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[AzyWng]

An article called "High Hitler".

[Helgoland]

Relevant.

[Kot]

Spoiler: Polish concience (click to show/hide)

[Akura]

An article called "High Hitler".

I didn't really find the article especially funny, but that was definitely enlightening.

[hops]

Nothing will top Doctor Gay Hitler.

[Loud Whispers]

His plan was to write a novel, but with his first visit to the archives that changed completely. There he found the papers of Dr Theodor Morell, Hitler’s personal physician, previously only a minor character in most studies of the Führer.

Real life has always been better than fiction

[Furtuka]

Last night while doing assigned reading for my crusades class there was this one little saga detailed in the historical documents. So there's this guy called Peter Bartholomew who digs up what he claims is the Lance of Longigus after the siege of Antioch. Now it's all well and good and supposedly helps them win some battles, but as soon as it was dug up people started asking questions. Questions like, "Why does the lance look Seljuk, not Roman?", "Why was it in Antioch instead of Jerusalem?", "Wow Jesus was acting weirdly aggressive in those visions you described Peter, this doesn't sound quite right. And why did he tell you to start making these accusations of sin against your own very important and powerful allies?", and so on.

So eventually the crusaders come up with a test. Peter Batholomew has to walk through a huge fire carrying the lance, and if he comes out the other unscathed it'll be proof of his authenticity. So the time comes and it turns out that the guy actually manages to do it. Walks right through, and supposedly has no marks on his clothing or body other than some very small burns on his ankles.

But then the crowd of people get so excited and worked up that they start swarming him like groupies on a rockstar. They start tearing at his clothes, trying to get some holiness for themselves, and in the process trample him and actually wind up gouging wounds into his body and it goes until some buddies of his rescue him. He gets examined afterwards and they're like "eeyup, no burns", but then he dies three days later anyways since he got trampled so badly.

[TempAcc]

God murders in mysterious (and highly creative) ways.

Reminds me of this one thing I saw on bodica. At the time, there was this roman consul/general who was doing a pretty good job of stabilizing britain for the empire, and finally he decided to raid this one island considered sacred by most of the major tribes. So he goes there with several ships, expecting heavy resistance, but when they close into the shore, they see this eerie sight consisting of hundreds of druids dressed in all black robes, and a bunch of women in front of them, butt naked, carrying only torches.

The romans, being very supersticious, looked at all this and went "holy shit I dont want to get off this ship". So the general starts cursing at them and they finally land on the ship and start marching towards the tribals. So the women with torches charge at them while the druids put their hands to the sky and start chanting loudly, which makes the romans WTF even more, but doesn't stop them from murdering every woman and druid on the beach.

Turns out, however, not all of the women had died, and one of them, before dying, throw her torch at the pile of druid corpses. Thats when the romans realized that most of the beach was covered in a pitch like substance, including the druids, and it was all set ablaze. No romans were harmed, but they were now scared shitless. You see, the romans didn't believe only their gods existed, they believed a lot of other gods were just as real and that magic was certainly a thing, and they soon realized that this wasn't a battle, it was a ritual sacrifice, and they had just taken part in it.

Then, by sheer coincidence, boudica had already started her rebellion while they were away raiding the island, and several cities got fucked in the process, with even women and children and animals being killed. Not only that but a number of weird disasters started happening, like the statue of a certain roman consul simply falling over for no reason and stuff like that. The romans really did believe they were cursed and that they would all die horribly.

Rome came out on top later because boudica fucking sucked at strategy and her army consisted mostly of dweebs without real weapons or equipment, but hey, Rome took it all so seriously it later sent a much larger force to fully murderize anyone who didn't submit and stabilize the region.

[hector13]

Oh Sammy boy, you done and fucked it right good.

[Dozebôm Lolumzalìs]

"David Pakman, of the David Pakman Show (and who speaks like he always needs to blow his nose), hints at Bernie support while portraying Hillary negatively, where he shows his bias,[14] and calls the Best of Conservative politicians "the Best (Worst?)", indicating his negative bias toward Conservatives. David Pakman often pretends to be unbiased, but is, in fact, biased against Conservatives."

Never change, Conservapedia. (The funny part is how they throw insults in like they're talking to a friend. Come on, do you think that an encyclopedic tone is another Evil Liberal Invention?)

[hops]

They don't want to sound like a smart person because a smart person is libera.

[hector13]

Plenty of smart people are conservative.

[TempAcc]

They don't want to sound like a smart person because a smart person is libera.

Libra? No, libras are dweebs. Scorpio #1

[hops]

Plenty of smart people are conservative.

More like 'wise'

I'm talking more of an intellectualism thing here, not actual intelligence.

[hector13]

Scorpio? Sagittarius is where it's at min. License to shit in the street.