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[GreatWyrmGold]

Be a literally gold dragon. Use high conductivity to divert electricity from Nazis.

[LordSlowpoke]

SECOND HOUR OF SIEGE

Call upon my divine tank crew to service the Goddess' mighty warmachine, once the tank is field-ready drill the crew extensively on proper M4 operations, then roll forth to obliterate the vile Nazi scum!

[5] THE SUSPENSION HAS BEEN FIXED WITH UTMOST PREJUDICE. [3] THE CREW IS AS MEDIOCRE AS VARIOUS PALADINS HAVING NO IDEA HOW TO WORK A TANK ARE, BUT THEY REMEMBER A FEW KEY CONCEPTS. [6] YOU CRASH THROUGH THE MAIN GATE AND POINT THE MAIN GUN AT THE INVADING NAZI! [3v1] THE NAZI EXPLODE IN A SHOWER OF GORE! THERE ARE MORE NAZI REMAINING! [4] THEY IGNORE THE TANK, DISMOUNT FROM THE TRAMPOLINES AND RUSH INTO THE TOWN! THE ALARM BELL RINGS!

RESPAWN AND SEARCH FOR THAT GUN THAT KILLED ME! WE HAVE A... CONVERSATION TO HOLD!

[5] YOU SUCCESSFULLY RESPAWN AT THE NEAREST SHRINE. [6] NOTING THAT THE MAIN GATE IS CURRENTLY BLOCKED BY A TANK AND THE FLOODING IN ELECTRIC NAZI, YOU OPEN A SIDE GATE AND MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE OUTER ELECTRIC NAZI CAMP. YOU FIND THE CONVERSATION WITH THE GUNELECTRICNAZIS SOMEWHAT PLEASANT, THOUGH THEIR ACCENTS ARE RATHER THICK.

SLOWLY INCREASING THE HEIGHT THEY REICH.

Fix'd.

SELL ALL THE THINGS AT HUGE PROFITS!

[4] YOU MANAGE TO SELL THINGS AT A [420]% MARGIN! THE GUNS IN YOUR INVENTORY DISAPPEAR MYSTERIOUSLY.

WILL THE POTATO IN THE POND TO TURN INTO A WATER-POTATO GOLEM

[5] THROUGH THE POWER OF DIVINE WIZARDRY, A GOLEM OF [3] POTATO SOUP IS MADE! [3] IT PROCEEDS TO BEING CONFUSED ABOUT ITS EXISTENCE AND PHYSICAL IMPLICATIONS THEREOF.

Share pizza with my dog, Harry.

Drink liquor. Eat pizza. Grab my *insert stereotypically gun thing here* in case things go downhill.

[3] DOG ESTABLISHED. [1] YOU EAT THE MALT LIQUOR AND DRINK THE PIZZA. GLASS SHARDS ARE DELICIOUS. [6] YOU GRAB THE GUNS. YOU GRAB ALL THE GUNS. THE TOWN IS MORE OR LESS DEPRIVED OF RANGED WEAPONRY. YOU STILL HAVE THE GUNS.

OBTAIN ANTI-NAZI BOXING GLOVES

[4] YOURS ARE THE GLOVES WHICH WILL PUNCH THE NAZIS!

Be a literally gold dragon. Use high conductivity to divert electricity from Nazis.

[1] THE ELECTRIC NAZI ARE DEPRIVED OF ELECTRICITY! THE ELECTRICITY IS TRANSPORTED TO YOU VIA AIR! THE ARCS PERFORM A MAJESTIC DISPLAY OF ARC WELDING, AND SOON ENOUGH YOU MELT IN HORRIBLE PAIN! ALSO, THE NAZI SOON ENOUGH REGAIN THEIR ELECTRICITY, RETURNING TO BEING THE ELECTRIC NAZI. [1] THEY ALSO BEGIN WEARING FARADAY CAGES. RESPAWN?

ELECTRIC NAZI STATUS: POURING INTO TOWN

[TCM]

SHOOT EVERY GUN AT NAZIS.

DRINK MORE PIZZA.

[Grahamagara]

Join Nazi. Attack closest former ally with musical.

[Errol]

FIND NAZI BLITZ ENGINE. EAT IT.

[Remuthra]

Offer to sell people buckets so they can bail out the stuff the Electric Nazi are pouring into the town.

[poketwo]

CREATE COMUNIST REVOLUTION!!!!

[NullForceOmega]

Personally man cupola machine gun, rain death on pathetic Nazi.  Order driver to full reverse, crush the Nazi beneath the steel tracks of the goddess' wrath!

[Krath]

PENETRATE ELECTRIC NAZIS

WITH FISTS

[GreatWyrmGold]

Dangit.

Respawn as Thomas Edison and explain how that process is horribly inefficient, how the Faraday cages prevent their own devices from getting electricity, and how they totally ripped off Tesla.

[Harry Baldman]

Remove electric nazi bones. Bury them.

[Avis-Mergulus]

Locate nearest Red Army recruitment point and lie about my age to sign up. Obtain Mosin rifle and cloak. If no recruitment point is available, join the partisans. Obtain double-barrel shotgun and ushanka hat.
E: tyop feex

[BeruangSarkis]

BUILD A TESLA COIL. FIGHT ELECTRIC NAZIS.
WITH ELECTRICITY.

[DarkArtemisFowl]

BURST THROUGH THE BARRICADE OPPOSITE THE NAZI ON MY WAR GIANT TIGER, M14 RIFLE M1 GARAND, AND SHEATHED MAMELUKE SWORD. YELL BATTLE CRY AND SHOOT EXPLODING RUBBER PELLETS AT NAZI.

[LordSlowpoke]

THIRD HOUR OF SIEGE

SHOOT EVERY GUN AT NAZIS.

DRINK MORE PIZZA.

[1] THE PILE OF GUNS IGNITES AND EXPLODES IN A WONDERFUL DISPLAY OF FIREWORKS. ALSO, YOUR PIZZA SOLIDIFIES. THIS KILLS YOU. RESPAWN?

Join Nazi. Attack closest former ally with musical.

[2] THE GUNELECTRICNAZI, WHOSE NAME YOU LEARN TO BE WILHELM, CLAIMS TO BE UNABLE TO HELP YOU AND SENDS YOU OFF TO THE RECRUITMENTELECTRICNAZI. [2] UPON HEARING YOU'RE NOT FROM THE EMPIRE OF THE FIFTY THOUSAND WOOLEN MAMMOTHS OF THE SEVEN WINDS COMPOUNDED, YOU'RE GIVEN A SMALL PLUSH TOY OF A FROG, A GOLDEN STICKER WITH "YOU TRIED" WRITTEN ON IT, A PAT ON THE BACK AND LEFT AS YOU WERE.

FIND NAZI BLITZ ENGINE. EAT IT.

[6] YOU FIND THE NAZI BLITZ ENGINE AND CONSUME IT. THROUGH THIS ACT, YOU HAVE BECOME THE NAZI BLITZ ENGINE YOURSELF. THE ELECTRIC NAZI CHEER THIS TURN OF EVENTS.

Offer to sell people buckets so they can bail out the stuff the Electric Nazi are pouring into the town.

[1] THE ELECTRIC NAZI FIND YOUR STALL, PURCHASE YOUR BUCKETS AND USE THEM TO CREATE A CANNON WHICH EXPLOSIVELY POURS YOU OUT OF TOWN. THIS KILLS YOU. RESPAWN?

CREATE COMUNIST REVOLUTION!!!!

[6] YOU APPROACH A GROUP OF ASSORTED PAGES.

"HEY KIDS. WANNA BUILD COMMUNISM?"

HALF AN HOUR LATER YOU'VE GOT A RESPECTABLE GROUP OF SWORDSMEN, AXEMEN AND LIGHT CAVALRY. NOBODY SUSPECTS A THING. EXCEPT FOR SAVRTIA. THAT'S DISAPPROVAL RIGHT THERE.

Personally man cupola machine gun, rain death on pathetic Nazi.  Order driver to full reverse, crush the Nazi beneath the steel tracks of the goddess' wrath!

[3, 1] THE NAZIS PRACTICALLY RUN INTO YOUR BULLETS AS YOUR TANK GOES INTO REVERSE AND [1] RUNS STRAIGHT INTO A STEALTHILY PLANTED ANTI-TANK MINE! THE TANK EXPLODES! THE NAZIS EXPLODE! PICK ONE OF THESE WHICH KILLS YOU. RESPAWN?

PENETRATE ELECTRIC NAZIS

WITH FISTS

[2] YOU PUNCH AN ELECTRIC NAZI IN THE FACE. THIS SHOCKS YOU. YOU HAVE GRABBED THE ELECTRIC NAZI'S FULL ATTENTION.

Dangit.

Respawn as Thomas Edison and explain how that process is horribly inefficient, how the Faraday cages prevent their own devices from getting electricity, and how they totally ripped off Tesla.

[5] YOU RESPAWN AS THOMAS EDISON IN THE NEAREST SHRINE. [4] THE ELECTRIC NAZI CEASE THEIR ONSLAUGHT AND ENGAGE IN UNCOMFORTABLE SILENCE, THEN MURMURING. [6] A FEW FIGURES RUN BACK TO THE BASE CAMP AND AFTER A COUPLE MINUTES OF IMPROMPTU CEASEFIRE, AN ARTILLERY DROPPOD LANDS BETWEEN YOU AND THE ELECTRIC NAZI HORDES, CYBORG TESLA DISEMBARKING FROM IT. AN OFFICER RUNS UP TO YOU AND INFORMS YOU THAT SINCE THEY HAVE TESLA ENLISTED, THEY AREN'T REALLY RIPPING HIM OFF, AND DISAPPEARS MYSTERIOUSLY. YOU STARE EACH OTHER DOWN, UNSURE ON HOW TO PROCEED.

Remove electric nazi bones. Bury them.

[5] THE BONES OF ELECTRIC NAZI ARE REMOVED FROM THEIR PREMISES AND INSERTED INTO THE GROUND. THIS KILLS THE NAZIS. LIGHTTREE STALKS BEGIN SPROUTING WHERE THEY ARE BURIED.

Locate nearest Red Army recruitment point and lie about my age to sign up. Obtain Mosin rifle and cloak. If no recruitment point is available, join the partisans. Obtain double-barrel shotgun and ushanka hat.
E: tyop feex

[3] YOU LEARN OF THE LOCATION OF THE COMMUNIST GUERRILLAS FROM A PASSING GUARDSMAN. [5] YOU JOIN THEIR FORCES AND OBTAIN EQUIPMENT SUCCESSFULLY.

BUILD A TESLA COIL. FIGHT ELECTRIC NAZIS.
WITH ELECTRICITY.

[1] CYBORG TESLA CATCHES YOUR COIL WITH THE CORNER OF HIS EYE AND SHOOTS LIGHTING BOLTS FROM HIS HANDS, KILLING YOU INSTANTLY. HE ALSO LAUGHS AT YOUR INEFFICIENT CONSTRUCTION METHODS. RESPAWN?

BURST THROUGH THE BARRICADE OPPOSITE THE NAZI ON MY WAR GIANT TIGER, M14 RIFLE M1 GARAND, AND SHEATHED MAMELUKE SWORD. YELL BATTLE CRY AND SHOOT EXPLODING RUBBER PELLETS AT NAZI.

[5] YOU TEAR YET ANOTHER HOLE IN THE TOWN'S DEFENSIVE WALLS AND [3] SHOUTING "WE NEED A SLOGAN!" START THINNING DOWN THE ELECTRIC NAZI BACK LINE WITH EXPLOSIONS.

Spoiler: PALADINS OF TACTICAL LIMBO OF MIGHT AND MAGIC (click to show/hide)

TCM: EXPLODING LIKE IT'S SEEST IN 2004
Harry Baldman: SUCH BURY, WOW
NullForceOmega: THE PALADIN THE TOWN NEEDS, BUT DOESN'T DESERVE
Remuthra: WONDERING IF THAT CANNON CAN BE SOLD AT A PROFIT TOO
Grahamagara: ATTEMPTING COLLABORATION
Objective: SOUP GOLEM AFICIONADO
Krath: REPRODUCING MIKE TYSON'S PUNCH-OUT
GreatWyrmGold: DOING THOMAS EDISON THINGS
BeruangSarkis: PUTTING UP A SMITING CONCENTRATOR
DarkArtemisFowl: DESTROYING WHATEVER THIS TOWN HAD LEFT OF SECURE WALLS
POTATO SOUP GOLEM
??­??

Spoiler: YET UNNAMED COMMUNIST UPRISING (click to show/hide)

poketwo: EARNING THE SCORN OF A GODDESS THROUGH ACTS VARIOUS
Avis-Mergulus: INITIALIZING UPRISING WORKS
~150 VARIOUS COMBATANTS

Spoiler: THE ELECTRIC NAZI EMPIRE OF FIFTY THOUSAND WOOLEN MAMMOTHS OF THE SEVEN WINDS COMPOUNDED (click to show/hide)

Errol: THE NAZI BLITZ ENGINE
UNTEROFFIZIER WILHELM POELZ
CYBORG TESLA
??­??

ELECTRIC NAZI STATUS: SHOWDOWN MODE ACTIVE

SENSE ROLL: [3] YOU HEAR FAINT THUMPING IN THE DISTANCE.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

goddamnit forums i told you not to use emoticons now i had to magic these ??s up

bwuh.

also no this one is not dying yet sorry