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Author Topic: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American: T+0  (Read 1421849 times)

mainiac

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4770 on: September 26, 2016, 01:36:47 pm »

Martin O'Malley is America's backup QB.
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« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4771 on: September 26, 2016, 02:31:51 pm »

So, what about rules for a debate drinking game?

Trump lies - Take half a sip
Trump says "wall" or "email" - Take a sip
Clinton says "Trump University" -take two sip
Trump interrupt clinton - take a sip
Hillary says she should be elected because she is a woman - Full glass.
We need to stop disguising murder as drinking games.
Murder is "audience claps" take a drop

mainiac

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4772 on: September 26, 2016, 02:32:56 pm »

The audience isn't allowed to clap.
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"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4773 on: September 26, 2016, 02:33:37 pm »

So, what about rules for a debate drinking game?

Trump lies - Take half a sip
Trump says "wall" or "email" - Take a sip
Clinton says "Trump University" -take two sip
Trump interrupt clinton - take a sip
Hillary says she should be elected because she is a woman - Full glass.
This has prompted me to dig up Strife and I's Republican Primary drinking game for modification.

Asterisk denotes double for specific candidate.
Ex. "Promising to sign the TPP *H" is a single swallow for Trump, but two for Hilary. In the final category, this demands making an earnest attempt to die of alcohol poisoning, which will probably be self-mercy if any of that actually happens.

End Of The Republic 2016 Debate 1 Drinking Game

Sips:
Every time someone says something that's completely cross-ways to reality
Someone mispronouncing a word in an amusing fashion
Obvious attempts to ignore whatever Trump is saying *T
Poor pivots to blame Congress or any Trump-owned business for something
"Jobs"
Unmarked Reagan quote *H
"Rebuilding family values" or "Promoting greater diversity"
"Christian Nation" or "Diverse Spirituality"
"Balance the Budget"
Generic Motivational Speaker Mode Activated
"X is not what America is about!"
"China!"

Decent Swallow:
Every time someone says something that's too racist/offensive to say in polite company *H
Blatant pandering to a minority group
Candidate flubbing delivery such that they're advocating the opposite of actual platform
Any mention of a candidate's weight or lack thereof
Bragging about nonpolitical or inherent credentials.
2nd Amendment veiled death threat *H
Low-blow against non-politician family members
Tenuous definitions of socialism or white nationalism
Suggests reducing power of Supreme Court or Congress
You are over 90% certain that'll be a highlight on Right Wing Watch or Breitbart by tomorrow
Godwin'd
Implying anybody is sympathetic to ISIS
Anybody Mentions Benghazi
Promises to do anything the President can't do
Plugging their website URL or a Hashtag
Accusing the other candidate of illegal fundraising
Negative reference to a candidate's health
Coughing fit *H
Discussing Trump University
Discussing Email Server
Discussing Bill Clinton's policy actions
"Deplorable" or "Shill"
Discussing dangers of refugees
Moderators obviously aggravated
Anybody actually talks about the climate crisis
Reveling in the deaths of America's enemies

Finish the Drink:
"Thanks Obama!" *H
Accusing anyone of treason
Any questioning of legal qualifications to be president
Attributes anything done by Dubya to Barry
Gets in an argument about what Founding Fathers are best role models.
Promising or implying that they will use nuclear weapons *H
Promises to disestablish in perpetuity any federal agency or department
Promises to pass a constitutional amendment
Anybody at any point mentioning Pepe The Frog
Implying a candidate is in too poor health to survive presidency
Either Mike Pence or Tim Kaine attain any relevance whatsoever
Candidate found to be wearing any sort of brace or catheter
Discussing Bill Clinton's infidelity
Any 2016ism derails the debate
Accusing candidate of sexual immorality
Reference to other candidate's genitalia
Moderators warn candidates to stop bad behavior
Advocating outright conspiracy theory

Drink until Unconsciousness:
You become enthusiastic to vote for one of the candidates
Internet meme other than Pepe
Candidate promises to exile other candidate from America
Candidate's hair is is fake and falls off. *T
Promises to prosecute Obama after he leaves office *H
Candidate collapses onstage *H/T
Moderators yell at candidates
Candidate doesn't show up for debate

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Quote from: Thomas Paine
To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead, or endeavoring to convert an atheist by scripture.
Quote
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mainiac

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4774 on: September 26, 2016, 02:39:06 pm »

Drink until Unconsciousness:
You become enthusiastic to vote for one of the candidates

Oh darn and I was really looking forward to watching the debate.
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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
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"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4775 on: September 26, 2016, 02:40:42 pm »

Drink until Unconsciousness:
You become enthusiastic to vote for one of the candidates

Oh darn and I was really looking forward to watching the debate.
Don't worry, you can get an exemption if you keep a salt-lick in your mouth the whole debate.
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Quote from: Thomas Paine
To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead, or endeavoring to convert an atheist by scripture.
Quote
No Gods, No Masters.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4776 on: September 26, 2016, 02:44:24 pm »

The audience isn't allowed to clap.
The right to clapping will not be infringed

mainiac

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4777 on: September 26, 2016, 02:49:04 pm »

Yes it will.  Free speech doesn't mean the right to interrupt conversations.
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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
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[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

WealthyRadish

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4778 on: September 26, 2016, 03:00:26 pm »

« Last Edit: September 26, 2016, 03:24:09 pm by UrbanGiraffe »
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4779 on: September 26, 2016, 03:02:53 pm »

Yes it will.  Free speech doesn't mean the right to interrupt conversations.
I was making a joke but yeah it does include that, it's just very rude

I still love that one Obama speech where he says thank you for 15 minutes straight cos the clapping goes on in glorious harmony

mainiac

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4780 on: September 26, 2016, 03:30:22 pm »

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Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
--------------
[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

smjjames

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4782 on: September 26, 2016, 04:59:31 pm »

Something from that site which has nothing to do with the debates: http://usuncut.com/news/houston-shooter-dressed-wwii-era-nazi-mornings-rampage/

O.o

In general though, the guy that did it sounded like someone who simply snapped.
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Criptfeind

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4783 on: September 26, 2016, 05:01:28 pm »

http://usuncut.com/news/surgeon-general-warns-drinking-every-time-trump-lies-debate-result-acute-alcohol-poisoning/

This would be funny if true, but I can't seem to find any source. I'm guessing maybe an onion style piece? Although their stories aren't as blatantly so if that's the case...
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Frumple

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Re: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American
« Reply #4784 on: September 26, 2016, 05:04:11 pm »

I'm mostly just wondering if there actually is an uptick in alcohol poisoning on the day(s) of the debate(s), m'self. That would be an interesting statistic to track.
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