Dear fucking lord you lot have been busy.
...Send them a potato.
-e
Also, put this on hold until humans have been pacified again.
Mutate and/or forcibly remove human anti-potato tech.
[3]
A stalemate: Humans are now holding the line against the more dangerous potatoes.
Go about getting ready for school. Try not to peak at the cat fight.
You are asking for it.
Peak. Honestly.
[3]
You need to get your clothes. From the bedroom. Great.
You try and sneak towards your clothes stockpile, averting your eyes from the ball of death. You turn around to get your clothes, go for the door, and now the ball of death is flying towards you.
Be the very best dapper dinosaur. Like no one ever was.
[5]
To be dapper is my test To drink tea is my cauuuseI will travel across the town, being dapper far and wideeach tuxedo to understand the power's thats insideGentlemen! Bowler cap and caneRolling around for classy gainGentlemen! Upper class and smooth
one day I'll be the dapperest toooooo!(This is my new favorite thing, better get lol'd at or "Smurfington The Third is throwing a tantrum")
Dimension Gate out of there and back onto earth, then ZA WARUDO
[6]
You ZA WARUDO yourself. PAIN
"This is it!!!!!!!! YOU BRING ANIME INTO THIS, IT IS TO JAPANY FOR MY TAISTS. IT IS ONLY GOOD FOR MASTURBASION. NOW HOW YOU LIKE WHAT WILL HAPPEN WITH YOUR PRESIOUS STUFF!!!!! HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
TURN ALL OF THE GM'S POTATOS INTO VODKA
Do this again
I will not fail
AGAIN
ONE MORE TIME
[1]
FAIL
Slowly expand my political base of power, promoting a policy of trade, prosperity for all, and Traditional ValuesTM.
Their culture is less than a year old, their species only has 1 generation so far. Raptorial values might be more convincing.
Send Helgoland's orbital colony to Proxima Centauri, to be a strategic outpost on the edge of this star system and a staging point for interstellar exploration.
[4]
Success! The colony is in place.
*Arrives in a puff of logic*
[2]
You arrive in a puff on rhetoric. IT BURNS
Think deeply about what to do, then roll for anal circumference.
[1]
Giving me a shot, eh? Well... TO THE POTATO DIMENSION WITH YOUScreech angrily and open a rift to who-fucking-knows-where.
[3]
Welcome to the place where I keep my cheese. Please go away.
Use my power to raise an army!
[5]
Your moneys gets you a big ass army.
IT HAS MECHS AAAAHH
Slowly expand my political base of power, promoting a policy of trade, prosperity for all, and Traditional ValuesTM.
Send Helgoland's orbital colony to Proxima Centauri, to be a strategic outpost on the edge of this star system and a staging point for interstellar exploration.
Embrace that move, show HugoLuman my full support in his wise decision. See to it that the colony becomes the stepping stone for Raptor expansion, thus earning me a lasting place in their history books.
[5]
The colony thrives! They declare you the first leader of the colony.
Sigh. Just leave and go somewhere safe. Recharge energy. Research a way to use psionics to tear holes in time in addition to space.
[3]
You're safe. You can't break time without breaking reality in this sucky universe.