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[highmax28]

It looks as if I'll be returning... I'll start soon

[highmax28]

I appologze for the delay, College work and my job were being assholes
But without farthur ado, let us begin

THE RETURN OF HIGHMAX![/size]

1st of Granite, 255
It's been four years since I left my seat of power. Much has changed. Much has stayed the same. Last year I had first tasted the blood of elves... AND I LOVE IT! I will murder every elf in existance if I have to! I shall kill THOUSANDS WITH MY BLADE! I will lead us all into glory and death! My goal before this year ends, I shall SLAUGHTER EVERY ELF THAT COMES NEAR THE FORTRESS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH!!!!!

I started by taking a look around and I noticed first: WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE IN MY TOMB!?!?!?! DEFILERS! Get away from my tomb! What? Its a statue garden!? WHO HAS DONE THIS! They shall feel the sting of my blade!

Next, I appoint myself as champion. Thats right, I'm the god damn champion now. NOBODY is better then me, NOBODY AT ALL!!!! The voices of the dead tell me so...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I have decided to rename the squad I command to Highmax's Vanguards. NOBODY FUCKS WITH THE VANGUARDS, NOBODY!!!! AND EVERYONE WHOS A VANGUARD WILL HAVE THEIR OWN TITLE! EXCEPT ME!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I also saw this strange, carved block in the pits of the fortress. The previous dwarf in charge said its to be a temple to Armok. WHY ARMOK!? Armok shouldn't be praised in the pits, he should be praised in battle! Glorious and bloody is his temple, where his temple is the fields of war, his altar our flags, and his stained windows the fires of war! I END THE PRODUCTION OF THIS! I'm also ending it because I don't have the slightest fucking idea what they wanted it to look like (Sorry!)

As for my weapons and armor, I will wear the artifact mail made of bronze, that bastard Wrex beleives he can wear the sacred silver armor in battle as a glorious warrior? I THINK NOT!!! I'll let him and his men go out on the next attack and see if his platoon can last on the fields of battle! I end off my report here so I can spread blood across our halls. Hehehehehe... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!

[highmax28]

2nd Granite, 255
I realised something:
What the hell is with the loose bullshit outside our base? GO PICK THAT SHIT UP! I also noticed we have 21 other dwarves doing ABSOLOUTLEY NOTHING!!! MOVE YOU LAZY DOGS! We have jobs to do! We also have all of our miners digging out that "temple" and they have no way out... SMART MOVE! YOU JUST TRAPPED OUR SECOND MOST IMPORTANT DWARVES! The first being the Vanguards of course. The baron approached me and started to complain about how I'm desecrating the temple he designed. I told him that the design was too complicated and at current is a waste of dwarfpower. And I said he also had a funny hat. He also yelled at me after the hat saying I shouldn't have a better tomb then him. I told him he can go have his fancy schmancy tomb once the diggers are free from his little "temple". I also told him since he's baron, he's going to be our mayor... We have annoiances with the present one, so why not let them all stockpile in one nuisance?

I'm also wondering whos the moron who broke our perfectly working military training camp... I WILL FEED THEIR CORPSES TO THE CARP! I also found out that the Vanguards are so elite,  NO OTHER GROUP can match them. I sugest the reworking of our military and then we have ourselves make grander ideals. I want roads paved with gold! I want the elves comming to us and fearing our power! And I want the iron from the humans... Sneaky bastards... Iron, from this day foreward, will be a sacred commodity, only used by Vanguards for furniture. I also have just RECENTLY noticed the HUGE ASS BALLISTA aimed RIGHT AT OUR FRONT DOOR... Great way to invite our relatives and our Human allies!

I'm also looking at our trade workings with our relatives back across the sea and I wonder: WHO THE HELL CAUSED THIS INFLATION!?!?!?!? We asked for nothing but steel, yes, but EVERYTHING ELSE THEY WANT IS SO USELESS IN VALUE, WE COULD JUST USE NORMAL CRAP AND MAKE MORE!!!!! I was also told theres nothing left to catch in the river... WELL SO WHAT!? We have plenty of food to last us and plenty of booze!

I also noticed all the blood going down the river... Such a beautiful sight... Then I saw the dead carp, the carp drifting in a cage and a ramp setup leading to nowhere... COnnected to a random water wheel...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

In other news, A cavy pup has been missing for a week. Oh well... They don't even taste good. SPeaking of animals, I ordered EVERY dog to become BADASS WAR DOGS! EVERY ELF WILL TREMBLE AT OUR HOUNDS! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

[highmax28]

5th of Granite, 255
I found that our military is too busy to go train because they are overburdned with normal work... I say TO HELL WITH YOUR WORK! I SAY YOU ALL GRAB A WEAPON AND TRAIN!!!!!!!!!

6th of Granite, 255
I was approached by the Baron who was armed in battle clothes and complained to me he shouldn't be in the army, but governing. I was going to tell him to suck it up but I didn't have my sword on me... Peregar did, so I told him to go back and do his baron thingy he does... Whimp...

8th of Granite, 255
A carp just drowned... Thats right, drowned... WTF??? I also counted 37 in our military. That should be plenty if we can whip the non-vanguards into shape! Maybe Wrex can finally earn his worth of that silver mail

[MrWillsauce]

Either it air drowned or maybe it got its innards screwed up and suffocated just like Dwarves do when their lungs are injured.

[Wrex]

5th of Granite, 255
I found that our military is too busy to go train because they are overburdned with normal work... I say TO HELL WITH YOUR WORK! I SAY YOU ALL GRAB A WEAPON AND TRAIN!!!!!!!!!

6th of Granite, 255
I was approached by the Baron who was armed in battle clothes and complained to me he shouldn't be in the army, but governing. I was going to tell him to suck it up but I didn't have my sword on me... Peregar did, so I told him to go back and do his baron thingy he does... Whimp...

8th of Granite, 255
A carp just drowned... Thats right, drowned... WTF??? I also counted 37 in our military. That should be plenty if we can whip the non-vanguards into shape! Maybe Wrex can finally earn his worth of that silver mail

Silver mail that I specifically removed from circulation because it was bad, bad armour. The non vanguards are sepcifically non vanguards because it's a workaround to arm civillians! Making them all hammerlords will only from a massive drag on our economy.

[highmax28]

13th of Granite, 255
We got a problem:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

First the copper shrimp, NOW THIS! A salt blob! If only my sword could peirce them... But I can't kill an inorganic being... But I'LL FIND A WAY! AND I'LL BATHE IN ITS BLOOD! Wait... BOTH OF THEM ARE IN THE SAME CAVERNS! I smell WAR!!!!! A WAR OF GODS!!!!!!!

In other news, another carp drowned. And also its taking a blacksmith days to haul up the Barons stupidly heavy, solid gold Sarchophagus. Hes finally halfway there and he was at a quarter when I started. Oh, and the Vanguards are sparring, KEEP AT IT VANGUARDS! And also I stripped the elves of all thier belongings so they can be sacrificed in my tomb so I can tear them apart and drink their blood! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!

15th of Granite, 255
I have completed the Military training camp finally! EVERYONE GET COZY! THERES 37 OF US AND SEVERAL SPACES FOR US TO WORK WITH! YOU THERE CLOWN! PULL THAT LEVER!
*old cranking mechanisms that have been ignored with age begin to turn again, shooting up spears from below the militarys feet*
YES! SWEET PAIN!!!!!!!

16th of Granite, 255
A soldier's baby was impaled. Oh well. Some of the people who were forcefully recuited are mad they witnessed a death, but I'm used to it. Everyone here is. The mother and father aren't too happy either. If they start to flail about in anger, they're in a room trapped with all of us soldiers... This is in our favor

On a better note, a soldier has become a hammerlord. Well done! NOW KEEP SWINGING THAT THING BEFORE I STAB YOU!!!!

A militia captain has also begun taking hits to his heart by the spears... Who made him captain again? It sure as Hell wasn't me!

Oh, and another soldier has become a swordmaster. KEEP SWINGING THAT SWORD!

Uh oh... I think I pissed him off WAAAAYYYYY too much!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I sent in Wrex ALONE to go deal with him. I think I'm the last guy he wants to see. Plus I'd probably just lop his head off

I also noticed several people became hammerdwarves. KEEP AT IT YOU DAMNED RECUITS!

17th of Granite, 255
Actually, make that an EXPLOSION of hammerdwarves. We have 19 hammerdwarves now, and 2 recuits... This... IS A VICTORIOUS DAY! I HAVE TRAINED PEASANTS INTO WARRIORS! PRAISE THE GODS OF WAR!!!!!

I called back Wrex, so far, Peregar hasen't done anything except run around and rip off his clothes... Harmless right?

On a better note, a dwarf became an axe lord. COME ON VANGUARDS! YOU CAN GET UP THERE! KEEP AT IT!

19th of Granite, 255
A dwarf has become a spearmaster. VANGUARDS ARE UNBREAKABLE! WE ARE VANGUARDS! HEAR OUR NAME AND TREMBLE!

21st of Granite, 255
I have mastered the art of the sword. I AM NOW A TRUE CHAMPION!!!!! FEAR ME ELVES!!! I SHALL HUNT YOU ALL LIKE THE DOGS YOU ARE!!!!!

22nd of Granite, 255
Remember that poor old dog that got attacked by grasshopper men back in the first year of the fortress'es existance? Well, the bitch is alive AND SHE JUST GAVE BIRTH TO PUPPIES. That there, is a bitch NOBODY FUCKS WITH. I shall take her under my wing once she's a trained war hound

One of the hammerdwarves walked away after the spears broke her hand. Stupid recuit, IF YOU CANT TAKE THE SHOTS, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE ENLISTED!!!!!

ATTENTION SOLDIERS! WE HAVE A BREACH IN THE CAVERNS! TAKE OUT THAT GIANT BAT BEFORE IT KILLS SOMETHING IMPORTANT! Wrex, go proove your worthy! I'm sending in your platoon!

[/img]

On a good note, MACE LORD!!!! Oh, and a boar suffocated after being trapped in the training camp

On another bad note, the Giant Bat pretty much ate the leg of a dog and left it there...

24th of Granite, 255
The giant bat got away unfortunatley, but if it shows its ugly face, we'll be ready! I WILL FEAST ON GIANT BAT SOMEDAY!!!

25th of Granite, 255
A hammerdwarf is throwing a tantrum. This could proove... QUITE PERFECT!!!! WE NEED LIVE PRACTICE! HACK AT THAT DWARF THERE YOU DOGS! I WANT TO SEE BLOOD STAINS!

26th of Granite, 255
THAT STUPID TANTRUMING DWARF CAME INTO THE CAMP AND DESTROYED ONE OF OUR SPEARS! EXECUTE THE DAMN BITCH! I've set her up on the bridge so she can fall to her death and DROWN! DIE YOU DESTRUCTIVE BITCH DIE!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!!

27th of Granite, 255
She realised the error of her ways... Shes calmed down... But too late... Now she must die... Goodbye stupid wench... Hehehehehehehe...

I also reaslised there are several Hammerdwarves incapacitated... Damn recuits... Think they can sleep on the damn job... WAKE UP! Oh you got broken bones? WHERES THE CHEIF MEDICAL DWARF!? In training? GET HIM OUT OF THERE! GET HIM IN THE HOSPITAL WORKING ON PEOPLE!!!!!

3rd of Slate
I noticed also that anything THAT IS NOT A VANGUARD is a HAMMERDWARF. WTF!!?!?! Get some variety! I'm going to disband all of them except the Vanguards so I can properly equip them. They don't seem to understand "HEAVY ARMOR"

I'm renaming the new squads also. First Highmax's Vanguards. Secondly, Wrex's "Badasses" (So he can feel proud), The Holy Hammers and the Mighty Hammers. We have MANY MANY MANY HAMMERDWARVES, so lets try some variety now, shall we?

We also learned a few facts about giant coyote training... What good is that gonig to do us!?!!?!?! SERIOUSLY!!!!

6th of Slate, 255
The stupid lady wont go on the bridge, she would rather stand there and do nothing... Oh well, she can suffer standing there. I got the chains in my tomb set up, not to chain the elves so I may slaughter them and stain my tomb in blood so my soul will always bask in the gloriousness THAT IS ELVES BLOOD! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

7th of Slate, 255
For some reason, people are enjoying a nice swim... GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASSES! GET OUT OF THAT PIT, AND WORK!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

11th Slate, 255
IT IS DONE! HAHAHAH! THE WENCH THAT HAS DESTROYED PART OF THE CAMP IS NOW DROWNING! HAHHAHAHA!!!! LET HER BE FED TO THE CARP AND HARASSED BY THOSE SPIRITS! DIE BITCH DIE!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! Wait... NOOOOOO!!!! SHE CAN SWIM! No matter, shes going to die from starvation. Much more painful... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

And the elf arrives... Time to slaughter!! *rips oppen the prisoner's guts and severs foot* FEEL THE PAIN!!!!! *continues to tear elf apart with sword, severing the leg* BLOOD BLOOD! MORE BLOOD!!!!!! *stabs in the forehead* now the room has blood splattered on it... More, I NEED MORE!!! But I'll wait... I want the next elf chained up here and suffering!

13th of Slate, 255
WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE ESCAPED!?!?!?! ARGH! That wench that evaed execution swam out and lived the execution! I WANT HER DEAD!!!  YOU HEAR ME!!??!! DEAD!!!!

OOC: Well, I'm done for the night, I'm tired, and LOTS to work on! Plus I'm lagging pretty badly so In the time I could've gotten a half year done, I got like what, not even two months? This may be a long turn...

[highmax28]

5th of Granite, 255
I found that our military is too busy to go train because they are overburdned with normal work... I say TO HELL WITH YOUR WORK! I SAY YOU ALL GRAB A WEAPON AND TRAIN!!!!!!!!!

6th of Granite, 255
I was approached by the Baron who was armed in battle clothes and complained to me he shouldn't be in the army, but governing. I was going to tell him to suck it up but I didn't have my sword on me... Peregar did, so I told him to go back and do his baron thingy he does... Whimp...

8th of Granite, 255
A carp just drowned... Thats right, drowned... WTF??? I also counted 37 in our military. That should be plenty if we can whip the non-vanguards into shape! Maybe Wrex can finally earn his worth of that silver mail

Silver mail that I specifically removed from circulation because it was bad, bad armour. The non vanguards are sepcifically non vanguards because it's a workaround to arm civillians! Making them all hammerlords will only from a massive drag on our economy.

We have enough things to work on our economy, we have everything on overtime to make gold bars, I'm hoping for a road paved with gold crossing the river.

Also am I making it too overdramatic? I think the bloodlust act is pretty creepy... A little too creepy