okay slessee here...
22 dorfs...
gate hotkey doesnt' point ta the gate...
secnon shortcut sdoesn't ... isn't labbleld
points at the digning hall
where's the kitchen? we dont' have one? FOOL!
what does this even say?
(get the fucout tinpytipc, i''M too drunk for these long-ass captcahs)
rad? with a sideways k?
we have merchants?
and no depot, lol
at lesats the rooms list is sso short I can read it
OH WAIT RIGHT
I DIDN'T DO MY JOKE
okay so today we learned
pffffft
I haven't been in Japan for months, lemme tell you a funny story instead
so in Japan
no pizza
well, no good pizza.
the most common pizza in jaPan is... swear I can't make this up... mayonnaize and corn pizza. holy damn.
So I get back to gcanada.
wanna have a pizza party with my friends.
what place do we get pizza from? sick of this shit.
so
we order pizza from 7 places
in the time ti took me to call all the others, family pizza had SHOWED UP. I called them first, they're down the street form me, and thye keep theriy stuff ready... or heatde... or... something. They fast.
Next up.
Dominoies guy takes my money.
Walks past the pizza hut guy. he was standing in line.
Versn' pizza guy has parked in frton of the neighbors and is walking down the sidewalk like "the fuuuuck"
...dominoes won. I'm suprised too.
so this drunk fort!
We haff merchants. And no deopt.
...andno flat spot for a deopt.
SO WE NEED TO BUILD A FLAT-
wwiat. Just put it on top of the mountain. unbuilt it later.
NO PROBLEMS RITE
...no mason
merchants left
fuck
WE HAVE HEMATITE!?
also did I just spell heamttie right? damn. need moar drunk.
fey mood! but it's from crafstdepr so... gonna suck
ooh, gold.
why warent' we making use of the olcano? must fix...
ooh, rock crystal. This place is graet!
mason cancels give food: no food
yeah could be a problem
maybe we should...... uh.
* shoruke hasn't drof fortressd in months
how do dorfs get food again?
RIGHT fram the sand
*2 mins later*
we have a problem
oh we have 3 animals to butcher
WE'RE SAVED
KILL TEH BUNNYS!
...and the cow. and dat ass.
also I made myself into 3 nobles. Maybe we can get some bookeepedign doen
In fact, you could say I wrecked dat-
* shoruke cancels terrible pun: girlfriend is present
( ireally did tho
)
scuse me while I lock my dorf-self in my room and "do the books". (girlfriend needs a rest)
gonna. haverst the fvolcanoge somehow
i swaeirs it
okay
door THEN magma
gotta get it right the frist tiem
we have NO ANVILES!?
y u do dis
...i should give that fairy guy a craftderp workshp
oh hey went stark raving mad a month ago. whoops. sry brospeh
still no food. well, only 20 foods. considering killing dorfs so I can butcher their 4 pets for noms.
plus then there'd be 4 lefs dorfs to feed... hmm...
HLY SHIT WE CAN PMAKE MPAROTALS!?
oh wait that means door. fuckin...
girlfriend helpd me make a meme
dorfs are alsways not busy. need to fix.
need more trees...
need more... project.
also I should make my name as a thing.
and mine some gorram heamtite jesus
hmm, a withrdrwal mood. like fey mood without the exp right? laym
looks like a great spot for a depot
gr8 m8 ra8 8/ei8
it's spring!
gon' be gawgiss
welp, dead guy uh... is dead. so. prolly bury him? Shork style.
we have planfs. to make BEWZ
MIGRANTS OH BOY
NOW WE CAN
... have more idlers. I think maybe I'm bad at this?
the migrants are milling
not like churning plants i mean theyre hanging out where they spawn
are they stuck?
or just dumb... wait...
option 2. Regadrlesd of whether theyre stuck.
DOES HE LIKE BULLSHIT MEN
oh bushtit men.
heh. well if that's what floats yer bote dude
bush, yes. tits, heck yes. men? ehhh....
one of the glazers is on break and went to hang out with the new arrivlers. buncha weirdos...
weirdoge, loll
=0
TWO OF THEIR PETS HAVE KIDS
that I can slaughter for noms :3
of course non of the immigrants thought to bring a nanvil. twerps.
"high master dyer"
I let one of the migrants be a hunter. He seemed so excetied. Now I remember why I never allow huntring. He keeps getting scared off... by what he's hunting...
o ya that fey guy made a table. I took it for my office ^_^
WHICH PEOPLE GKEEP STANDING IN
GET AWAY YOU PEASANTS
why are some ob the beds 2x3 and some are 2x2?
woodctuterp gets a fey mood
yay
goes to craftsderp shop
nonono
picks up one rock
begins construction
fuck
made a mug. siiiigh. didn't even get any exp because possession
oh, uh. uoops.
hey so uh
I was just mining next to this cavern I found
thought I'd issplore it a bit, find out what's what
close it up after
you know, recon stuff
and, uh
well
tell me what you think happens next to this guy...
and the staircase behind him...
WHOA HOLY SHIT HE LIVED
and someone managed to door the hallway in time?
AND SOMEONE EVEN MANAGED TO GO BACK AND GET THE WHEELBARROW
holy fuck! Praise be to the RNG! It's a sign!
That I'm about to get fucked by someonthing bigger than a lake.
*some migrants have arrived*
...um. Hiiiii...
You know, I should really be putting someof thies migratns into the miltiry.
...i should also figure oyt the miltray one of these years
its midsummer
still no elfs
bliss
ewell except the starving
that would be fixed by robbing the elfs blind
but still
NO ELVFS
no humins thoe. hmm.
OH FOR THE LOVE OF-
caravan shows up
oh fuck oh fuck we don't even have mechanisms ofr food let alone statues or mugs
no liason
hmm
why didn't I make mechanisms and mugs
fuck fuck fuck
sell them gold bars
get to the dep-
why isn't there...
WHY ARE THEY FUCKING GONE!?!!??!?!?!?!!
did they give up ebcause of the snow?
WHAT KIND OF FUCKING
UN-CANADIAN
DERPTASTIC
BITCH SONOFVA CUNT FUCKER WIMPTATSTIC WEAKSUACOE NERD FUCKER
wimpy traders are theese?!
FUCK
wait
nevermind, I *like* these desistnregrating caravans
FREE SWAG
* shoruke slap'd
FREE LOOT
INCLUDING AN ANVIL
AND NOMS
WE'RE SAVED
I still don't know how... apparently a wagon just... died on the spot...
whitohout generating a combat report...
...women drivers? XD
let the fort become boozeless. must fix...
and also make a watering hole...
which sadly isnt' a feupfhanmism for pub, I mean that water in the cavern.
...belrgh. I'm done. I'm too full to keep drinking and these chocolates can only keep you so drunk.
Enjoy the glitched-out anvils I guess
Poll
Author
Topic: !!DRUNK FORTRESS!! [We Hath Become Death, the Destroyers of Worlds] (Read 1239929 times)