:
"Oh, I think I may settle this."Toadsworth nods toward Ochita and Boothany. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a large scroll that could not possibly fit in there - or anywhere, for that matter, given his stature. He tips his spectacles and rolls it out in front of the group.
:
"Here we go, lads. The Extra-military Provisionary Treatise for Proper Handling of Independent Nations (Excepting Head-stomping). Originally drafted in 987 A.F. during the second Mario Kart Grand Prix, just before Mario raced Bowser at Yoshi Falls.":
"Oh, good times. I still remember that funny blonde-haired guy giving us the middle glove compartment right before I sent him sailing off the side. Don't ya get nostalgic for those days once in a while, Mario?":
"Wah-hoo!":
"The Treatise sets terms such that, in an ambiguous political situation involving independent nations coughkoopakingdomcough, wartime alterations to legal subsidiaries will be frozen like a Freezy so as to, quote unquote, 'keep those jerkface meanies in Rogueport outta here.' Instead, chain of command will temporarily restructure dependent on which figures are most likely to be present in the castle at any given time. This sets the succession as follows:
Princess Peach Toadstool
Commander Glendale Toadsworth-":
"Your name is Glendale? GWAHAHAHAHAH!":
"Pardon, King, but I find that very rude! It was my uncle's name, passed on to me when they first found me as a wee sprout in the Royal Garden.":
"Oh, no. If we get into Toad reproduction again-":
"-ANYWAY, the list goes on for some time. Er, Luigi, I'm sorry to say you seem to be several spots below Mario on here. Between you, we have Military Technodeveloper E. Gadd and - Tayce. T, the Royal Chef!? Er, perhaps this treatise might not be fully appropriate for the situation at hand. I must have signed in a drunken stupor after a wild night at the Pink Piranha Plant."Toadsworth backs up and the Mario Brothers raise their fists.
"No. He's not getting this castle. Now let's go beat him up. My purse needs replacing."
:
"I agree with Teressa, anyway. This is a wartime scenario, and it should be handled properly. So, er, everyone stand and cheer as Mario and Luigi do their thing."Mario and Luigi run up to Bowser and start pummeling him with their usual fist-stomps, woo-hoos and wah-hahs. The King himself merely frowns and raised his palm to cover his face. Inezach slowly sneaks up around where Mario was as Teressa slings threats at the King.
The plumber-in-red jumps back and charges up a fireball. The flame grows stronger and stronger as he focuses, but Bowser does nothing to interfere, merely closing his eyes and moving his mouth in silence. Just as Mario prepares to throw the flame, however, something historical takes place.
:
"So-long, a-Bowser!":
"Not so fast.":
"Power of the Shimmering Star: Starburst!":
"Wa-wa-wa!"A great, shimmering rainbow star materializes above Bowser, and the entire Royal Guard is knocked back as they watch a flash of light spread out from Bowser's position at breakneck speed, throwing Mario and Luigi off the castle roof and into the night sky below. Toadsworth is speechless.
Bowser looks at the Royal Guard and makes a "come" gesture with his hand.
:
"Trash the treaties, the scribes, the wartime and peacetime. I'm feeling charitable today. You pipsqueaks just witnessed the legendary, manly potential of the Power Star that crashed here headfirst minutes ago. It's just like I read in the Prophecy Times during breakfast yesterday morning: a being so full of magic that past kingdoms, ones before our time, wasted millions of lives just for a glimpse of its fiery Star Power."He laughs. It's the single most sinister laugh some of the Guard have ever heard.
:
"GWAAAAAAAAAH-HAH-HAH-HAAAAAH! Here's your choice: join me in the construction and reign of New Koopa Kingdom and I'll make you all my top military commanders. Except 'Worth, of course. He'll be my top janitor. If you refuse, well, uh. I haven't really tested this with my fire breath, but I'm sure it's even flamier now. Fierier. Fire-er."