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[TheSaberTooth]

Christ guys, don't taunt terry into blowing up my computer.
Anyway, I'll update later this afternoon, since I'm at school right now. 

[kefkakrazy]

He doesn't need to be taunted into it, just trying to run pathfinding on the eldritch abomination that is Murdermachines is enough to kill any computer.

We're so spread out and strung out between areas, with so many strange and unknown pathways and redundant paths and offshoots, that at this point I imagine that only the best processors are capable of getting a dwarf from Point A to Point B while ensuring that they track through a pool of gecko sauce on the way there.

[Shaggard]

  Although perhaps 'Anti-Hero' would be a more accurate term. They do good, but not always in the most moral way...

I think "Semi-Villain" might be a bit more accurate, considering, well, MurderMachines.

[TheSaberTooth]

Here is update 1:

Journal of Saber Idarban, Saborian:
1st of Granite, 271-
In the months prior to today, after I had arrived to Murdermachines, I decided to survey this fortress and see what was going on and such. Today I finished my assessment and I have only a few words to say about the general state of the fortress.

What. The. FUCK?!

The entire place is littered with trash, corpses, more trash, MORE corpses, and even more trash. In my past life, I visited some messy dwarven fortresses before, but THIS place is just UGLY. Anyway, I've decided, from this moment on, I'm going to do all I can to help clean up this place. I suppose I should also help improve living conditions. I'll decide later.

6th of Granite, 271-
There isn't much going on in the fortress at the moment, other than a goat giving birth. A couple of dwarfs claim to have heard the sounds of fighting and screams in the cavern. Odd. I may look into it later. Anyway, I've ordered the smelters to start- well- smelting ore. I will also be looking for suitable recruits for the military, if any.

On another note, I've noticed that many of the residents of Murdermachines are scarred, missing some limb, or have broken bones. Not just in the military, but in civilians as well. I mean, Fungin the miner is missing her entire right arm. I suppose this should be expected, since this place is a vortex of death and madness.

15th of Granite, 271-
I found a pond being drained into a valley area for no obvious reason.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Just... Why?

Clearly, whoever did this is a evil mastermind hellbent on flooding the world. While I was looking at the draining pond, I saw some raven people fly overhead. I think one of the women winked at me. I'm going to have nightmares after that...

Anyway, I'm amazed at Murdermachines wealth, productiveness, and military strength. I had the bookkeeper give me an estimate on the total wealth of the fortress, and it was something like 11,000,000! The fortess is as ugly as an donkey and as insane as you can imagine, but DAMN we are productive.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

We also have WAY to many drinks, I might add.

Nothing much is going on still. The quiet disturbs me... I have a feeling something bad shall happen in the near future.

22nd of Granite, 271-
I swear, this fortress is a deathtrap. Today I saw a very startling sight. Two Forgotten beasts were idling reletively near the bedrooms in the first cavern.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

They seemed to be communicating, possibly plotting the downfall of this fortress. I am not going to have that. From the looks of it, something can be build over them, such as a wall. A wall could be the DOWNFALL of THEM! AHAHAHA!

...This fortess is getting to me. I've ordered my fellows to begin constuction. The end for the Beasts is near.
End of page

[CaptainMcClellan]

Don't touch the forgotten beasts! They're walled off and safe. Everytime we try to take on Baru, it ends badly. Check his scarring and kill list.

[TheSaberTooth]

Don't touch the forgotten beasts! They're walled off and safe. Everytime we try to take on Baru, it ends badly. Check his scarring and kill list.

Thats why cave ins exist. And i'll also take out Lanani aswell.

[SanDiego]

I'm going to do all I can to help clean up this place.

Yeah, good luck with that. Every time someone tried they ended up adding to the mess. And by that I mean their corpses were piled upon it.

[Dwarf4Explosives]

Maybe you could lure Baru into a cage trap, using a cave-in to stun it? Using yet more traps and a system of grates, we could coat items in poison as kobold deterrents.

Also, we may need more lava in this fortress' design. At the moment it's just wasting away underground, after all. A lava moat could be useful, and if we have an aquifer we could use some more magma to seal off unused parts of the fortress with obsidian.

[CaptainMcClellan]

Maybe you could lure Baru into a cage trap, using a cave-in to stun it? Using yet more traps and a system of grates, we could coat items in poison as kobold deterrents.

Also, we may need more lava in this fortress' design. At the moment it's just wasting away underground, after all. A lava moat could be useful, and if we have an aquifer we could use some more magma to seal off unused parts of the fortress with obsidian.

Tried that, he apparently has trap_avoid. Don't know about his mate. Just do the cave-in or leave him. I mean, he's been there for like five turns without causing trouble.

We have useful lava things. However if you want to try to limit our space with a lava moat, go ahead and kill half the fort with !!FUN!! However, one thing I think we should do, if we can do it safely, is a magma incinerator. Magma mist could be a health problem, as could the FPS drop.

[TheSaberTooth]

Cage traps wont work on Forgotten Beasts. Or any other generated megabeast, as they ALL have the [TRAPAVOID] tag. From the massive amount of scars on that puppy, I'm guessing he cant bleed to death. So next beast thing, drop a rock on him and his compatriot.

[kefkakrazy]

Cage traps wont work on Forgotten Beasts. Or any other generated megabeast, as they ALL have the [TRAPAVOID] tag. From the massive amount of scars on that puppy, I'm guessing he cant bleed to death. So next beast thing, drop a rock on him and his compatriot.

Trapavoid doesn't apply if the subject is webbed or KO'd. Considering our history trying to manage capturing and deploying a GCS in the area would probably result in an extinction-level event, but if you can KO the Forgotten Beast with a cavein blast you should be able to cage it up just fine, unless they're also hardcoded to be immune to cage traps even if unconscious, which I don't even know if that's a thing.

[TheSaberTooth]

TheSaberTooth Cancels play Dwarf Fortress: Family event.
Sorry bout that, I'll update tomarrow.

[TheSaberTooth]

Update 2, huzzah!

Journal of Saber Idarban, Saborian:
9th of Slate, 271
At the moment, I have ordered a walkway be built over the Beasts heads. Once the walkway is built directly over their heads, I will order part of it disconnected, and the floor will fall upon the beasts, hopefully striking them down. One of the dwarfs told me the names they have given the beasts. Baru, for the two legged reptile, and Lanami the Abyssal Cat, for the iguana.

Moving on, today while I was getting my equipment, I saw Krosan the axedwarf speaking to his steel shield as if it were alive.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I have a feeling that the shield will be used by Krosan for something erotic. Creep.

23th of Slate, 271
Ghosts are a real annoyance around here. There are 4 now. One of them, barely arisen yesterday, is following a fish dissector ,moaning like- Well, You know.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Oh and they were apparently hitched before the guy died. Kyh must be traumatized.

And we got MIGRANTS??? People who actually CHOSE to live in this hellhole? I count 8 of them, not including their pets. I have my new recruits. In other news, a goblin axeman has appeared out of nowhere inside the fort. I'll take care of it myself. Oh and Prosnorkulus joined in the fray.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Foolish Goblins. And trolls. They were no match for Murdermachines. I doubt anything but ourselves will destroy this place.

Page ends here
(Sorry about the shortness of this update, I'll loaded down with chores.)

[kefkakrazy]

Please change Krosan's profession to Captain Murdermachines. It seems appropriate.

(why yes I did go see Captain America today, what of it)

[CaptainMcClellan]

Please change Krosan's profession to Captain Murdermachines. It seems appropriate.

(why yes I did go see Captain America today, what of it)

Ppfpt. Why not? Let's corrupt all the superhero icons into Murdermachines forms.