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Author Topic: SPACETIME YOGAQUEST - Turn 3.7 - update 16th Feb  (Read 27613 times)

IronyOwl

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Re: SPACEYOGA YOGATIME - Turn 1.5
« Reply #75 on: June 30, 2016, 07:06:17 pm »

((There there, it'll all be alright. I mean, it'll still be on fire and crewed by imbeciles, but the world is a resilient thing. Like a zombie!))


"No, meat is pretty good for distracting dogs. And maybe we should bring some baby carrots for the gerbil? We'll cut down on his allies while establishing our own moral credibility!"

Don't forget the baby carrots! I think gerbils like carrots, anyway. Boy is it going to be embarrassing if they only like sunflower seeds.
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Quote from: Radio Controlled (Discord)
A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

Pancaek

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Re: SPACEYOGA YOGATIME - Turn 1.5
« Reply #76 on: July 01, 2016, 09:48:38 am »

"I'm going to need a sausage, a bottle of sleeping pills, some duct tape and a crowbar. Not sure what I'll use the crowbar for yet, but I guess I'll know it when I see it."

Attempt to acquire a crowbar, a sausage, duct tape and some sleeping pills.
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lawastooshort

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Re: SPACEYOGA YOGATIME - Turn 1.5
« Reply #77 on: July 06, 2016, 11:29:53 am »


A SMALL TOWN IN LATE TWENTIETH CENTURY AMERICA…


Turn 1.6

The Yogakas hang about after class, some waiting to walk home, some waiting for their mothers to pick them up, all filled with new-found power, and with excitement about the evening’s totally legal activity.

"Uhh..."

"Yeah?"

"S-sensei says we need to plan our equipment, brother yoga-ers…"

"All we need is Yoga, dudes. And maybe parkour."

"Maybe what?"

"No, but meat is pretty good for distracting dogs. And maybe we should bring some baby carrots for the gerbil? We'll cut down on his allies while establishing our own moral credibility!"

"Our what?"

"Dudes, what could a gerbil possibly do against the massed forces of Yoga? Gerbils will tremble before me!"

Fisk does a miniature excited-boy Yoga air kick at about gerbil height.

"What? A miniature gerbil wouldn’t tremble at your yoga, dude."

"Shut up.”

"Well, anyway, maybe, we need, like, a rope? Or, uh... a claw hammer?"

"Yeah! To hammer the gerbil after it defeats Fisk!"

"Shut up.”

"And also, wait, no... a steak? Yeah, a steak. Or maybe like a chicken."

"Yeah! To er… chicken the ger- er… Yeah! And I'm going to need a sausage, a bottle of sleeping pills, some duct tape and a crowbar. Not sure what I'll use the crowbar for yet, but I guess I'll know it when I see it. Probably something small and squeaky."

"Shut up.”



The Yogakas hang about in the street, not far from 328 Charlton Avenue, some holding a crowbar and a can of hotdogs, some holding carrots, and some holding a naked headless turkey.

"Uhh..."

It’s 6pm, or eighteen hundred hours in the military parlance of the professionally trained Yoga student, and dinner is being served in the front room of the Jackson family house.





Spoiler: note (click to show/hide)
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Harry Baldman

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Re: YOGAYOGA YOGATIME - Captain Turn 1.6
« Reply #78 on: July 06, 2016, 11:42:39 am »

"Okay, so, uh... let's see what happens!"

Toss the naked headless turkey into the yard experimentally, doing a proper windup for the throw. Maybe get one of the others to help. I wasn't specifically excluded from the junior football team for nothing, after all. Well, I guess technically I was, but not in the sense of what that statement would immediately imply.

((wait, did we defrost the turkey before coming here or what))
« Last Edit: July 06, 2016, 11:45:50 am by Harry Baldman »
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lawastooshort

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Re: YOGAYOGA YOGATIME - Captain Turn 1.6
« Reply #79 on: July 06, 2016, 12:09:10 pm »

((I'll let you decide, or I'll let you decide for me to roll for it... It's your turkey after all))

((I can see arguments for and against. Did you steal the turkey? Buy it? Was it a gift? Although the description doesn't imply so, is it cooked? Perhaps I should put the turn on hold and run an entire turkey theft scene turn. If I had been in inspired form perhaps I would have. Damn))
« Last Edit: July 06, 2016, 12:12:30 pm by lawastooshort »
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Harry Baldman

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Re: YOGAYOGA YOGATIME - Captain Turn 1.6
« Reply #80 on: July 06, 2016, 12:20:15 pm »

((I think I'll just let the uncertainty sit for now. I love it when I write an action that I can think of going wrong in at least seven hilarious ways.))
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Sosoku234

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Re: YOGAYOGA YOGATIME - Captain Turn 1.6
« Reply #81 on: July 06, 2016, 01:52:18 pm »

Loiter around the bully's neighborhood, after all, this is the 80's right? We're free range.
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IronyOwl

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Re: YOGAYOGA YOGATIME - Captain Turn 1.6
« Reply #82 on: July 07, 2016, 01:36:32 pm »

Attempt to scamper up to a window from the back! Clearly this will not create enough noise to attract attention or separate me from my fellow yogakas.
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Quote from: Radio Controlled (Discord)
A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

Pancaek

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Re: YOGAYOGA YOGATIME - Captain Turn 1.6
« Reply #83 on: July 07, 2016, 02:07:46 pm »

Start cramming the sleeping pills in the sausage. Otherwise just loiter around for now, maybe try to hide the crowbar in my jacket a bit.
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lawastooshort

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Re: YOGAYOGA YOGATIME - t1.7
« Reply #84 on: July 13, 2016, 07:41:50 am »

A SMALL TOWN IN LATE TWENTIETH CENTURY AMERICA… EIGHTEEN HUNDRED AND ONE HOURS


Turn 1.7
 
Start cramming the sleeping pills in the sausage. Otherwise just loiter around for now, maybe try to hide the crowbar in my jacket a bit.

Outside the Jackson family house, in quiet Charlton Avenue, the silence of dozens of approaching dinners is suddenly shattered by a piercing scream!

”My groin! My groin! OHGODOHGODOHGOD MY GROIN!!”

[1] Richard collapse to the floor, clutching his groin in excruciating self-inflicted pain, until he realises, through his panic, that the pain has passed. But being pretty concerned about the side effects of stabbing himself in the crotch with a crowbar, he stands up and rips his trousers off and peers down his underpants. [rtd 5] There's no blood!

Richard almost faints with joy.
 
Loiter around the bully's neighborhood, after all, this is the 80's right? We're free range.

”Ahhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhh!!”

Fisk thinks Richard is getting nekkid in the street.

”Ahhhhhhhhhh!!”

He's gonna get arrested for conspiracy to get publicly nekkid.

”Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!”

He’s gonna have a sex offender record for life because of yoga.

”PUT YOUR NADS AWAY DUDE!”

Oh god there's an approaching car. Oh god it must be the cops. OH SHIT.

”DUDE! DUDE!!”

There's only one response to such a situation! Fisk flees!

[1] Bam!

Fisk runs straight into the road, and is smacked right over by the approaching car, and is knocked 20 feet down the road, [rtd 5] where he lands completely unharmed. The car skids to a halt and a middle aged man gets out.

”Shit son, what the hell do you think you're doing! You okay? Aw shit, why the hell is your friend getting naked in the street? Don’t you know there’s laws against that son? I’ve a good mind to call the police.”
 
Attempt to scamper up to a window from the back! Clearly this will not create enough noise to attract attention or separate me from my fellow yogakas.

[4] Before everything goes horribly wrong, Edith decides to put a decisive plan into action and scampers round the house and across the backyard to a window. She pops her head up like a baby mole and peers in. She sees Mrs Jackson putting the finishing touches on three plates of burgers and fries. Just as she pops her head back down there’s a crashing sound from the front yard.
 
Toss the naked headless turkey into the yard experimentally, doing a proper windup for the throw. Maybe get one of the others to help. I wasn't specifically excluded from the junior football team for nothing, after all. Well, I guess technically I was, but not in the sense of what that statement would immediately imply.

[4; Turkey Status 4] Back at the front of the house, Jarvis athletically winds his defrosted turkey round and round before letting go and flinging it literally feet into the air, over the picket fence and hedge and bang into the trashcan lid, which sounds a bit like a drunkard falling on half a drumkit.

A few seconds pass and the front door opens.

Jarvis ducks behind a bush; Fisk and Richard are behind the stopped car in the road a short distance away.

”Always bloody dinner time. Damn fecking neighbours. Can’t control their damn bloody dogs. Should keep to their own damn tra- aw what the hell… a whole turkey this time? Now that just takes the biscuit. That’s a damn waste.”

Mr Jackson bends over to pick up the turkey.
 




Spoiler: note (click to show/hide)
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Harry Baldman

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Re: YOGASPACE QUESTTIME - Turn 1.7
« Reply #85 on: July 13, 2016, 09:03:19 am »

"Uhh..."

Mr. Jackson is distracted! Use the opportunity to sneak into the house.
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lawastooshort

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Re: YOGASPACE QUESTTIME - Turn 1.7
« Reply #86 on: July 13, 2016, 09:17:32 am »

((I meant to add in my note that that was perhaps the most boring thrown turkey in any rtd ever. When I first read the action I could see the frozen solid turkey going through the open garage door, smashing through the car and exploding the petrol tank, ripping the side of the house off and setting a blazing inferno. But no. I guess there was a 4 in 6 chance of it not being like that.))
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Sosoku234

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Re: YOGASPACE QUESTTIME - Turn 1.7
« Reply #87 on: July 13, 2016, 09:52:16 am »

"Don't include me in that police call. I'm trying to get away from here."

Sprint around the block and come in through the back.
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IronyOwl

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Re: YOGASPACE QUESTTIME - Turn 1.7
« Reply #88 on: July 13, 2016, 09:15:08 pm »

((Edith best baby mole.

Also we've finally had our first crotch injury and nekkidness. Being on fire can't be far behind, turkey's grace notwithstanding.))


Edith figures the crash is as good a distraction as any.

Surreptitiously burrow into the house, locating the gerbil and purchasing its loyalty with carrots!
Logged
Quote from: Radio Controlled (Discord)
A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

Pancaek

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Re: YOGASPACE QUESTTIME - Turn 1.7
« Reply #89 on: July 14, 2016, 08:06:56 am »

"Oh, I'm sorry sir. For a second there I thought I was in America, the land of the free. Used to be in my poppa's day when a man got stabbed in the crotch he could check it for damage without someone threatening to call the police on him. Go ahead, call up the man and let them take away your freedom. You communist."

Put clothes back on. Then casually make my way down the street away from the house, in order to not attract the attention of the communist driver to what my mates are doing at the house
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