I lose my arm!
Grow back my arm by possessing nearby junk and try to knock the castle down
[2] You fail to do so. [4] You knock down an important-looking wall one-armed. Sadly, some guy came up and put a big stick in place to replace it!
I'll lose a limb. I've got 8, after all.
Break the keystone, causing the palace to crumble down.
Absorb the rubble.
[1] You break off your remaining limbs. Um.
Name: Blade 187
Descrption: the 187th knight in the doomy blades. Wields a blade.
ATTACK KNIGHT TIGER'S INNER SANCTUM.
...You already kinda are.
It's not working too well.
Control said Vultures
[3] 10 of the vultures turn! Oh, and you lose your head. As Cthulhu, this is a minor inconvenience.
Burn the Knight Tiger with fire.
Lose tail.
Being off-balance, [1-1] you manage to fall out of the castle.
Step back to just behind where Scapheap/Jacob appeared.
Pull out pocket watch.
Turn back time to just before Scapheap appears.
Wait for Scapheap/Jacob to appear.
Bash on back of head with silver-skull-topped-cane.
Turn back time to present.
[3] Time evidently doesn't work that way, so you swing your cane [v2] at Doomblade's head!
Swing stupidly large sword at nearest living thing!
[4] A Haunting Vulture is cleaved in half! Good job! You're at the final boss and you can kill an average mook! You're so overpowered!
Action: Request holy relics from Donut God to fight with.
[4] You get a Donut Ring, the inverse of a donut hole, which holds the power of pastry!
>GET IN CANNON. LAUNCH SELF AT PALACE.
>BEGIN ASSAULT
Lose pinky.
You lose a pinky. And the rest of the arm.
You're already on the ground, so you [3] run up to the palace. Evidently, the stupid defenders didn't have any cannons that fired at their own palace! Can you imagine?
Pray for my own battle vestments; call the knight tiger out as a heretic.
[3-1] You are given a divine smack for calling your superior in the clergy a heretic. You lose your tail, which leaves you unbalanced.
Attempt to knock down a wall with the REALLY BIG stick
[1] You try to smack a wall down, but it gets caught against the ceiling, forming a pillar to replace the wall Furtaka knocked down.
Appear, with my absurdly oversized now-city-state's army behind me.
Your castle is in direct violation of this planet's building code. Prepare to die.
Knight Tiger hands you the proper forms, pulling them from under his pillow. Huh, I didn't think that bit of notes I made would possibly be used.
Choose to lose my medusa head. Draw sword and summon other greek heroes.
[4] "Achilles! Heracles! Kratos! Come to my aid!" They do. Sadly, the Vultures rip your medusa head out of your hands. They also take a hand, for good measure.
GM TURN:
Knight Tiger summons [3] a dozen miniature super-intelligent genetically-modified bunnies. He then suggests that Vorthon join him, to get a better rank in the clergy.
The Haunting Vultures use the head of medusa to [5+1] petrify EVERYONE, including each other. Oops...
Dusky, Statue of a Religious Fanatic without a BIG stick
Doomblade187, Statue of a 187th Knight of the Doomy Blades
Furtaka, One-Armed Mars golem
LordSlowpoke, Statue of a Boastful Creature
persus, Statue of Perseus
Pufferfish, Statue of a Overpowered Sequel Companion with a BFS
scapheap, Dead
TheZoomZoll, Statue of a Headless Cthulhu
tomio175, Statue of a Knight
Vorthon, Statue of a Cleric with an Exoskeleton (Machine God)
Xantalos, Statue of a Limbless Space Octopus
10 Statues of Haunting Vultures of Armok, the Blood Planet
Statue of Achilles
Statue of a Heracles
Kratos
Leader: Knight Tiger, animated statue priest of the Machine God (+2)
TopHat: Mostly-sane Upper-class DF-player
39 Statues of Haunting Vultures of Armok, the Blood Planet
12 Miniature Super-Intelligent Genetically-Modified Bunnies
Leader: da_nang, One-Armed (+0)