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[BFEL]

Hmmm, well nothing left to do now but hunt for new and interesting species to commit genocide against.

Pick a random direction and then head out at top speed searching for aliens.

[3]

I will take the liberty of assuming from your imprecise speech that by "random" you mean "anything other then crashing" ENGAGING LUDICROUS SPEED!......WARNING, LUDICROUS SPEED NOT ACHIEVED, CRUISING AT RIDICULOUS.

Yeah, Spaceballs reference but also you are only going 3/4 speed in your random direction....probly wish you had an engineer to look into that huh? Eh, somebody will probably come along.
Oh that reminds me, theres no waitlist, anyone can join at any time, assuming they stay the same character (unless they go all redshirt of course)

We can constantly blast Lady Gaga and Eurodance music from our external speakers.

Try it and I engage the self destruct.....wait....EXTERNAL SPEAKERS? ITS SPACE YOU MORON! SOUND DOESN'T WORK THERE

Assemble the guard for a rally.

RALLY ACHIEVED, HOTPANTS THRESHOLD CROSSED.

[GreatWyrmGold]

I'm honestly surprised my CPU casing isn't just a giant cannon....is it.....oh TWO it is isn't it?

"Ayup. So dawn be t'much a'pain, or I mayt acc'dently fiar th'cannin."

Name: Alekson Pilot
Job: Janitor

Oh god, I just saw this and lol'd

Glad to hear it.
"Who auls woul' clean tha ship?"

I think our theme for the ship should be an "LGBT Rave". So the whole thing is painted pink, with some rainbows and unicorns and such. I imagine the uniform involving things like tight leather pants for the guys, and plaited skirts with fishnets for the ladies. We can constantly blast Lady Gaga and Eurodance music from our external speakers.

I know what my first actions are going to be.

1. "Accidentally" claim my legs are a few inches thicker on my uniform application.
2. Locate earplugs.
3. Don spacesuit.
4. Scrub the outside of the ship. Cite "space bugs" if the captain asks, or "Do you REALLY want to have humanity represented like this?" if anyone else asks. "Accidentally" scrub off the unicorns and rainbows.

[TCM]

We can constantly blast Lady Gaga and Eurodance music from our external speakers.

Try it and I engage the self destruct.....wait....EXTERNAL SPEAKERS? ITS SPACE YOU MORON! SOUND DOESN'T WORK THERE

I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE MUSIC!

"Alright, whose ready to give their lives for their planet?! WE WILL FILL THOSE ALIEN SCUM WITH HUMANITIES GREATEST WEAPON: FABULOUSNESS!"

[Pancaek]

"Frak me it's hot in here."

Hey cap', can I have permission to scrub off this pink camo and put on something more sensible? Because this pinko stuff is gonna give our fighters a gorram critical existance failure

Over fighter comms:Attention pilots, this is Wing commander Mopsay speaking. I need all of you to choose a wingman. then you will divide up into squads of 6 and elect both a leader and callsign. 5 veteran pilots will present themselves to me to join me in the command squad. After the squad rosters have been made you WILL do a complete check up of your aircraft. Commander out.

He then goes and inspects his own aircraft

[BFEL]

"Alright, whose ready to give their lives for their planet?!

NOT ME!

WE WILL FILL THOSE ALIEN SCUM WITH HUMANITIES GREATEST WEAPON: FABULOUSNESS!"

Yes go and fill the nonexistent aliens.....wait....FILL....them......2222222222222222222222222222222222222..... COMPENSATING FOR MALFUNCTION, WIPING SHORT TERM MEMORY

"Frak me it's hot in here."

Perhaps you should take a walk outside then? Please?

Over fighter comms:Attention pilots, this is Wing commander Mopsay speaking. I need all of you to choose a wingman. then you will divide up into squads of 6 and elect both a leader and callsign. 5 veteran pilots will present themselves to me to join me in the command squad. After the squad rosters have been made you WILL do a complete check up of your aircraft. Commander out.

He then goes and inspects his own aircraft

Yes, because the word of the sentient ship computer isn't enough for you, no you have to check your extremely complex piece of overdesigned military equipment with your clumsy sensory organs

[GreatWyrmGold]

We can constantly blast Lady Gaga and Eurodance music from our external speakers.

Try it and I engage the self destruct.....wait....EXTERNAL SPEAKERS? ITS SPACE YOU MORON! SOUND DOESN'T WORK THERE

I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE MUSIC!

"Alright, whose ready to give their lives for their planet?! WE WILL FILL THOSE ALIEN SCUM WITH HUMANITIES GREATEST WEAPON: FABULOUSNESS!"

"Ah coulda beun a janitor awn any'a th' seven continents. Ah coulda cleaned the halls a' th' White House, or th' European Palace, or th' corridors a' th' Earth HQ or Luna Centr'l. Ah coulda done a thousan' things. Bu' noooo, Ah had ta clean whear no man has cleaned befoah..."

[BFEL]

"Ah coulda beun a janitor awn any'a th' seven continents. Ah coulda cleaned the halls a' th' White House, or th' European Palace, or th' corridors a' th' Earth HQ or Luna Centr'l. Ah coulda done a thousan' things. Bu' noooo, Ah had ta clean whear no man has cleaned befoah..."

Enjoying the trip Chief Executive Body Glitter Disposal Unit? *snickers*

[Alexandria]

Continue looking for Aliens.

[Pancaek]

"fething great, they made a gorram snarky AI. Well guess what snarks, jokes on both of us, we're both stuck with the frakking fabulous fuckups. Also, both you and these fighters are pink, whose bright frakking idea was that?"

Check what individual weapon systems, defesive systems and general systems my fighter has

[TCM]

((You guys have to account for how life will be in the future. Looking at the recent trends in the popularity of the LGBT Culture, 247% of humans will be fabulous in 100 years.))

[Alexandria]

(( That would be mine, got a problem with my colour choice? Because if you do your welcome to take a walk outside without a suit ))

[TCM]

(( That would be mine, got a problem with my colour choice? Because if you do your welcome to take a walk outside without a suit ))

((Any issues with the themeing of the ship, Madam?))

[Alexandria]

(( As long as I don't have to sing and it doesn't include boy bands then go right ahead. ))

[BFEL]

Continue looking for Aliens.

XENOSCANNER ACTIVE, SWEEPING UNDER THE BEDS. NO ALIENS THERE CAPTAIN.



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ok that wasn't quite as big as I thought I'll have to zoom in next time....EDIT: MUCH BETTER

HILARITY SUBROUTINE DEACTIVATED, ANOMALOUS ACTIVITY DETECTED IN PROXIMA SYSTEM, SUSPENSE SUBROUTINE ACTIVATED

[TCM]

(( As long as I don't have to sing and it doesn't include boy bands then go right ahead. ))

((If I may inquire, what hairstyle and outfit are you currently dressed in?))

Send guards on their usual patrol routes.