump believes in bilateral trade, not unilateral trade.  Dwarves only deal with one merchant group at a time.  They also only make deals with the mountain home.  Definitely a dwarfy plan.  +1 towards President McTrump
4.  President Trump is tall, over six feet I believe.  Kind of a stretch for a dwarf...  +1 towards President Trump
5.  But, as pointed out by Senator Rubio, he does have small hands.  As do dwarves!  +1 towards President McTrump
6.  The easy one.  President McTrump loves building really big, massive, yuge perhaps, buildings.  Total dwarfiness.  +1 towards President McTrump
7.  President McTrump has a gold plated bathroom.  Who else than a dwarf would put gold plates on the walls and floors?  +1 towards President McTrump
8.  Ummm...  but it is a bathroom.  Real dwarves don't use bathrooms...  +1 towards President Trump
9.  He named his son Baron.  Dwarves have barons.  +1 towards President McTrump
10.  Dwarvish thoughts only come in one or two sentences.  I have yet to see a dwarvish thought exceeding 140 characters.  That seems oddly familiar with President McTrump's tweets.  +1 towards President McTrump

Running Total:
8 points President Urist McTrump
2 points President Donald Trump
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Asin

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #1 on: January 07, 2017, 01:22:24 pm »

Oh my Armok!

ReynTheLord

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #2 on: January 08, 2017, 06:40:42 pm »

Panics over things and causes a tantrumspiral. +1 to urist mctrump
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Salmeuk

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #3 on: January 09, 2017, 02:51:49 pm »

ehhh, general discussion maybe? The 'wall' thread was bad enough
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Nilbert

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #4 on: January 09, 2017, 05:00:25 pm »

Thanks Saleuk!  I agree and thought I had put this in the general discussion.  My apologies.  How do I move it, if I can?
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Gwolfski

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #5 on: January 09, 2017, 06:08:52 pm »

Thanks Saleuk!  I agree and thought I had put this in the general discussion.  My apologies.  How do I move it, if I can?
Move button beside the reply, notify etc. buttons.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #6 on: January 09, 2017, 07:07:05 pm »

Isn't a former mayor, and he's not fond of dressing in purple. Does look like an RNG generated him though so that's +1

smjjames

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #7 on: January 09, 2017, 07:14:30 pm »

Lol this thread. :D
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Nilbert

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #8 on: January 09, 2017, 07:16:05 pm »

Thanks Salmeuk and Gwolfski for helping on the move!

13.  Not sure how I missed this one.  Doesn't have a beard.  +1 for President Trump
14.  On a similar note, future First Lady Melanie also does not have a beard.  +1 for President Trump

Running total...

President Urist McTrump +10, President Donald Trump +4
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Max™

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #9 on: January 09, 2017, 07:26:35 pm »

There is nothing dwarfy about him, no beard, no magma, he's just some shmuck human administrator with delusions of lordship.
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Nilbert

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #10 on: January 09, 2017, 07:29:41 pm »

Sounds like Max has hit on a key point.

15.  No magma.  What dwarf wouldn't have magma?!?!?  +1 towards President Trump

Running total...

President Urist McTrump +10, President Donald Trump +5
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Shadowlord

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #11 on: January 09, 2017, 07:33:45 pm »

Doesn't murder elves
Doesn't murder goblins
Doesn't murder kobolds
Vladimir Putin has not installed "indoor plumbing" in Trump's apartment
Has never seen a megabeast
Doesn't throw up when he goes outside
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Nilbert

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #12 on: January 09, 2017, 07:38:55 pm »

Thanks Shadowlord!  All valid, but I would have to say the word 'murder' in reference to elves is a little strong.  So we can keep a total

16.  Doesn't murder appropriately deal with elves.  +1 for President Trump
17.  Doesn't murder goblins. +1 for President Trump
18.  Doesn't murder kobolds. +1 for President Trump
19.  Vladimir Putin has not installed "indoor plumbing" in Trump's apartment (took me a while to get this, but funny!)   +1 for President Trump
20.  Has never seen a megabeast. +1 for President Trump
21. Doesn't throw up when he goes outslide.   +1 for President Trump

Running Total

President Urist McTrump +10, President Donald Trump +11

Tides have turned!  Please keep score and a running total when you post!  Thanks!
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #13 on: January 09, 2017, 07:48:25 pm »

Imports from ISIS: Terror
Offerings to ISIS: Vengeance

+1 to score

Dozebôm Lolumzalìs

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Re: Is the President Elect Really a Dwarf?
« Reply #14 on: January 09, 2017, 07:58:25 pm »

Quote
doesn't throw up when he goes outside

Sure he does. How else do you explain the neverending stream of muck that spews from his mouth?
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