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Author Topic: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Derm has entered the Booze Dimension  (Read 1006241 times)

Toaster

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #645 on: December 11, 2012, 09:30:09 pm »

"Oh no you di-unt."

Revenge spell on Possibly!
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #646 on: December 11, 2012, 09:49:02 pm »

((It's all good- I fully expected someone to come after me eventually.  I'm just glad I got myself a neat toy first.  But yeah, I have to kill you both now- sorry!

Fun fact- Possibly and I are the oldest two living characters; he's the oldest, and the last of the original eight.  I'm #10.))
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Dermonster

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #647 on: December 11, 2012, 09:53:39 pm »

Fun fact- Possibly and I are the oldest two living characters; he's the oldest, and the last of the original eight.  I'm #10.

Targets acquired.
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #648 on: December 11, 2012, 09:56:17 pm »

More like target, since one or the other of us is quite likely to be the death that lets you spawn in.
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Dermonster

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #649 on: December 11, 2012, 09:58:53 pm »

I still have no idea what is going on, who anyone is, where anyone is, what they are doing or what the arena actually looks like, or what any of the words mean or do.

WIZARDS!
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

kisame12794

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #650 on: December 11, 2012, 10:18:50 pm »

Welcome to Perplexicon.
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The non-assholes vastly outnumber the assholes but the assholes can fart with greater volume.
((You're an arm and a torso in low orbit. This was the best possible resolution of things.))

Dermonster

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #651 on: December 11, 2012, 10:21:25 pm »

Retort: Prepare for Derm.
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

satan

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #652 on: December 11, 2012, 10:22:23 pm »

ZZERALLETH CONTH KARENTHAR!
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ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

Unholy_Pariah

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #653 on: December 11, 2012, 10:54:01 pm »

okay im editing my action due to not wanting to make an enemy of onyxjew, check your inbox before you post the turn please :)
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Clearly running multiple missions at the same time is a terrible idea.  The epic battle to see which team can cock it up worse has escalated again.

And Larry kinda gets blueballed in all this; just left with a raging bone spear and no where to put it.

piecewise

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #654 on: December 12, 2012, 12:39:01 am »

I still have no idea what is going on, who anyone is, where anyone is, what they are doing or what the arena actually looks like, or what any of the words mean or do.

WIZARDS!

The op has some admittedly shitty maps. It's a 5 level pit of an arena, which is why the little thing at the end of every one of my posts lists the location as what level they're on and where they are on that level.  As per who everyone is, I'll add that to the posts from now on. As per what they're doing, you can probably just read the last three turns before the one you get brought in on and know everything you need to know. In general, if they're not actively trying to murder someone they're sequestered in a corner somewhere fiddling with their words.

If you need something explained or expanded on just let me know. I'll help with anything beyond telling you what the words do.


Say a magic word.

If all is well, ask if Thrakor is interested in experiments after greeting him.

[pot:5]

Nothing seems to happen.

You attempt to talk to Thrakor but he seems reasonably busy with the two men trying to murder him in cold blood.

Get by with a little help from my friends. Try to wake up. If I do wake up, use my Spell from Hell on Thrakor.
You will be napping for this turn, but at the end of this turn you wake up, so gird your loins or grind your lions or whatever it is kids do these days to get ready.


Oblivious to the current situation Selande points at the pillar and shouts "Zaralo Gars".

[pot:4-1]
You speak your words and wait as they take effect, a living tattoo crawling out across your chest. It stops spreading and then begins to glow brightly.
[str:2-1]

All at once you are forced you your knees, over powered by a great weight. Your chest seems to weigh hundreds of pounds.  You struggle against it for a few seconds  before promptly collapsing  and smashing your face against the ground.

[end:4]

You split your lip but are otherwise unharmed.


Alexander will move even further down, to the first floor.

You wander down to the first floor and continue to flex.

ZZERALLETH CONTH KARENTHAR!

[pot:2+1]
You get one tiny lump of flesh, slightly throbbing, A tiny glimmering point of light that is surrounded a corona of slowly moving threads of light,  and a  smattering of floating, luminescent dust that moves of it's own accord, forming nested euclidean solids, dispersing and then reforming.

The dust and the point of light vanish after a few seconds, the flesh remains.


"Oh no you di-unt."

Revenge spell on Possibly!
"Wait, why the hell did we do that whole scheme to make it look like an accident if you're going to consider it a direct attack?! These game mechanics...."

Shake head, slap allies face with meaty flesh sack nearby. Then sit down in a corner and Words. Unless ally attacks. In which case aid ally in, possibly ill-fated, assault. With Words.

((Same question as above, we could have just bumrushed him, and twin blasts of molten rock would have worked just as well. Probably better, the odds of a dramatic failure by me are one in six, odds of success by me are four in six. Odds of success by ally are three in six, odds of failure by ally are two in six. Odds of failing to kill him by both of us are one in eighteen! Why the hell didn't we just turn him into a human-cicle?!

I really need a drink.....))

Thrakor leaps up from his cover and charges around the edge of the arena, staying behind the cover of the scattered rocks until he finally gets a good line of sight with Possibly, who  is moving to grab the lump of flesh he earlier summoned.

[thrakor dex:1+2]
[possibly dex:4]

[possibly pot:2+1]
[dex (for aim):5]
[thrakor dex (for dodge):4+2]

Possibly spins on his heel and shouts an incantation. A thin beam of fire erupts from in front of him and screams out toward Thrakor. Thrakor ducks and springs forward, dodging under the stream of fire. He rolls as the fire bursts against a rock behind him and gets to his feet, dangerously near the edge of the ledge

[thrakor pot:3+1]
[dex(for aim):2+2]
[possibly dex (for dodge):6]

Thrakor points at Possibly and shouts his words. A twisting black tendril, coated in a noxious green haze, erupts from the tip of his finger and streaks toward Possibly, jerking violently as it flies. Possibly leaps to the side, avoiding the attack, but jumping directly into a rock.

[Possibly end:3]

Possibly's shoulder dislocates with a loud pop. Clutching it and gritting his teeth in agony he manages to crawl behind the rock, seeking cover.


okay im editing my action due to not wanting to make an enemy of onyxjew, check your inbox before you post the turn please :)

[pot:3+1]

A lump of flesh falls down beside a rapidly growing plant which appears to be some sort of odd mix of giant flower and fern.

You shrug and move on to other matters of plant based science.

[will:5]

Fresh stalks and vines burst from the vegetation around the perimeter of your little garden, growing 2 inch long, hypodermic needle sharp thorns as they rise several feet into the air. Within a few seconds there is a 4 foot hedge of organic barbed wire along the entire perimeter of your garden.








Hydrus awakens! He's laying behind a rock, between Thrakor and Possibly.



Alexander:Choobakka: Pool:2/2 [first floor, south stairs]

Phil:Greatwyrmgold: pool:1/1 [forth floor, north east side]

Selande:KineseN: Pool: 1/4 (pinned) [fourth floor, north stairs]

Possibly:Onyxjew: Pool:1/2 (some cloth, right arm marked, Right arm living steel, left shoulder dislocated.) [Fourth floor, hiding behind a rock on north west side.]

Susan: satan: Pool:1/3 [first floor,center]

Thrakor(10):Toaster: Pool:2/3 (Bone deep gash in left upper arm. Bandaged but Left arm useless.Right hand made of electricity.)[Fourth floor, North west side]

Hydrus:Wwolin: Pool:2/2  [fourth floor, north west  area.]

Waldo(8): Unholy_pariah: Pool:1/5 (plant staff) [Fourth floor, West stairs.] 
« Last Edit: December 12, 2012, 12:44:06 am by piecewise »
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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #655 on: December 12, 2012, 01:00:50 am »

Eat my delicious magic!

Execute Magical Donuts!
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #656 on: December 12, 2012, 01:06:20 am »

A map of Level 4 might help, given that there are trees and electric balls and murder and innocent bystanders all over it.
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Wwolin

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #657 on: December 12, 2012, 01:21:27 am »

"I'm not dead? Hell yeah, I'm not dead! But I don't know how long that will last. But..." Hydrus turns to Thrakor and grins like a madman, "I wouldn't take a step back if I were you. It's one hell of a fall. Wouldn't it be a shame if you fell while dodging one of my attacks?"

Point at Thrakor and use My Spell. Laugh if it hits him. Laugh even harder if he jumps off of the ledge while trying to dodge it.

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I meant we'd start stabbing the walls and floor for points and not just for science.

Unholy_Pariah

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #658 on: December 12, 2012, 01:25:36 am »

Cut out thy murderous shenanigans ye rotten scoundrels, this realm is for science and meditation

gather some fruits and throw them over my fence to thrakor, hydrus and possibly then use my staff to command some of the bushes to become trees and hide in the entrance to the stairwell. if anyone attacks me electrocute them.

((I rather expected to get a meat tree out of that :( ))
« Last Edit: December 12, 2012, 08:24:38 am by Unholy_Pariah »
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Clearly running multiple missions at the same time is a terrible idea.  The epic battle to see which team can cock it up worse has escalated again.

And Larry kinda gets blueballed in all this; just left with a raging bone spear and no where to put it.

piecewise

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Re: Perplexicon: Magic is Confusing:Live by Garstopit, Die by Garstopit
« Reply #659 on: December 12, 2012, 01:42:03 am »

A map of Level 4 might help, given that there are trees and electric balls and murder and innocent bystanders all over it.
(your ball fell off and down to the first level by the way.

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