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[Rhaken]

There's a wee device made of wood opal in Tarmid's office that should be going ass-backwards berserk right now.

I'd write a post about it if I wasn't about to disappear from Internetland for about 24 hours.

[FallenAngel]

In an unrelated scenario, FallenAngel has switched from controlled pyrotechnics in his personal war on spiders to boot.
Yes, he's stepping on spiders.
And he's collecting their corpses and putting them into a bucket.

[Gnorm]

In an unrelated scenario, FallenAngel has switched from controlled pyrotechnics in his personal war on spiders to boot.
Yes, he's stepping on spiders.
And he's collecting their corpses and putting them into a bucket.

Why exactly does he wage war upon the spider?

[Deus Asmoth]

Because they're creepy stalkers who just keep following people around and won't stop looking at them! Or is that just me? Please say no...

[Gnorm]

Now that I think about it, is Barkov the only "ordinary" dwarf in the fort?

[danmanthedog]

Now that I think about it, is Barkov the only "ordinary" dwarf in the fort?

NAHHH he will be one of us soon. Yeah their are little to no rules for shamanism but my dwarf is very limited to what he can do, if I had more power I could be able to fuse two pest together but since I can't I just glue both of them together.

[TheFlame52]

Overseer's Log

We have over 2500 plants. It will be made into booze. Also, all melee squads are to start training. No, just because I carry an axe doesn't mean I'm in a squad. All new squads are told to train in the barracks because those particular orders haven't been changed since the founding of the fort.

The invaders still stand over the weaver's corpse. Also it is summer now. And the depressed farmer died. His dog will be left out a goblin bait.

The dog is thrown off the wall over the traps. A few seconds later, the trolls start moving. The goblins follow. The first goblin on the scene is the spearmaster, leader of the lashers. He steps on the traps, moving like greased lightning over many of them. He finally steps wrong and falls down almost the exact center of the drop pit. He falls for the cage traps and we now have two captive weapon lords.

Meanwhile, the dog charges out toward the goblins. He gets killed in seconds. Some lashers get shredded by the traps. One cripple falls and gets caught in a cage. The trolls run up and get shredded too. A dwarf fetching one of the caged prisoners sees a crippled and unconscious troll, and opens fire with a crossbow. The trolls are all dead now, and half the lashers retreat. The other half just stand around.

The last two squads of goblins, both spear, approach the traps. The elite bowman shoots up a pump operator who was up on the walls for some reason He looks pretty bad. And a speargoblin who fell with only bruises beats a legendary brewer within an inch of his life. Both then fell into cage traps. The brewer lost a hand. I fear he won't be brewing for a while. I forbid everything in the pit.

Since no one seems to be helping the poor pump operator, I personally go up on the wall to save her. The next few shots narrowly miss me. Never mind about saving her then. And she has an arrow in her heart, so she won't last long. Her husband is dead and her child was snatched. When she dies, I forbid her corpse and possessions. Nobody is going up on those walls.

The elite bowman finally falls for the traps, falls down, and gets caught in a cage. We are running out of cages. I send the military down into the pit to clean up the survivors. A couple of hunters open fire on the goblins in the pit before Artyom singlehandedly kills all of them. He is a badass. Not the rest of the siege is just standing there, just outside the gate. I order an cage built near the cage stockpile and all the wild animals put into it. That will free up a lot of cages.

Someone's pet goose flew up out of the drop pit. It is killed but prompts some movement from the goblins. Since there is no more threat from  ranged goblins, I order the marksdwarves up on the wall. The goblins retreat under the hail of bolts. All that are left now are the leftover lashers. Giving no ground, they are shot down like dogs.

The gates are opened and I send the military to mop up the last ones. Some of the marksdwarves run out in civilian uniform to shoot the goblins. Clothes are unforbidden, weapons marked for melting, corpses dumped, traps unclogged. The siege is broken. All is well.

((OOC: Barkhov is the only ordinary dwarf in the fort MY ASS!))

[FallenAngel]

In an unrelated scenario, FallenAngel has switched from controlled pyrotechnics in his personal war on spiders to boot.
Yes, he's stepping on spiders.
And he's collecting their corpses and putting them into a bucket.

Why exactly does he wage war upon the spider?

Can't have brown recluse spiders in your food stockpiles. Also they smell like burning coal when lit on fire.
And yes, Deus, that too. FallenAngel is serene in his strangeness.
Oh, and don't eat that biscuit. No, not that one. That one.

[MDFification]

Now that I think about it, is Barkov the only "ordinary" dwarf in the fort?

Ordinary dwarves risk life and limb to retrieve socks during the middle of the siege.
Barkov would probably be offended you assume he's that thick.

[TheFlame52]

Overseer's Log

Total Casualties:
2 dwarves
1 dog
1 puppy
1 rooster
1 goose

Total Prisoners
1 elite crossbowman (32 bolts remaining)
1 elite bowman (10 arrows remaining)
1 spearmaster
1 lasher
4 spearmen

I've created a stockpile in front of the smelters for goblin weapons and armor - that is, metal weapons and armor that are poorly crafted. Vlad mandated 2 war hammers, so I ordered our 2 worst hammers melted and I made new ones.

Hey look, migrants. a great trapper, a great doctor, a great milker, a peachick, a great presser, a great leatherworker, a tanner, a cavy pup, and a calf. An ok migrant wave.

I finally remembered to free that brewer from before from his cage. The dwarf who freed him takes him to the hospital, where he is treated by our excellent doctors. He cannot stand or grasp, and he has no working limbs. He also has sensor and motor nerve damage. I hope he is able to brew again someday.

Happiness check! The only unhappy people are a metalsmith who was tormented by that ghost from before, and... Vlad again. This time he's angry about Helgarde's tomb. I order some silver statues made for Vlad's tomb to replace the stone ones already in there. I'm not sucking up to the baron, I just like to make hammers, and it's in all our best interests to keep a well-trained militia member happy.

The human diplomat from Gil Kemus has arrived! Wasn't that the nation that we killed their law-giver? Well, this diplomat is the law-giver too, but he isn't a vampire so we're fine. The caravan arrives soon after and I close the inner gate and open the outer gate. There are probably some snatchers here, too, but they might not have come because of the siege. Apparently the path fro wagon is blocked by some track that doesn't appear to have a purpose, so I order two urists of it destroyed to let the wagons pass.

The metalsmith, who is still dangerously depressed, is assigned war dogs in the event of his berserkness. A kobold thief is discovered in the barracks, then shot to death. Another thief is discovered by the depot and is killed by the humans.

((OOC: What should I buy from the humans? Should I trade with them at all? Also, do you guys want me to build an arena for our prisoners?))

[MDFification]

You should buy literally everything made of iron or steel we can afford, then melt it. We have a boatload of adamantine already, but steel production is still worthwhile - ntm we can train our weapon/armorsmiths further before we try to fully equip the militia with adamantine gear.
Another piece of advice; designate a stockpile (without bins?) that only accepts metal crafts/weapons and armor the dwarves can't equip by the forges. That way, anything we should be melting is conveniently placed close to our smiths.

[Gnorm]

The dwarves do not negotiate with their enemies! Kill them all!

[Deus Asmoth]

Yeah, lots of steel is handy. I generally make shields out of steel instead of adamantine, since it makes shield bashes slightly more effective.

There isn't really much point in having an arena, since dwarves would just run away from it.

[Gnorm]

There isn't really much point in having an arena, since dwarves would just run away from it.

It's tradition. Forts have had arenas since the 2D-era, even if they were never actually used.

[TheFlame52]

I've created a stockpile in front of the smelters for goblin weapons and armor - that is, metal weapons and armor that are poorly crafted.

Another piece of advice; designate a stockpile (without bins?) that only accepts metal crafts/weapons and armor the dwarves can't equip by the forges. That way, anything we should be melting is conveniently placed close to our smiths.

Way ahead of you. I'll set it to accept metal crafts, toys, and arrows, too.