Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Radiant_Phoenix]

So, I've been mucking around with a modded race in fortress mode, and something's bugging me:

Even though eight goblins in iron gear are no match for a single no-skill naked adult member of this race, a single goblin snatcer still manage to abduct the children with little fuss, despite the children being very nearly as large as the adults. How does that work?

[Maynot]

Goblins have dimensional bags of holding?

[Naryar]

So, I've been mucking around with a modded race in fortress mode, and something's bugging me:

Even though eight goblins in iron gear are no match for a single no-skill naked adult member of this race, a single goblin snatcer still manage to abduct the children with little fuss, despite the children being very nearly as large as the adults. How does that work?

Easy enough, goblin snatchers just need to touch children to pick them up, and their bag is of infinite size.

[wierd]

Goblinclaus and his magic bag......

Except he doesn't take them to the north pole.

[Naryar]

Also, the rule of drama. They're children, they're supposed to be cared for (note that there's a big supposed there, being on the bay12 forums), and they are supposed to make us feel bad if something bad happens to them.

Hence, the rule of drama contractually obliges children to be caught by babysnatchers, even if the babysnatcher is a goblin and the child is a minotaur.

[coolio678]

what race would this be, exactly?

[KodKod]

Children! Ice cream, lolipops, and all free!

[wierd]

Wow. He's a real looker.....

Not green enough for goblinclaus though.

[KodKod]

Wow. He's a real looker.....
Not green enough for goblinclaus though.

If you're a kid the Childcatcher is the most terrifying villain ever created. Goblins got nothing on him.

[wierd]

Sadly he falls victim to the inverse of the "good is beautiful" trope in that performance.

The most terrifying is when the child snatcher is neither beautiful, nor ugly. Just ordinary. It implies that ordinary people are the villain, and that you can trust no one.

[KodKod]

Sadly he falls victim to the inverse of the "good is beautiful" trope in that performance.

You could have just linked directly to it.

The most terrifying is when the child snatcher is neither beautiful, nor ugly. Just ordinary. It implies that ordinary people are the villain, and that you can trust no one.

Just like real life, you never know who could be a psychopathic murder killer leading a double life. Perhaps even someone you know. I've experienced similar things first hand.

[wierd]

Preaching to the choir sister. Preaching to the choir.

Also, the "evil makes you ugly" trope isn't quite the inverse of "good is beautiful."  The first states causation. The latter implies universal axiomatic truth. That's why I didn't link it. Pedantry and all that.

I remember my grandmother telling me stories about people in the ukraine, who resorted to snatching and eating children by turning them into sausages during one of stalin's purges. She said it was terrible, because the only sign that they were snatchers was that they weren't starving like everyone else.  That mental picture always stuck.

[Bihlbo]

I think it's likely the goblin only needs to whisper the words, "If you get in the sack, you don't have to live here anymore," and job's done.

[Corai]

I think it's likely the goblin only needs to whisper the words, "If you get in the sack, you don't have to live here anymore," and job's done.

That doesn't apply to fortresses that care for children though. INVALID.

[KodKod]

That doesn't apply to fortresses elven forest retreats that care for children though. INVALID.

Fixed that for you.