Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Loud Whispers]

Xi Jinping claims the heavenly mandate, declares himself Founding Emperor of the Xi dynasty. Era of unlimited power and prosperity declared, Taiwan officially declared #2 by mainland government.

In related news: Has crossposting gone too far

[Teneb]

Xi Jinping claims the heavenly mandate, declares himself Founding Emperor of the Xi dynasty. Era of unlimited power and prosperity declared, Taiwan officially declared #2 by mainland government.

In related news: Has crossposting gone too far

The People's Heavenly Empire of Xi is, and has always been, a Loyal And Protective Friend to the Great And Just Democratic People's Republic of Korea, the Only True Korea, not to be confused with the Capitalist Pig-Dogs of the south, Slaves To Foreign Oligarchs.

[smjjames]

I guess it depends on whether he goes the Mao route of unquestioned decisions with absolute control or he goes a bit more the route of ruler with trusted advisors who can question him and we’ll, you know, actually advise.

[Loud Whispers]

I guess it depends on whether he goes the Mao route of unquestioned decisions with absolute control or he goes a bit more the route of ruler with trusted advisors who can question him and we’ll, you know, actually advise.

“When you are surrounded by sycophants, yes men, people who are too afraid to tell you what they really think, then there is a risk that the leader makes bad decisions,” she said.

“I’m not saying that we are going to have a famine like the Great Leap Forward or that China is going to turn into chaos like the Cultural Revolution. But … already there are some bad decisions being made.”

Uh oh spagetios

[Teneb]

Breaking news: Glorious Leader Kim Jong-un and Father of the People Kim Jong-il were secretly Brazilian all along!

Their real names have been revealed as, respectively, Josef Pwag and Ijong Tchoi.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Huh. Kim Jong-un's looks decently like him - but then, a lot of people look like each other. Oh well, it's no weirder than normal.

[smjjames]

China seems like a more logical place for them to seek refuge than Brazil or Japan (as was mentioned elsewhere) since they'd be pretty safe in China unless they did something that really pissed off the Chinese.

Offhand though, it does remind me a bit of when people were thinking Ghaddafi had maybe run to Brazil, which made him release a video saying in effect "Yo! I'm still here in Libya and ain't going anywhere!"

[Teneb]

China seems like a more logical place for them to seek refuge than Brazil or Japan (as was mentioned elsewhere) since they'd be pretty safe in China unless they did something that really pissed off the Chinese.

Offhand though, it does remind me a bit of when people were thinking Ghaddafi had maybe run to Brazil, which made him release a video saying in effect "Yo! I'm still here in Libya and ain't going anywhere!"

The article does mention (and a quick search by me confirms it) that prior to 2006 it was hilariously easy to get a fake brasilian visa, which, in turn, allowed you to go to most of the world.

As for China, I think it'd be the one place the Kims can run to without fake ids.

[Starver]

It's likely that they didn't just get a fake Brazilian passport, each. Eggs and baskets.

They may have avoided getting anything Fake Chinese (at least not to piss off a direct ally, possibly also less easy than other places) but I imaginesome sort of Bourne Identity lockbox in a convenient location (or across more than one, again to increase the basket-count) brimming with multiple forms of alternate id, etc.

[Loud Whispers]

China seems like a more logical place for them to seek refuge than Brazil or Japan (as was mentioned elsewhere) since they'd be pretty safe in China unless they did something that really pissed off the Chinese.

I doubt they're all that safe in China in the event of an ousting. The likelihood of China using the Kims as a bargaining chip to the UN would be pretty likely if they had no control over NKorea and weren't useful to China anymore

Offhand though, it does remind me a bit of when people were thinking Ghaddafi had maybe run to Brazil, which made him release a video saying in effect "Yo! I'm still here in Libya and ain't going anywhere!"

I swear the Americans do that in order to make their targets go out in the open and reveal they're still alive in order to better plan the next strike?

[Hanslanda]

Americans: We're a devious, violently insane, murderous group of gun and bomb obsessed manipulatory hegemonists. Everyone should be afraid of the tinpot dictator with one nuke and a starving, ill supplied army/nation though.

 

[Loud Whispers]

Americans: We're a devious, violently insane, murderous group of gun and bomb obsessed manipulatory hegemonists. Everyone should be afraid of the tinpot dictator with one nuke and a starving, ill supplied army/nation though.

 

Same way you'd be more comfortable around a pack of disciplined war dogs than sit around with a single starving stray. The desperation of the mangy dog would drive it to make mad decisions, even picking fights which would result in its own destruction - but not before it could give everyone around it rabies and shit

[Hanslanda]

I was being facetious. My country terrifies me but no more so than any other large country with nukes. Your analogy is apt. DPRK is dangerous because they know their geopolitical strength is weak and there is significant international pressure on them, plus they must maintain the illusion to their people of strength. Between a rock and a hard place, with a hand grenade and a crazy look in their eye.

[Loud Whispers]

I was being facetious. My country terrifies me but no more so than any other large country with nukes. Your analogy is apt. DPRK is dangerous because they know their geopolitical strength is weak and there is significant international pressure on them, plus they must maintain the illusion to their people of strength. Between a rock and a hard place, with a hand grenade and a crazy look in their eye.

"I swear I'll do it! I swear I'll do it!" Says Kim. Unbeknownst to all, he has already pulled the pin, but the grenade is defective.

[bloop_bleep]

I was being facetious. My country terrifies me but no more so than any other large country with nukes. Your analogy is apt. DPRK is dangerous because they know their geopolitical strength is weak and there is significant international pressure on them, plus they must maintain the illusion to their people of strength. Between a rock and a hard place, with a hand grenade and a crazy look in their eye.

"I swear I'll do it! I swear I'll do it!" Says Kim. Unbeknownst to all, he has already pulled the pin, but the grenade is defective.

Won't be defective in a couple more years. We have to start accepting the reality that pretty soon North Korea will have the ability to wipe a decent chunk of people off the face of the earth.

Though, I have recently read an article (I think it was in The Economist?) about how North Korea, having made significant progress in its nuclear program, now wants to be respected as a responsible nuclear state rather than a rogue nation that threatens everything it sees. Deciding to send athletes to the Winter Olympics was one of the inaugural moves of integrating with outside nations. Kim Jong Un has also said that he will not threaten any countries that don't disrespect the interests of North Korea. Basically Kim Jong Un now wants to be seen as a leader that can be negotiated with instead of a delirious madman whose every action must be put in check. There's still some optimism to be had here (at least about, you know, not dying.)

Also, about a third of a thousand pages! Woo!