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Author Topic: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper  (Read 3489 times)

hops

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You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« on: January 26, 2013, 10:12:24 am »

So long ago, when the dwarves finally decided to flood the whole world with magma and change the overworld into one giant fortress. With the tyrannical yet mysterious ruling strategy of the Overseer, the ultimate ruler of the Great Fortress, there had been peace

Well, kind of, anyways, there are almost constantly riots, just because dwarves tend to start trying to kill each other when bored, but like you said, almost peace. The fort didn't tear itself up in some civil war or something.

You are one of the bookkeepers spread around the fortress to count and foresee the economy, and that had freed up most of your schedule. The Overseer seems to be unable to see the difference between you sitting and calculating and you sitting and procrastinating.

You have been calculating the age of the world from the microcline statue standing by your desk. Its age ended abruptly, as if the element was conjured instantly out of thin air. And before its creation there was oblivion, then... you had a glimpse of what lied before oblivion.



The world has been reset many times, probably by The Overseer, or maybe his "Blood God"

You're on to this mystery, you do not like the prospect of ceasing to exist.


You sit in your golden study, it is a gigantic room filled with elaborate golden statues decorated with the god metal, Adamantine. The microcline statue by your golden desk was the reminder of your study when you were just starting out on this job.

The door stands at the opposite wall, perhaps you might be able to sneak out, and the Overseer won't notice. It's not like he's omniscient, or something, that would be preposterous.
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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scapheap

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #1 on: January 26, 2013, 10:25:13 am »

Go for a drink, what with being a dwarf and all.
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hops

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #2 on: January 26, 2013, 10:36:19 am »

Go for a drink, what with being a dwarf and all.

2: You scoot over with your wheeled armchair to the control panel to press the REQUEST BOOZE button. Nothing happened.

Looks like there's some corpse clogging up the serving computer.

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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #3 on: January 26, 2013, 11:03:09 am »

Go for a wonder.
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You were planning to have a 15 year old magical girl kill Witches by drinking them under the table!? It's original, at least.
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GreatWyrmGold

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #4 on: January 26, 2013, 11:14:57 am »

Locate a book.
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rabidgam3r

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #5 on: January 26, 2013, 11:25:28 am »

Locate 'Overseer: Fact or Fiction?' and secretly read it, and then burn it to earn the Overseer's trust.
« Last Edit: January 26, 2013, 11:52:06 am by rabidgam3r »
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hops

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #6 on: January 27, 2013, 09:01:46 pm »

Go for a wonder.

6: You probably meant wander, but before you realize that you had already created Nīmugog, an artifact slade pen.
You have no idea how you got that slade, but anyways you have drawn the Overseer's attention.

Locate a book.

1: Nope. Dwarves think that books are blasphemy. They write by engraving instead.

Locate 'Overseer: Fact or Fiction?' and secretly read it, and then burn it to earn the Overseer's trust.

6: In the dark corner of the fortress there lie the most blasphemous engraving in existence. It is made by you, but you decided that it would be too risky, so you went to destroy it.

The Overseer is pleased by your action (you have no idea how he saw you, but yeah) and rewards you with a royal quarter. You can hear the anguished cry of a noble far on the other side of the fort.
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NoahTophatz

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #7 on: January 27, 2013, 09:06:24 pm »

insult that noble for all dwarves hate them
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Corai

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #8 on: January 27, 2013, 09:08:21 pm »

Look for something that will give us information on the overseer. But do it as if we are simply looking at our collection.
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Jacob/Lee: you have a heart made of fluffy
Jeykab/Bee: how the fuck do you live your daily life corai
Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

Gentlefish

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #9 on: January 28, 2013, 12:02:22 am »

Admire own fine sock.

Fireiy

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #10 on: January 28, 2013, 12:08:45 am »

PTW
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hops

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #11 on: January 29, 2013, 01:02:04 am »

insult that noble for all dwarves hate them

Technically, you are a noble, but whatever.

6: Your colorful display of language towards the Baron has given you more approval from the Overseer, but less to politicians. You will have to watch out for assassins.

Look for something that will give us information on the overseer. But do it as if we are simply looking at our collection.

4: You take a visit to this sector's library, and by library you mean a meeting hall that is always misty. There is an insane scrawling that you recognize to be the beardwriting of the bookkeeper before you. He died long ago, but probably it's so hard to see in the halls that nobody noticed them. It seems to be something about "PCs" and "bugfest". You use your powerful photographic memory to inscribe it in your mind and read it later.

Admire own fine sock.

6: You admire the Giant Cave Spider silk sock on your feet. You have a lot more of these, all hidden in the caverns below.
« Last Edit: January 29, 2013, 05:01:17 am by Objective »
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Corai

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #12 on: January 29, 2013, 01:04:08 am »

Continue investigating. Must find the source of this "Overseer" soon...
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Jacob/Lee: you have a heart made of fluffy
Jeykab/Bee: how the fuck do you live your daily life corai
Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

Gentlefish

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #13 on: January 29, 2013, 01:18:47 am »

Ponder on the meaning of bugfest. Consume plump helmet biscuit.

hops

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Re: You are a conspiracy theorist bookkeeper
« Reply #14 on: January 29, 2013, 10:31:05 am »

Continue investigating. Must find the source of this "Overseer" soon...

You review what you know in your hefty tome, entitled "Cat Leather Socks: Fact or Fiction", written using your alias.
Currently only a page of it contains something of use. But you'll change that soon as you go on with your investigation.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

You really doubt anyone would read it. Only legendary bookkeepers are capable of reading, and most of them goes insane before they had a chance to try to read something from a book, not to mention books are so rare you could easily say that you're holding the last book in existence.

2: You decided to examine with your minds eye the engraving you remembered earlier, but it is now gobbledygook to you. It's probably just soberness messing with your head, you really forgot to go grab a booze after that control panel got stuck.

Ponder on the meaning of bugfest. Consume plump helmet biscuit.

1: You ponder on the meaning of "bugfest" and could not think of anything other than insects. By Armok, your headache is getting worse just as soon as you noticed. You also for some reason decided to nab a plump helmet biscuit to eat even though you're not hungry.
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

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