TAKE THE BELLADONA, THEN DRINK VAMPIRE BLOOD.
(1) BELLADONNA IS POISONOUS TO WEREWOLVES, REMEMBER? IT KILLS YOU.
CRAP.
THAT IS NOT AN ACTION.
REPAIR APERTURE SCIENCE AND DETERMINE STATE OF LABORATORIES. WITHOUT DESTROYING THEM.
(5) APERTURE IS BACK UP AND RUNNING!
INFECT THE LICHETTE WITH SEPSIS, E. COLI, EBOLA, MALARIA, DEATHITIS, ADDITIONAL NECROSIS, PHYLACTERYSHATTERINGITIS, AND SUPER TAPEWORMS WITH THE PIECES OF ME STILL IN HER. REMAINING PIECES OF ME, REFORM INTO THE SHAPE OF MARCELINE'S DAD FROM ADVENTURE TIME AND GO TO THE PICNIC AND EAT EVERYONE ELSES FRIES.
(5+2vs2+3+2) YOU INFECT A DEAD BEING WITH DISEASES. SHE JUST KIND OF LOOKS MAD, THEN INGESTS GREEN STARS PEPTO BISMOL. IT'S ODDLY EFFECTIVE, LIKELY DUE TO THE DRUG DOING WIERD THINGS TO UNDEAD.
OFFER LICHETTE SOME PEPTO BISMOL, JUST IN CASE. FROM AFAR, OF COURSE. OR THROUGH DIRG. CHANGE RADIO STATION.
(4) YOU GIVE LICHETTE PEPTO-BISMOL, BY HURLING IT AT HER. (3) YOU CHANGE THE CHANNEL, AND IT BECOMES 80'S POP.
Still partying? Or is something sinister going down?
If still partying, eat all the delicious foods possible. If sinister things are going down, steal Greenstar's sword. If successful stealing Greenstar's sword, hand it back, because I have no idea what I'd do with it even if I had it. hold onto it. Tightly.
(2) YOU EAT ALL THE SWORDS POSSIBLE. THAT WOULD BE NONE, SO YOU ARE NOW SLOWLY STARVING TO DEATH.
>SUMMON HORDES OF THE VOID TO PARTAKE IN THE FOOD ANNIHILATION AND PUNCTURE ALL THE TIRES OF YOINK'S WMD-BIKE
>ALSO, SHOVE BANANA IN THE EXHAUST PIPE AND RETURN TO FIRST FORM
(5vs3+3) YOU TRY TO SLASH THE TIRES, BUT YOU FORGOT THAT STEP ONE IS TO ENSURE THE BIKE IS NOT MOVING DURING THE SLASHING. YOU MISS BY A MILE. (4vs1+3) YOU THEN FOLLOW UP THE SLASH MISS WITH A BANANA TOSS. IT GETS STUCK IN THE EXAUST PIPE, BUT YOINK HITS THE BADASS FIRE TRIGGER, AND IT INCINERATES THE BANANA!
RECALIBRATE LIGHTSABERS TO ROCKETS THAT I PRESUME ARE STILL ATTATCHED TO MY HEAD. CHASE YOINK.
AID ACTION
VIDEOTAPE ACTION.
(5+1) YOU CREATE CRAZY FETISH PORN ON ACCIDENT! YOU ARE SURROUNDED BY STUDIOS WHO SAW YOUR DEMO TAPE AND ARE INTERESTED.
Join Yoink on his journey to the hospital.
"The Kitten Collective apologizes for the anti-lich comment. That was Marvin's fault. Rogue components can be difficult to reign in."
(6) YOU FOLLOW YOINK TO THE HOSPITAL, WHERE YOU CONSUME PATIENTS INTO THE HORDE. THE DOCTORS DON'T LIKE THAT.
SINATRA:
The girl awoke at Sinatras feet, and looked around in a panic. She started to run, but fell onto her face. Sinatra opens his eyes and gives a quizzical expression.
"You might be a little disconcerted."
BOSS TURNS
PALADIN
"Huh? Well then. Uhh. Don't, really now what to say right now. Umm.
Oh wait, I have a joke. A man gets pulled over for speeding. The sheriff ambles up, asks for license and registration. 'I'm afraid I don't have it,' the man replies sheepishly. 'Why not?' asks the cop. 'I, uh, think I left it at the bar. I get forgetful after a couple of drinks.' 'Sir, I'm going to need you to step out of the car." "No can do, sir. I stand up and the .45's gonna fall right outta my waistband.' The cop is almost livid by now. 'Son, what the hell wrong with you? What are you carrying around a loaded gun for?' 'Well, the hooker's not gonna force herself into the trunk now, will she?' By now the sheriff is on the horn for backup, and half the city has arrived, complete with swat team and the Chief. As they've finished tearing his car apart and the guy is face down in the road in handcuffs, he turns to the Chief and says 'Lemme guess. He probably told you I was speeding, too?'
In conclusion, Trolololo.Tip your waitress. Oh wait, no waitresses. *under breath* What a shitty party. I've had drunken nights in vegas better then this*to audience* So, um, Well then, I guess the only thing to do is throw your wallets at me. Thank you, Good Night!"
My undead armies crash the party, consuming much food and beverage. I do action I mentioned earlier.
SANDWICH FOR REFERENCE:
Mmm, Bacon. Eat bacon. Bacon bacon bacon. I love it so. Find place where they give out the meat. Create large subway sandwich. Sandwich must include:
-Pepperoni
-Mozzerella
-Meatballs
-Crispy Bacon strips
-American Cheese
-Meat Sauce
-Chicken patties
-Blood Pressure pills
On Italian herbs and cheese bread.
Uh, wait.
Also do stand up comedy. Summon The Spirit of Groucho Marx to aid me.
EVILIDEAEDIT: One last thing. Hire a group of performers, and have them do the play "The King In Yellow". Make sure to get saner members of my team elsewhere by Act 2. Wikipedia the play if you need too.
(6+3) THE UNDEAD WRAITHS OF WW2 CRASH THE PICNIC! THEY LOOK DOUBLE UNDEAD! (6+3) THE PERFORMERS APPEAR, AND PERFORM "THE KING IN YELLOW" IT INDUCED INSANITY! SO... NOTHING MUCH CHANGED.
DRUNKS
"WAIT A MINUTE
THAT WASN'T EVEN A HOT CURRY
I SUSPECT... FOUL PLAY!"
>CHECK IF WMD-BIKE HAS ATTACHED BATHROOM/TOILET
>IF NOT, SCAVENGE TOILET CUBICLE FROM DINER, ATTACH TO SIDE OF BIKE
>ALSO GET SPRAY BOTTLE OF AIR-FRESHENER FROM SOMEWHERE
>THEN SPEED LICHETTE (AND PROBABLY DIRG) TO NEAREST EMERGENCY ROOM, UTTERING WITTY REMARK ALONG WAY
"I'LL BE BACK IN A MO'
SAVE SOME WEDGES FOR ME GUYS"
Still partying? Or is something sinister going down?
If still partying, eat all the delicious foods possible. If sinister things are going down, steal Greenstar's sword. If successful stealing Greenstar's sword, hand it back, because I have no idea what I'd do with it even if I had it.SLASH THE TIRES ON YOINK'S WHAMBULANCE
GODDAMIT JUST DO THIS WITH THE SWORD
NO. WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?
>DRIVE OVER THE PHYSICAL MANIFESTATION OF XANTALOS'S ARROGANCE ON WAY TO HOSPITAL
>BANTER WITH LICHETTE TO TAKE MIND OFF OF BOWELS:
"HEY, YOU REMEMBER BACK WHEN I WAS TRYING TO KILL YOU?
NOW I'M HELPING YOU GUYS OUT
CRAZY STUFF, HUH?!"
(3+3) IT DOES. IT'S A GLORIOUS BATHROOM, OF COURSE. (5+3) THEN, YOU THROW DIRG AND LICHETTE ONTO THE BIKE, AND DRIVE TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM. ON THE WAY THERE, YOU BRING UP SOME SMALL TALK.
"HEY, YOU REMEMBER BACK WHEN I WAS TRYING TO KILL YOU?
NOW I'M HELPING YOU GUYS OUT
CRAZY STUFF, HUH?!"
Lichette looks rather distracted, and diahhrea infected while she says
"Yes, that is rather unusual..."
WHEN YOU GET TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM, THEY REMOVE THE VARIOUS BACTERIUM. ALSO, THEY TAKE OUT THE PEPTO BISMOL BOTTLE, WHICH REALLY WASN'T DOING MUCH.
Romantic:
Lichette is busy, being operating on and farting poop.
Commentary
This is what I said originally for Lichettes turn: Lichette is busty, being operating on and farting poop.
Romantics:
Leader: Lichette +3
Lieutenant: Dirg +2,
Legions:
The Kitten Collective shall join the Time lords. Due to agreeing with 'good for the sake of good'. Also, we shall coalesce into a humanoid form. For convenience. And we shall attempt to halt the presidential debates in an attempt to weaken Misko.
The Kitten Collective recently rescinded its alliance with the Time Lords due to insanity on the part of the (Former) Doctor.
The Kitten Collective shall side with the Lichette due to her desire to create an everlasting world of beauty and creation.
((@Miauw62: You're not alone, dude. He missed me as well.))
Cross the male lich with Taveros (I want his horns too) and you have me. The lich's subconscious (unofficially).
Also I will Liberaly kick you ass.
Question, can I have my sword? The one I crafted, and the golem took?
And I'm Liberal.
I THINK SPINAL_TAPER IS GONNA TAKE A FEW WEEKS TO ROLL ALL THE ACTIONS.
Keep talking Miskos, for it shall make it all the easier to reach down your throat and yank out the sad remains of your heart.
Form: I am all. I am that which lies beyond the horizon; that which collapses the ground underneath you, the ones who wait beyond the veil. I lie in the recesses of sentience's souls; I am the voice in the back of your mind urging you to steal, to hurt, to kill. I rot trees and crumble mountains. I consume stars with my passing; I warp existence by existing. I am the threads that bind your shells together, the one that watches and waits for the time of destruction to arrive. And now it has. I sally forth, and my very presence is anathema to your being. I have seen universes come and go, and this one will not last. Whatever you do, whoever you pray to, if I am not them, they will submit or cease to exist. I am your doom. I am all. I. Am. Xantalos.
Faction: I serve none; I come to destroy the love inherent in the corpse-bitch, and then her - no more. Ally with me as you see fit - it will not change the result.
Paladins:
Leader: Misko +3
Lieutenant: Xantalos +2
Legions:
I am: A giant dragon-robot with lots of neat weapons and powerful magic. Also the pope of the reformed Miskopalian church.
I am a Moderate.
I will convince the lichette and Dirg to get married in the Miskopalian church I set up at Aperture Science.
So, we all agree that both slashfic and misko need to die?
Agreed. The collective rescinds it previous alliance with the Doctor due to his descent into madness. We also propose the formation of a temporary alliance to combat this menace.
We shall call it Those Who Oppose Crazy Shit, or TWOCS for short.
This one shall join this alliance if only to speed up annihilation. Slashfics are the spawn of creation and they inspire more creation. They must be annihilated.
Lichette means to create an everlasting world of beauty and creation. Join us. (Conservative/Eldritch) We oppose lichette and therefore the very act of creation itself. With you at our side, none can stand against us!
Eldritch creature makes good point. Rescinding TWOCS alliance, this one joins Conservative. On the condition that the democrats are handed over to this one.
Oh fine....
MY FINAL FORM SHALL BE.....DWARF FORTRESS 1.0 (!!!!!!)
Oh and on the Conservative side, because its the dickish thing to do at this point.
STOP SUPPORTING THE LICHETTE, SHE IS EVIL.
Final Form: Demonic Werewolf.
There is no good. There is no evil, there is only the strong, and the weak. There is only power, and those too weak to sieze it. There is no love, there is only anger. There is no joy, there is only sorrow. There is no hope, there is only hate. All the talk of order, peace, and beauty is merely madmen scrabbling desprately to avoid the truth: That we are the cruel ones, the destroyers of life. We meddle in things we don't understand, for the sake of those not yet born, and for what? Nothing but petty squabbles over dogma. The Madness must end!
His endless chatter grates upon my nerves. I have grown tired of this game.
Annihilate Misko. If successful, join Xantalos. If fails, stay on the Liberal team.
Wat:bukkitdinos
ok
i am no longer the docter
im too insane for that role.
FINAL FINAL FORM: A DEMONIC CHIA PET
faction: none
(6) YOU TAKE THE FORM OF A DEMONIC CHIA PET. A SUCCUBUS CHIA PET. EWW...
THE DRUNKEN FOOLS
YOINK, THE DESTINED/DRUNKEN ONE +2
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS GOING ON
BUT I AM NOT IN ANY OF THE 100+ LISTS OF PLAYERS/FACTIONS 
CO-PILOT SIDECAR.
BY DOING SO, JOIN DRUNKEN FOOLS TEAM.
CO-CO-PILOT SIDECAR. ALSO JOIN DRUNKEN FOOLS I GUESS.
(i still have no idea whats going on, i cant be arsed to read 3 pages filled with ranting.)
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Topic: HERO CIVIL WAR (YOU AT FINAL BOSS PART 2): Dat Countdown: (.5) (Read 650089 times)