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[Nirur Torir]

Granted, but all of the residents were safely evacuated to your state first. They severely tax the power grid, rendering your computer inoperable during daylight hours.

I wish for a pair of pet turtles for the limitless supply of shells.

[Phantom]

Granted. Unfortunately all the offspring they have become pets. Soon the fort is flooded with swarms of turtles.

I wish that I was stuck between those Spetsnaz Forces from S.T.A.L.K.E.R. and one of those anomalies from the same game. Please be more creative than "YOU DIE."

[dragnar]

Granted. Suddenly a portal opens up beneath you and drops you into an empty white room. A voice from nowhere says "Welcome to aperture science laboratories, you have been rescued from a dangerous combat situation so that...*static*... Do you like cake? I like cake."

I wish I had clothes that never needed washed and were immune to damage of any kind.

[Thedorfwhostoleyourcoffee]

Granted, the clothes feed off your life force to work.

I wish every wikia page I edit didn't remove my articles on møøses.

[Humaan]

Granted. They are not removed, but changed to be about llamas.

I wish that humans will finally discover interplanetary travel next year, with no consequence to Earth, its inhabitants, and its resources.

[cganya]

granted but it turns out all the planets we can visit are lifeless and boring.

I wish for a 50 pound ball of yarn.

[PTTG??]

Granted. Just wait until you see the kitten...

I wish that FATAL never existed.

[Cheddarius]

Granted; neither did you.

I wish Discovery Channel's awesome Awesome Sunday programming (Today, Origins of the Universe and some stuff by Stephen Hawking) was earlier so I could go to sleep earlier.

[Thedorfwhostoleyourcoffee]

Granted, but now it is on so early nobody watches it and it gets cancelled.

I wish I wasn't banned from 37 different wikia's for posting articles about mooses (That's true by the way).

[Caesar]

Granted, but the pages go offline permanently right after.

I wish that my Dwarf minions wouldn't trace snow all the way into my fortress.

[cganya]

Granted, now dwarves no longer know how to construct fortresses. They live among the trees in expertly made tree houses. By Armok! What have you done?!

I wish there were more weapon/research tiers in X-Com and that the aliens also did research and gradually improved.

[Greiger]

Granted, they track blood in instead.  Unfortunately the blood is a necrosis contact poison.  The blood makes it into the meeting area and everyone dies of rotting feet.

I wish my super soda wasn't flat.

Granted, there are now 10 times as much research.  Heavy plasma and blaster launchers still make it all useless though.

I wish my super soda wasn't flat.

[Humaan]

Granted, it is now sharp (music humor)


I wish that we finally found intelligent but friendly life in the universe.

[Ottofar]

Granted, but they couldn't travel in space, nor send any messages via any waves.

I wish a bugless v.31.xx was here

[Caesar]

It is, but unfortunately toady removed all features except for the music from the game to get rid of the bugs.

I wish for my doctors to amputate the feet of all my necrosis-infected dwarfs.