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[hops]

Also note that pork apparently taste like human.

You savage cannibals.

[a1s]

My children often ask me what the most interesting thing in life is. I tell some of them that it's Family, a good job, and eductaion. I tell others that it's sex, drugs and RockNRoll. And to others still I say nothing and only smile mysteriously. Because the most interesting thing in life is a well conducted experiment with two subject groups and a control.

[Avis-Mergulus]

My children often ask me what the most interesting thing in life is. I tell some of them that it's Family, a good job, and eductaion. I tell others that it's sex, drugs and RockNRoll. And to others still I say nothing and only smile mysteriously. Because the most interesting thing in life is a well conducted experiment with two subject groups and a control.

I'm not sure, but it's entirely possible that we have similar things in our vk feeds.

[Spehss _]

A man wakes up in a hospital after a terrible car accident. He yells to the doctor, "Oh my God, Doctor, I can't feel my legs!"










The doctor replies "I know. I amputated your arms."

[Bohandas]

In RPG you can always find party. In Soviet-era Russia party can always find you.

[TheDarkStar]

In RPG you can always find party. In Soviet-era Russia party can always find you.

In Capitalist America, you always find party. In Soviet Russia, Party always find you.
In Soviet Russia, you rob bank. In Capitalist America, bank rob you.

[Spehss _]

A dwarf escaped from a prison. This dwarf was a mystic and claimed he could commune with the spirits, who helped him escape from his confinement.

The prison announced the dwarf's escape over the radio, saying "There is a small medium at large."

[origamiscienceguy]

A dwarf escaped from a prison. This dwarf was a mystic and claimed he could commune with the spirits, who helped him escape from his confinement.

The prison announced the dwarf's escape over the radio, saying "There is a small medium at large."

I know this joke slightly differently.

"I had a troubling dream last night, so I went to see the local fortune teller. Once I walked in, the first thing I noticed was that the man was extremely tiny, but I decided to continue on with the procedure. He was halfway through explaining my dream when the SWAT team burst through the door. Instantly, the fortune teller vanished. Now, he is a small medium at large."

[Bohandas]

A man was beaten to death in a rice-field last night by mobsters wielding small porcelin figurines. This is the first confirmed case of a knick-knack paddy whack.

[Orange Wizard]

Even worse if he was Irish.

[Tack]

-Joke-

Kermit the frog goes to get a bank-loan for his next movie. He finds the most kindly looking teller - 'Petritia Whack', and proceeds to ask her for the loan. She asks if he has any collateral. He produces a small ivory elephant. She asks if he has family who are willing to back his loan. He replies that he is the son of Mick Jagger.
Confused, she calls the manager over to get some reference on this whole thing. Kermit holds up the little elephant and she first asks, 'What's this?'
The manager replies:
"It's a knick-knack, patty whack, give the frog a loan. His old man's a rolling stone"

[SirQuiamus]

Spanish word for a cat's litter box?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Cat-a-loo-nyaa~

[Akura]

-Joke-

Kermit the frog goes to get a bank-loan for his next movie. He finds the most kindly looking teller - 'Petritia Whack', and proceeds to ask her for the loan. She asks if he has any collateral. He produces a small ivory elephant. She asks if he has family who are willing to back his loan. He replies that he is the son of Mick Jagger.
Confused, she calls the manager over to get some reference on this whole thing. Kermit holds up the little elephant and she first asks, 'What's this?'
The manager replies:
"It's a knick-knack, patty whack, give the frog a loan. His old man's a rolling stone"

FAIL: Actually pretty funny.

[Bohandas]

Q.) What's the most gangster side-dish?
A.) Glockamole

[martinuzz]

What does a German pilot say when being chased by an old Russian fighter?

"MiG am Arsch"