Initiate communication with heavily-armed ship. Try to find out what's what.
You attempt to open communications. It fires its guns at your position. [2] And their shots go wild. They killed the waffle maker. Again.
Clean paint space bugs off the hull of the ship as I wait for it to come in range. If it does, shoot it with caustic cleaning chemicals.
Follow janitor out to the hull and prepare to board
Lead the marines in a glorious head on assault! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!!
It is time for an EPIC SPACE LEAP!
Leap onto the enemy ship, tear it apart.
The ship doesn't come within range of the chemicals, it just sits there, presumably waiting for its cannons to be reloaded. Meanwhile HALF THE FREAKING CREW don space suits/power armor and head out to the hull. As the ship isn't in safe jumping range, they just kind of stand there, except for Dan the Killbot, who makes a crazy robo jump and [5] FUCKING NAILS IT. I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT, I WAS ALL PREPARED TO HAVE YOU FLY OFF INTO SPACE. Anyway he then [6] PUNCHES A HOLE IN THE SHIP AND FIRES HIS NUKE LAUNCHER INTO IT. This has the effect of utterly destroying that piece of the ship, but it also throws Danbot [5] back to The Glorious Unicorn. Damn man, fuck Eurodance, we now have a Killbot.
FIRE THE AI CANNON AT IT!
Do not attempt to order me around human. I only shoot things because I like shooting things, I would shoot you too if you stood in front of the cannon. Anyway, firing main cannon.Using the chaos caused by Danbots craziness, the Main Cannon is fired [2] and misses completely.
Continue weapons project. Send the result to attack the enemy ship.
[4] You manage to adapt the spacegimp suit for the dolphin, and you even manage to get all the weapon upgrades put on him. However after being shoved out to the hull it attempts to rape the first redshirt it sees. [1] However the gimpsuits spaceworthiness prevents that kind of thing, leaving the Dolphin with Blue Balls. Poor little Rapey Dolphin.
After checking my weapon and suit I go find my ship and preflight check it
Everything looks in order.
Make Fleshbeast Abominations.
Teleport those Fleshbeast Abominations onto the bridge of the enemy ship.
Watch the resulting entertaining slaughter.
Also modify the Marine template to include natural weapons and shit.
Claws, acid blood, shit like that.
We have no teleportation technology. Well aside from the thing that teleports you to an empty universe. [2] Also you don't manage to do anything with the marine template. Humans are weird apparently.
SEND IN THE MARINES!!!!! Also, CLONE MORE MARINES!!!!
They are all on the hull. Also NO MORE CLONING IN COMBAT. That's DR's job
Author
Topic: The Glorious Unicorn: LARGE SUPASHIP APPROACHING, CURBS MURDER POTENTIALLY. (Read 66715 times)