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Dwarven ingenuity?

Keep on going downstraem
- 0 (0%)
Time for some heroic swimming?...no?
- 0 (0%)
Find a dead tree or other long object, work as a group to hoist it across. (With emphasis on actually finding said object...)
- 4 (44.4%)
Invent some absurd creation involving rope and stuff which slowly pulls tied up people across…
- 5 (55.6%)

Total Members Voted: 9


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Author Topic: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-  (Read 186549 times)

slowpokez

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #885 on: October 28, 2013, 01:15:39 pm »

Take the goblin heads as trophies. Maybe later we can attach them to our clothing to warn off others who might try something like that against us again.
Are yuo referring to the goblins heads or the shrunken heads which they were carrying? (of mixed variety)

..Did that gauntlet just play in on me? I'm not sure if we should try to take it off while we're in this state. Who knows, it might give some kind of backlash. Besides, I'm sure we'll be able to overcome it if it starts urging us to kill the humans, and they probably deserve it if we can't.

As far as looting goes, I'd say we could take the ring and hairband off the clubmoron and see if we can see where he dropped his necklace, inspect the thing the daggergoblin has in its hair and take his shirt, shoes and socks. Don't smoke them while the elf is near. Also, take the pouch from the wrestler(throw out junk like elven fingers, a pouch is still usefull.) and scan the intestines for anything undigested. We needn't eat it, but the humans might buy it.

If there's a full, undamaged goblin stomach among it, we can take that too. Just tie both ends tight with goblin hair. Goblins can digest bones, so their stomach acid must be pretty strong. If it's not usefull to us, it might be worth something on the black market.

I've already inclined I think it's smarter if we take a detour throught the human town.(Maybe if we take the fullest looking goblin intestine to dump in their well?) There'll be doctors, there'll be food, booze, maybe even a human or two that go missing and a house that catches fire for some reason. With humans in it, sleeping.

I suggest we keep the elf out of town to prevent futher 'trauma', and let him tell us what he needs. Humans like building homes out of wood, if he's got the slightest architectural or aesthetic sense, that'll really depress him. If not, he'll mourn the trees that died for those shacks.

Edit: Oh, and if anyone asks, we teamed up with the elf to avoid bogeymen after a goblin ambush killed our friend Urist.

Edit2: Did we remember to pick up our axe?

Edit3: Let's not sleep for a bit. Remember what the gauntlet spoke to Nerin in his sleep? He had our weak-willed Nerin alone and a lot of controll over what happened in said dream. We don't want to give the gauntlet that kind of controll when there are no crunchy humans between us and our allies.
1. .oOo., .oOo., .oOo. < different colours
2.Okay so you want to pick up all the filthy goblin scraps...convincing Nerin to smoke that might prove tricky. The same goes for rummaging around in the goblin's guts.
3.Same as above, but rolling successfully on this won't be easy.
4. -_____-'
5 I believe I've pointed this out but the elf is starving, don't forget about him.
6 Noted.
7 Yup, same with the cape. (forgot to draw the cape)
8 Who could ever say no to a nightly stroll through the woods after being pummeled around by a disfigured goblin...
« Last Edit: October 28, 2013, 01:22:33 pm by slowpokez »
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AfellowDwarf

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #886 on: October 28, 2013, 01:45:38 pm »

1. .oOo., .oOo., .oOo. < different colours
Oh, I figured the maniac laughter voice was another little something that came out of the gauntlet. Thanks for clearing that up.
2.Okay so you want to pick up all the filthy goblin scraps...convincing Nerin to smoke that might prove tricky. The same goes for rummaging around in the goblin's guts.
I'm not saying smoke anything right away. The elf would get mad at our pipe. I also don't suggest rummaging about the guts.(unless we go stomach hunting) Just giving it a quick look for undigested food.
5 I believe I've pointed this out but the elf is starving, don't forget about him.
Ah, the 'might not make it to the human town' kind of starving, then. Let's point the elf to our authentic, hand crafted goblin filet to still his hunger. Edit: Oh, right. Of couse we need to feed him once we arrive.
8 Who could ever say no to a nightly stroll through the woods after being pummeled around by a disfigured goblin...
Eh, I figured it's that or risking a murderous rampage.
« Last Edit: October 28, 2013, 01:52:06 pm by AfellowDwarf »
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Tirion

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #887 on: October 28, 2013, 03:25:36 pm »

I don't think Nerin or any of us is a skilled butcher, so no more diving in the filty lake of goblin organs. Gather stuff that looks shiny, like earrings, and go to that village, get some food for the elf. Or convince him to eat some roots, or inner softer part of tree bark, or tree sap, harvested carefully of course so the tree can heal. You could even look for fruits and other edibles, if the goat eats it on it's own it's not poisonous to you either.
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gman8181

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #888 on: October 28, 2013, 03:57:30 pm »

Shrunken heads and the actual goblin heads if possible.
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AfellowDwarf

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #889 on: October 28, 2013, 07:49:30 pm »

Shrunken heads and the actual goblin heads if possible.
Oh, sure, we're not collecting the stomach, but the head can come? Do you have any idea how much disgusting stuff is in those heads? His balls, my balls, your balls, elven balls, dwarven balls... It's all in there.
« Last Edit: October 28, 2013, 07:51:42 pm by AfellowDwarf »
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gman8181

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #890 on: October 28, 2013, 08:08:07 pm »

Well I'd say the head is less likely to be filled with feces than the intestines, so that's something. Also why are all of our balls in the goblin's stomach? I think I would remember losing my balls.
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NAV

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #891 on: October 28, 2013, 11:18:18 pm »

Take any shinies, sparklies, or thumbs. Give the elf the knifegoblin's knife, so he can actually defend himself. Also take the cudgel.

If the elf is hungry, then it can cook a goblin. Elves eat goblin, right?

If we have any spare glass bottles, then harvest the goblin stomach acid. No point taking the stomachs, they will just digest themselves.

Engrave pictures of the ugly goblin on trees while waiting for the elf to eat.
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AfellowDwarf

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #892 on: October 29, 2013, 01:42:13 am »

Also why are all of our balls in the goblin's stomach? I think I would remember losing my balls.
Oh, no, they're in his head. Have you heard him talk?

Edit: Also, haven't we just heard the elf say that elves are scared of metal?
« Last Edit: October 29, 2013, 08:26:45 pm by AfellowDwarf »
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Kaos

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #893 on: October 30, 2013, 06:26:17 am »

Let's see if the elf can be of any use, elves have no issue butchering sentients and making trophies out of them, so let's have the elf butcher the goblin corpses and let's make meals out of their meat/organs, also the elf could make crafts/trophies from their bones, maybe a bow and some arrows so he can be useful in the defence department?

Also it would be nice to go look for the nurse and get healed, can't the elf track? (maybe the goat can?) let's have the goat sniff a piece of cloth the nurse left behind (maybe some rags inside the coffin) and have the goat track the nurse like if it were a tracking hound! :D I bet she's still lost in the woods and we need health care/a somewhat useful companion, I reckon if we are going to have a pussy in our party (the elf) another one that actually has one (the nurse) and can heal us wouldn't hurt either!

By the way who killed the other two goblins? the goat? it couldn't have been... the elf!!?
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AfellowDwarf

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #894 on: October 30, 2013, 03:28:27 pm »

It couldn't have been... the elf!!?
Maybe he dared the one to bite the other's scrotum and things escalated between the two?
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Kaos

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #895 on: October 30, 2013, 07:12:39 pm »

It couldn't have been... the elf!!?
Maybe he dared the one to bite the other's scrotum and things escalated between the two?
... just... eh... scrotum... ah?... ???
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slowpokez

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #896 on: October 30, 2013, 07:19:38 pm »

It couldn't have been... the elf!!?
Maybe he dared the one to bite the other's scrotum and things escalated between the two?
... just... eh... scrotum... ah?... ???
This guy clearly do not share your ability for interpreting broken goblin speech, would you care to inform him of previous discussions in said language? :P

Tirion

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #897 on: October 31, 2013, 03:04:31 am »

The elf would be useless as a butcher just as he's useless as a warrior or a herbalist. We need him to escort us to his homeland, there we let him sing good things about us, and we look for some hot badass archer she-elf companion.
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slowpokez

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #898 on: October 31, 2013, 07:39:19 am »

As we're about to move out the voices go crazy and plans a detailed ransacking of the mutialted goblins, can't say I'm looking forward to going down the hole again...
The little trinkets and coins I was asked to retrieve felt like a reasonable bounty for a few minutes of casual looting but the voices had bigger plans, much bigger. After hours of notorious labor I managed to aquire 2 goblin heads, 3 shrunken heads of uknown origin, some dirty clothes, an entire goblin stomach and an additional coin. I even tried to have the elf join me in my work which he found utterly distasteful, bringing back a memory of him saying that canibalism amongst elves is only a habit common to their most ruthless warriors and that it's a poor representation of the elves as a whole. I manage to stop myself before handing him the knife as he also mentioned something about elves not being able to wield metal tools. In the end we decide we got to head for the human village nearby even though the elf believes it to be a bad idea...

As we set out the night had gotten darker and the clouds covering the moon had grown thicker, soon a strong westward wind was upon us...

-Hey...
-*cough*
-How did you kill the goblins? You know there was three of them...
-Oh, I have a...
Don't tell him about the gauntlet idiot!
What we're freinds!
Yea, then let's keep it that way!
But...
No butts!
Heh...butts.
I...
It's an evil artifact or something, you can't just walk around telling people about it!
But then what do I say!?
This is the time for some sweet, sweet dwarven propaganda!
Uhmm
-Have what?
-An axe!
-Eh?
-A mighty axe and an even mightier beard! Don't underestimate the dwarven battle prowess, we were born for war! Mohahhahaha...
That was a bit insensitive on the other hand...you know the whole dwarves killing elves n shit?
Opps.
-...hahhahaha...uhmm just kidding...

*A sudden bolt of lightning followed by a shower of heavy rain breaks the akward silence*

Maybe we should drop the elf...
What?
You know finding a dwarf wondering the woods alone is wierd enough...but a dwarf and an elf is bound to raise some questions...
He'll die if we leave him!
No, I mean we keep him out here out of harms way and bring him some food of some sort...
But...
Butt.
Don't worry Nerin we'll even leave Wilfred to guard him.
Wilfred's a goat!
And he's an elf, I don't see your point.
...

After discussing it over with Amathspar I leave him a few urists outside of the town and force my way through the falling rain.

The town was smaller then I expected and the houses were poorly constructed and dirty, in the end I approach one of the less shitty looking houses.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
A towering human opens up the door and had I not been beaten up I might've been a bit frightened however this time he's the one with a scared expression upon his face. I try to explain my story to him but he doesn't really buy it, he says goblins never travel this far east. Showing him a few goblin heads shut him up though.
He hesitates for a bit but in the end he invites me in.

At the door he quickly introduces me to his wife and son as well as their maid.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
The warm house help me regain a bit of sense and I ask them for a doctor but they explain that there is none nearby, you'd be forced to call for one from a few towns over which would take days. They do however offer me som porridge, not really a kittenstake but you can't complain. As they look away I pour the porridge into my pocket and quickly go for seconds. Once I was able to satisfy some of my hunger I realised that something was off about the people in there, they seemed kind of sad and rarely spoke. At first I wrote it off as some human thing but int the end I gave in to my curiousity and asked them about it. Once again they seemed a bit hesitant at first but decided to tell me a lenghty tale about how their village got taken over by a group of bandits. Apparantly it all came down to a single man whom had resently joined forces with the bandits, for in the past the villagers had always been able to fend off any such threats. The guy was a convicted felon from Capitol, renowned for his swordplay and lust for women. Ever since he arrived in the area noone has been able to get close to the packleader Gerug, so the bandits are free to wreck havoc upon the town as they see fit. Those that try have been swiftly dealt with by the swordsman whom only rarely leaves Greug's side to indulge in his own lustful activities.
I suddently get a feeling that perhaps I shouldn't stay in this town for too long, doesn't seem like something one would want to get involved in...
I excuse myself and go out for a quick smoke, on my way over to the elf I ponder on how everywhere I go there's nothing but misery and hardship...I kind of miss Rocklod again, something that I hadn't thought of in a long time. Seems so distant somehow...

The elf breaks up into a big smile as I hand him a fistful of oatmeal, whatever proud stature he mightv'e been trying to keep up until now got blown away. There we sit in the flushing rain and stare out into the dark abyss above the treetops, me smoking some filthy rags and the elf stuffing his face with cold porridge...I've had worse evenings I guess....
 
As I return the humans show me to a small room, perhaps a cubbyhole or a wardrobe, they refer to it as a guestroom but it's clearly too small for a human. But I'm not complaining and thank them wholeheartedly for giving me a warm place to sleep.
I wash off most of the blood before I head off to sleep, the little bed that they'd manage to cram into a corner was soft like a sheep, not at all like a dwarven bed. Must be stuffed with fur or something, maybe hay? Never know with these humans.
I'm more tired than what I've ever been before but the tender flesh around my broken ribs keeps me awake, guess I should be happy I'm still up and walking though...
Question is what the coming day will have in store for us. Perhaps we try to convince them to let me stay here for a while and regain my strength, or maybe it's time to leave before we get too involved with this stuff...

Can someone find the last inventory check? I'm pretty sure Nerin's overencumbered at this point.

AfellowDwarf

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Re: Cloudsprite(the peasant dwarf II?) -interactive story-
« Reply #899 on: October 31, 2013, 08:20:05 am »

As much as I'd like to stay and kill humans for either faction, we just don't have the ribs for it.

Alternatively, we could wear our cape as a shirt and flirt with this swordsman. Trick him into drinking too much for his pityable human liver and have him undress. Sleep with him untill he passes out(I guess this part is optional), and kill him in the neck. We'd be the 'hero' of this 'town'.

Edit: We could sneak away at night and liberate a human riding animal. It'd help compensate for Nerin's wounds. We could also swab the riding animal for a human child.

Edit2: Why not evacuate the entire town? The area won't serve humans anymore, the humans will be gratefull to us and the humans will have to go through the traumatic process of losing everything they own.

Then maybe we inform the bandits of the evacuation and torch the town while everyone is out.

Edit3: I think this was the last bag update:
-Bag-
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: October 31, 2013, 12:04:31 pm by AfellowDwarf »
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