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[JoshuaFH]

I just feel so twisted and angry inside today. Just really desperate for no reason. I just want to get angry and pick a fight with someone. I'm too weak to win, my muscles are worthless, it's ridiculous that I'm even a man. I try to run on a treadmill, I read online that 5km (3.1 miles) is something that most people can do in 30 minutes, and I struggle and have to push myself extremely hard just to make 2 miles in 30 minutes. I just want to get the shit beaten out of me. I think I was doing really good since I ran for 30 minutes on the treadmill for 4 of the last 6 days, but I wimped out today because I got to the gym and realized I had put on a dirty shirt, and I got embarrassed and just left. I'm not sure what I can do when my self-hatred just goes out of control like this. No matter how good a streak I get on, it's just a matter of time til I fall off the horse and eat shit.

I don't know what to do. I guess I'll just throw that shirt away and go again tomorrow.

[Kagus]

"Most people can do in 30 minutes"

Yeah, no. Y'know what the army standard of acceptance was? 3km in 15 minutes. That's the level we were supposed to adhere to, despite 70% of the (pushed and exercised every day) platoon only clearing that level after we'd already been in the army for almost a year, getting tested both at intake and halfway through the year.

And you can't just double the time and expect double the distance, bodies really do not work that way.


EDIT: As an addendum, remember that we had very physical jobs, extremely physical and pushy officers, and were used to a roughly 6-8000 calorie per day diet when out in the field (where we often were).

[Hanslanda]

I'm lean and fairly good running shape and two miles takes me about 25 minutes. You're doing just fine Josh. Most people flat can't run two miles. Period.

[Gentlefish]

I just feel so twisted and angry inside today. Just really desperate for no reason. I just want to get angry and pick a fight with someone. I'm too weak to win, my muscles are worthless, it's ridiculous that I'm even a man. I try to run on a treadmill, I read online that 5km (3.1 miles) is something that most people can do in 30 minutes, and I struggle and have to push myself extremely hard just to make 2 miles in 30 minutes. I just want to get the shit beaten out of me. I think I was doing really good since I ran for 30 minutes on the treadmill for 4 of the last 6 days, but I wimped out today because I got to the gym and realized I had put on a dirty shirt, and I got embarrassed and just left. I'm not sure what I can do when my self-hatred just goes out of control like this. No matter how good a streak I get on, it's just a matter of time til I fall off the horse and eat shit.

I don't know what to do. I guess I'll just throw that shirt away and go again tomorrow.

...Yooo sounds like there's some toxic masculinity happening here.
I, personally, am terribly out of shape. I can bench less than 100lbs, and squat maybe 150 lbs. I'm 6'1" and ~240 lbs myself. You don't gotta be a slab of meat to be a man. If you're working out, make sure you're doing it for you.

As for the dirty shirt, unless it's very visibly stained anywhere but the armpits, it's a workout shirt. No one's going to care about sweat stains. Heck, chances are people are pointedly ignoring everyone else at the gym.

I'm starting, in spring, to do the couch-to-5k. A 10-minute mile is currently well out of reach for me. It's more like a 15 minute mile, and that's power-walking. It's a course of a few months to get there.

Falling off the horse happens. Progress isn't smooth and constant, it's starts and stops and a few backslides as you figure things out. The best way to get through is to get back on. Take your time on the treadmill, and you'll see your times come down. But it'll take a while. That's how bodies work.

I know this is totally not-asked-for so please forgive me if I stepped over any boundaries! I've been there myself, and it really truly sucked.

[Egan_BW]

Bah, gyms are depressing places. Just figure out a nice place to walk around and. Actually walk around sometimes. It does you a lot of good, and not just physically.


Also, that wasn't a mildsad, Joshua.

[Kagus]

Our eldest pup (still not "old" really, about 6 years and a small breed) had something of an accident today... He'd been stressing out around the door and making noise, and we figured he was probably just being neurotic again (and he is neurotic, terribly so). GF asked if I'd remembered to take them for a walk earlier today, I said yes (I remember we rounded the school slightly before recess, which is a notable time because the kids adore the dogs and I get worn out being social with the kids)... And there were still a few hours until our standard evening walk time, so it didn't really make sense that he'd need to make a bathroom run right this minute, and he was being a bit of an annoyance so GF plopped him in my arms to get him to chill out... Or at least hold still so we don't have to follow him around in case he did try something.

I was sitting with him for a bit, and he seemed mostly fine... But then started getting exceptionally stressed, hyperventilating, shivering, staring wide-eyed (wider than usual, that is), and pulling the corners of his mouth back. He was also very intent on getting out of my arms and down from the bed, so I thought he might be having an upset stomach and was gonna puke.

I took him into the bathroom and stuck him in the shower, which is our go-to emergency puke zone on the occasions when we can actually relocate them. He was a bit confused/stressed at first, made a couple rounds, whined a little bit... And then started peeing.

It was clear he'd been holding in a fair amount. This wasn't a standard "lift leg up and let fly" affair, this was a burst dam scenario, and he ended up standing there for a long time as he had a lot that had built up.

When he was done, I let him know it was okay, let him out, and flushed the evidence down with a spray from the showerhead. I kept comforting him, and he looked like he was feeling a lot better, wagging his tail (which is generally reserved for special occasions with him) and bouncing around in a sprightly fashion.

So with the damage done, I let him back out into the main apartment without keeping him restrained as before. He wandered around a bit and clearly wanted to hop up on GF's lap while she was watching Outlander, and I went back to my computer after playing with him a bit to double check that he was feeling better and didn't need any other sudden preparations. He went back to bugging GF about lap-time, and she irritably snatched him up and shot me an eye for not keeping him under control during his "neurotic funtime".

I didn't want him (or me) getting any undue criticism, so I got her to take her headset off and explained that he'd basically just reached his bladder's limit, and that we'd handled things in the shower. Everything was washed down and appeared to be handled.

"Well that's why I asked if you'd taken them for a walk", was her response. So, I reiterated... I had taken them for a walk, both of them. Both had done all manner of necessary doings outside. We had taken the full standard route, not a shortened version, and it was well within standard parameters for walk-taking timeslots, and not like I'd walked them at 6 AM and expected them to just hold it until 11 in the evening.

She just murmured a bit and turned back around to watch the rest of the Outlander episode, cuddling the dog.


I was a bit sharper in tone than necessary when I repeated that I'd taken them for a walk, but dang... I did not enjoy the implication that I'd lied about/misremembered taking them for a walk, doing "my one thing".

[Maximum Spin]

... I tell you, if it were me, I'd be happily single after that.

[Yoink]

I can jog non-stop less than a kilometer before my lungs give up on me.

Just the idea of running, outdoors, where people might observe me doing so, is too terrifying to consider.
The few occasions when I do break into a run is where a crossing light goes green and it's too late to save face by turning and pretending to be headed in a different direction, or when I spot the bus (or other mode of public transport) I need to catch idling at a stop up ahead. It's an almost-daily struggle for me.

[heydude6]

I can jog non-stop less than a kilometer before my lungs give up on me.

Just the idea of running, outdoors, where people might observe me doing so, is too terrifying to consider.
The few occasions when I do break into a run is where a crossing light goes green and it's too late to save face by turning and pretending to be headed in a different direction, or when I spot the bus (or other mode of public transport) I need to catch idling at a stop up ahead. It's an almost-daily struggle for me.

If you really are dedicated to learning how to run, get off from the bus a few stops before your usual stop. You will have to walk the rest of the distance home or you will waste money paying another bus fare. It find that it’s actually pretty motivating once you actually do it. The problem is deciding if all that effort really is worth it in the end.

[Yoink]

I have no qualms about walking, sometimes for miles on end.
Heck, I often walk a few bus stops-worth of distance to the next suburb for food. Running, though? Terrifying.

[Hanslanda]

I have no qualms about walking, sometimes for miles on end.
Heck, I often walk a few bus stops-worth of distance to the next suburb for food. Running, though? Terrifying.

I feel exactly the same about eating salad and veganism. 

[Kagus]

Running is high-impact and terrible, go swimming instead. It's fun, and it gives you abs too!

And really, that's the only reason anyone exercises anyways.


Did you hear about the hipster bodybuilder? He got washboard abs so he could clean his clothes.

[IcyTea31]

I got to the gym and realized I had put on a dirty shirt, and I got embarrassed and just left.

A gym is the last place to worry about your clothes' cleanliness, as you'll be sweating enough to make them dirty soon enough anyway. Exercise is about self-improvement, not about looking good while doing it. Leave your vanity for another day and just pump that iron.

[Yoink]

Just realised that I've somehow neglected to do laundry all week. Why do I do this to myself?! I sure hope tomorrow is another of these impressively productive days, so I can ge-- actually, wait, I just checked the weather forecast and it's not supposed to rain all day tomorrow at the least. I guess I should probably do my laundry now so that it's ready for me to wear tomorrow night... thanks, Bay12!
Always a big help bouncing ideas off you guys.   

* Yoink begins working towards summoning the necessary motivation to go do laundry at 10pm.

   

I have no qualms about walking, sometimes for miles on end.
Heck, I often walk a few bus stops-worth of distance to the next suburb for food. Running, though? Terrifying.

I feel exactly the same about eating salad and veganism. 

So... social anxiety is the main hurdle preventing you from going vegan? Sweet! We can work through that!

[Hanslanda]

I have no qualms about walking, sometimes for miles on end.
Heck, I often walk a few bus stops-worth of distance to the next suburb for food. Running, though? Terrifying.

I feel exactly the same about eating salad and veganism. 

So... social anxiety is the main hurdle preventing you from going vegan? Sweet! We can work through that!

Nah, eating salad and veggies is fine. Veganism is terrifying world without sweet savory meat flavors.