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Voting closed: October 08, 2015, 10:25:56 pm

[Bearskie]

Got the save. Before we roll, here are the dorfings first:

Aristotle was already dorfed beforehand. You are an Adept Brewer and Competent Grower.

Spoiler: Aristotle (click to show/hide)

Tonnot, we dont really have dedicated butchers, so I got you a Skilled Brewer, who is also a rusty novice in butchering and gelding.

Spoiler: Tonnot (click to show/hide)

SQman, as per requested, you're a ranger. Your specialty is Expert Marksdwarf and Expert Archer. Other skills include rusty novice in dodger, animal dissector, trapper and hunting.

Spoiler: SQman (click to show/hide)

Hiddenleafguy, I've appointed you as manager. And crap, I didn't realise you were that old. Your only noteworthy skill is Proficient Herbalist, which gives you and your arthritis an exemption from back-breaking hauling duty.

Spoiler: Hiddenleafguy (click to show/hide)

[QuQuasar]

Neat! Well, while we're on the subject of dorfings, here's the 7 founders:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Neblime: Carpenter. Young (54).

A once-thin woman, now bearing "enormous thick layers of fat". Hardly surprising, since she's friends with the head cook. Has a grudge against Gwolfski and May.

Personality-wise, a depressing person to be around. Worships the Queen of the Gods Zefon and the King of Wealth Istrath.

Hates hamsters for some reason.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Taupe: Militia Commander and Spearman. Middle aged (66).

Very thin, inexhaustible and quite strong. Very neatly combed beard, mustache and sideburns. Gets along okay with everyone.

Easily falls in love, values friendship and likes helping others, but is quarrelsome, considers altruism foolish and never shows mercy... so basically, your standard antihero. Worships Tecak, the god of Agriculture, and a rather strange goddess called "Rurack Mirrormystery the Bewildering Cloak", who presides over Mist. I have no idea what to make of her: some sort of grim reaper, maybe?

Also, loathes hamsters. What is it with hamsters?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

May: Bookkeeper, Animal Trainer and Chief Medical Dwarf. Older (76).

Corpulent but agile. Dark skin and long hair tied in a ponytail. Friends with the Quasar, doesn't like Neblime. Worships Berul, the god of fortresses.

Confident under pressure, with a lot of willpower and ability to focus, and brave in the face of danger. Exactly the dwarf to keep a cool head in a crisis, despite being physically weak.

Hates rats. Maybe something there was some sort of horrible rodent-related incident back in the mountainhome and they're all traumatized?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Quasar: head cook and recently elected mayor. Middle aged (63).

She would be very thin but "bears an enormous lardy burden", and "her hair is clean shaven". I am okay with this! Bald and fat with a great big meat cleaver. Likes everyone except Gwolfski.

She's impartial, confident, can handle stress and keeps things practical, but not very analytical and has poor focus. Worships Tecak the goddess of Agriculture, and Rurack the girl of the mists.

She likes bolts, so she should be good as far as nobles go. Keep your marksdwarves and hunters stocked with ammo and she'll be happy.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Bearskie: head Planter. Old (78)

Average in size, no real notable features. Like most planters, he's easy to overlook. No grudges, but only May and Psychoangel consider him a friend.

He is completely convinced of his own worthlessness, but combines this with ambition. He *wants* to be better. He's also dumb as a brick, but he has patience and willpower, so... um... good for him. He worships Tecak the goddess of agriculture. Makes sense, he is a farmer afterall.

Hates spiders. Seems fair enough.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Gwolfski: Woodcutter, mason, mechanic, architect, you get the idea. Old (86)

He is fat and bald, and his hair is just starting to get flecks of grey in it. Has a grudge against both Quasar and Neblime.

He's lazy and has no ambition, and is very calm, trusting and not at all envious. A laid back sort of guy. I'm not sure where those grudges come from. Worship's the gods of wealth and agriculture.

He likes hippo's.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Psychoangel: Brewer. Young (57)

Corpulent, long mustache and beard. He is good friend to everyone, including Quasar. My enormous lardy burden is contagious, that's what it is.

He doesn't care what others think of him, shares his thoughts with everyone, and is open to changing his mind. Just generally a great guy. Everyone wants to be friends with the brewer. He worships the head goddess and the god of wealth.

He absolutely detests... hamsters. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU ALL? WHAT HAMSTERY HELL HAVE YOU SEEN?!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The Gods.

Not a bad pantheon, as far as pantheon's go. I really want to know what Rurack's deal is, though. The Girl of Mist. She's creepy.

[Bearskie]

Bearskie’s Journal

This page is marked by a quinoa flower.

Don’t say I didn’t call it, because I did. Neblime’s just stepped down as overseer this night. One long year of toil and work, and all we have to show for it is a bunch of sandy bedrooms. Even a hillock could do better.

It’s a shame, because this place could be so much more than a glorified heat sink. It has potential. The soil here is bloody awful, but give it some irrigation and we’ll be planting strawberries any time soon. And the rockery - I’ve seen huge seams of ore down there in the mines, bigger than I’ve ever seen before. But everybody’s got their heads too tightly screwed into the sand, all too busy planting, growing, butchering, hunting, for a king that does not care.

What this place needs... is revolution. Alone I am worthless, but together, we have strength. Tomorrow I begin my first stint as overseer. Things are going to be a-changin’ around here.

[Bearskie]

Hey Quasar, just wanted to ask: do I need to trade away all our food or just the prepared meals?

[QuQuasar]

Just the meals. It would make it too difficult to find new crops if we had to trade away our seeds and fruit.

(I was actually doing it by searching for "roast" and "prepared", which also meant trading away meat and fish. I'd recommend that approach, if only because it's easy)

(Edit) Also: VIVE LA REVOLUTION!

[Taupe]

Nice update, Quasar, it's really cool to read about all the founders like that. Altho, we don't really like to talk about the hamsters. It's just... forget about it.

[QuQuasar]

Journal Entry - Quasar, Head Cook
         
Neblime has stepped down, leaving the position of overseer to Bearskie. An odd choice: the man has spent the last two years working the fields and generally keeps to himself. May is friends with him, but to be honest I always though he was somewhat... dull.
         
Well, far be it for me to question. Perhaps that unassuming exterior hides a mind as sharp as adamantine. Perhaps a term as overseer is exactly what Bearskie needs to demonstrate his true potential.
         
Or perhaps not. We'll see. So long as he does nothing to piss off the king and get us all hammered, I shall not object.
         
While I think of it, I should probably also ask him to see about roofing off the barracks, though. Neblime refused to do it last year, and Taupe has been giving all of us dirty looks every time he comes in soaking wet from training... which is pretty much every time he comes in from training. Turns out they call it a "rainforest" for a reason, heh.

Also, I suppose as Mayor I should request rooms befitting my status. It would not be appropriate to entertain liasons in the dining hall, nor to make the decisions of a governer in a small dirt bedroom.
         
I must remember I am no longer merely a common cook. The pride of the mayor is the pride of the town itself, so by extention the quality of the mayors residence is intrinsically related to the quality of the town. It is not selfish greed that insists I demand better quarters, but selfless devotion to Breadbowl itself!
         
I must suppress this mild sense of disgust I feel with myself and speak with Bearskie at once!

[Bearskie]

Mandate #1: Sort Your Shit Out

The People shall operate in an efficient and orderly manner, with proper usage of stockpiles. The People will specialise in their chosen professions, and no longer focus on a hundred different jobs per dwarf.



Incredible. Our entire industry is a complete mess.

There are dwarves literally idling blindly with zero labours. There are about three novice carpenters occupying the lone carpenter’s workshop, while Neblime’s already legendary +5. There are fisherdwarves everywhere, but nobody is cleaning all the fish so they’ve all been raw for the past TWO YEARS.

I had to sit the whole fortress down into the dining room to explain this to them. There was a whole lot of shouting, screaming, ax-throwing and table-flipping (primarily on my part). Particularly from those freeloaders and the Fisherdwarves Union members. Yet by the end of it all, we did manage to agree on a proper labour system.

- Proper food stockpiling, with only cookable ingredients being stored at the food prep area. Prepared meals and drinks are stored in the main cellars.
- Proper metal stockpiling, with ores being carted into the main area, while bars are stored in a freshly-dug cellar beneath.
- All fisherdwarves below adequate are now hereby sentenced to an eternity of fish cleaning, or at least until they become of further use elsewhere.
- All private hunting is now banned, with hunting now performed by the military.
- Specialization in labour duties, with only a select few being exempt from hauling labours.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Bearskie feels hopeful after considering the state of demands.

[Bearskie]

Mandate #2: Total Armament Project

The People should have the right and means to defend themselves when necessary. If the time comes, the People shall not walk into battle with their bare fists. This is not fisticuffs dammit.



This has been a project that I’ve been keen on ever since I became overseer. Working in the field for two years, I’ve had my fair share of close encounters. It’s time we got more than guard dogs for protection.

Ore are carted up from the mines below and deposited at the newly-revamped metalworking area. It is not long before the forges roar themselves to life, fuelled by the vast coal and lignite deposits beneath the earth.



The first batch of work chitties land on Hiddenleafguy’s table. Only when they have been signed and approved can our weaponsmith Dodok can commence full-scale production.



In the meantime, I had a slight argument with Quasar today about the necessity of bolts now that we have no hunters. Still she went on about resupplying our ammo caches and advanced preparation. It all quickly descended into an exchange of yells and hand-gestures... I guess we both left with a cloud over our heads, so to speak.

I felt pretty bad afterwards, so I did log in an order for two stacks of bolts. Poor gal’s been without an office for several months now. Maybe I'll do something about that.



Turns out Hiddenleafguy is the worst manager possible. For the whole month, he’s been spending his time outdoors looking at flowers, and ‘hasn’t had the time yet’ to manage the work orders.

Of course, I’m a reasonable dwarf. I burrowed him into his office and locked the door until he was done.



That delay aside, we're soon a veritable arms factory. This left me one last hurdle to my mandate – civilian uniform designations. The old uniform had to go; it was far too heavy and impractical. Civilians should have no business walking around in metal armor they don’t know how to use.



The new uniform is simple: weapon and shield; that is all. Our offense is our best defence. We’ll see which titan can withstand a hundred armed dwarves, inexperienced though they are. So ends the Total Armament Project.

Bearskie was jovial to have a mandate deadline met recently.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

((Because dwarves are idiots, the uniform initially caused them to run around butt-naked wielding only a weapon and shield. It’s also the rainy season. Yeah, so they were wet and naked. I've since fixed the issue by using the Over Clothing setting.))

[Hiddenleafguy]

When did I arrive?

Spoiler: 1st entry (click to show/hide)

Fuck the king, one mistake on my first job, and I am getting sent to some random farming fortress in the middle of fucking nowhere! The name of the fortress is "Breadbowl" I hope it burns before I get there.

[Bearskie]

20th Slate, the year 237. You were accompanied by your beautiful bone carver wife and, despite your advanced age, you two have a baby son. I mean, you're 131...

[Taupe]

20th Slate, the year 237. You were accompanied by your beautiful bone carver wife and, despite your advanced age, you two have a baby son. I mean, you're 131...

So he's not too lazy to fill work orders, just senile...

[SQman]

The journal of SQman, His Majesty's ace hunter.

Entry 1:
I have been supplying the Mountainhome with the finest meats I could find since the first strands of beard showed up on my face. The problem was, all there was left after years of exploitation was a flock of sparrows, a couple of emaciated mountain goats too dumb to seek more fertile earth, and those disgusting eel-like monsters, lampreys I think they're called. Don't make me start rambling about the sad looking livestock that had to live of hard mountain grass and disgusting cave fungus.
In his incomparable wisdom, His Majesty had sent me and my family to an outpost which he calls Breadbowl. My mission is to provide the people of the Mountainhome with new, exotic morsels, be it with a bolt or a tamer's whip.

Entry 2:
Bearskie, the dwarf who calls himself our overseer, has decided  that there is a need of improvements in the outpost's inner workings. I know it's for the sake of productivity, but try to guess what was the part of his mandate that affected me. Yes, he said that the hunting will be done by the military only.
What then? Will he send his beloved militia to harvest crops, because farmers can't do it well enough? Maybe he'll ask them to pick berries, because he thinks herbalists aren't trained to do their job?
I'd file a complaint to His Majesty, but with the stockpiling reform, there's no way to find a piece of paper or a chisel, because everything I can write on is currently being hauled or is yet to be found under a ton of trash. No, I'm not defacing my journal for that.

Scribbled on the side of the page is an image of an armored dwarf and a leopard in charcoal. The dwarf is wetting himself. The leopard is striking a menacing pose.
Scribbled on the side of the page is an image of SQman the dwarf and Bearskie the dwarf in charcoal. SQman is making a rude gesture. Bearskie is frowning

Spoiler: The images (click to show/hide)

I guess sorting labors out was necessary, but what does my dwarf do if hunting is banned? I'm sure he's not dissecting animals (that would be silly), and there was no mention of traps. Either way, good job so far.

[QuQuasar]

Working in the field for two years, I’ve had my fair share of close encounters.

Those caterpillars can be downright terrifying.

In the meantime, I had a slight argument with Quasar today about the necessity of bolts now that we have no hunters. Still he went on about resupplying our ammo caches and advanced preparation. It all quickly descended into an exchange of yells and hand-gestures... I guess we both left with a cloud over our heads, so to speak.

To be fair bolts we will need marksdwarves boltsbolts and lots of spare BOLTS for archery boltsboltsbolts training.

(also, 'she')

And finally, neat! You just solved a mystery I was having in parrallel-universe breadbowl. I couldn't work out why my second militia squad wouldn't wear metal armour. All the civilians were calling dibs on it! I could have sworn I originally designated the civvie uniform as leather-only.

[Taupe]

The captain was baffled. Apparently the rangers were pissed about the new mandates. ''The army gets to take our job, blah blah blah!'' Was it truly his fault if Bearskie decided it was safer to send trained fighters with some protection as a team against wildlife, instead of letting loose canons wearing a thong and a crossbow duel giant snakes?

He'd spent the last years in the rain, training without a roof, wearing metal, so this place would be safe. Had they simply looked at their defences, or rather the lack thereof? this was no mountainhome, with safe tunnels and fortified cliffside and chokepoints and higher ground. Breadbowl was a plain. Sure for now it was peaceful, but sooner or later, the goblins would trace the wagons full of food and figure out they were coming from somewhere. The legend of the dragon would keep them at bay for a time, but eventually they would get here. And on that day, he'd be here, spear in hand to drive them off. So when a new dude with a green hat and some feathers arrived and complained that the stupid military was stealing their job? yeah that pissed him off good.

Later that day, he'd talk with Bearskie, and the mayor individually. One of them was bound to accept the idea. the mayor did like bolts a lot, and bearskie had a plan to arm the common folks. If the rangers wanted to hunt so bad, they could simply form an organised band of marksdwarves under his supervision. Or take the bloody armor and train day and night in the pool they called a barrack if they preferred.

Speaking of Gwolfskie, his plans for an armed revolution was great, but he'd seen how green boys acted in their first real fights. they'd feel brave as a mob and swing their new swords around, until somebody they knew gets injured. then reality snaps in and chaos erupts. no, he was all in favor of more weapons rather than few, but he'd talk Bearskie or the next overseer about giving the folks some basic training. Have the peasants on rotation, training with him for a month here and there, maybe just ten of them at a time, until everyone knew which part was the blade.

He felt a bit stupid afterward, getting so infuriated about the ranger comment. In time they'd probably get along just fine...