Sketch a picture of me to show Cyrydiad.
[6]
You spend a day drawing a picture. Then you realise he's inside your head and can't see it.
Once the suicide mission has wiped out the Zerg, return home. Find a new mount.
[4]
There are no more Zerg under your control, they're all independant hives now. You steal a shuttle and fly back home.
ME: * attempt to join adventuring party *
M'k, sounds reasonable. So what did the roll dictate?
(As people have said, bolding is good. The roll indicates if what you said happens, with a 5 meaning you succeed even if the odds are outrageous and a one meaning terrible things happen to you.)
[2]
As a ball of something black resembling a tumbleweed, you can't talk, and nudging into people just gets them to kick you.
battle ASSBUTT
dun-dum-dun-da-dun-dun-dun
[2]
He woops your ass. You pass out because don't ask questions (this has always bugged me) and wake up in one of the free Pokemon hospitals that dot the landscape, because the appropriate action if you see someone unconscious is to drag them to the nearest vet.
Teleport onto one of the harvester ships and kill all it's crew, then take it over. If I suceed, use my new ship to attack more of the harvester fleet. Afterwards attempt to figure out what the weakness of the fleet is.
[4]
Success! You take a one-kilometre corvette, light but fast. The ship isn't designed for taking heavy damage, so you surprise the fleet by exploding their weapons systems and then running away. As a fleet, their defenses are very solid. Their capital ship has amazing defenses and weapons, shredding anything that could get too close.
Wait for a critical oment, then launch a massive attack. Gain control over all of the Raptor's industries on order to strengthen the war effort.
[6]
The fleets are engaging now. Think
Star Wars but everyone isn't fucking all over the place. No, everyone's firing missiles, lasers and lumps of tungsten from a good distance. Both of the capital ships are releasing massive swarms of fighter-bombers, and the smaller ships are now in range for some of the heavier weapons to be used.
Now's your chance. You use the Protoss's tempests to shell the surface of the planet, and you deploy mixed Protoss and Raptor ground forces. A chosen drop shuttle has deployed one guy. He's currently stabbing Harvesters in the face with thousands of golden tendrils. Together, most of the enemy's ground infantry has been defeated. This prompts some of the Harvester fleet to come suss out the situation.
12 man council, and elections every 5 years. I am chairman.
[4]
4 years, and you have a deal.
"Please stop fighting on me..."
[6]
Now both of them are freaking out. You take the chance to escape to the men's bathroom, one of your few bastions.
Attempt to infect jailors/superhumans.
A potatoperson? Do I infect people by touch or some other process? What do I currently look like?
You spread by contact, but it takes awhile to set in. You're in the shape of a monkey. However, trying to convert another potato person into a potato infested potato person doesn't work so well.
[2]
None make contact with you. Damn.