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Author Topic: You Have (an axe instead of) a Gun  (Read 19403 times)

Gotdamnmiracle

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You Have (an axe instead of) a Gun
« on: March 21, 2012, 01:18:46 pm »
You are in a grocery store. The place is absolutely packed. You have a gun in your right hand.

"Ohmygod! He's got a gun!"

Defuse the situation.
« Last Edit: March 22, 2012, 01:22:46 pm by Gotdamnmiracle »
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Quote from: Mr. Palau on March 24, 2012, 08:45:34 am
Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

Flying Dice

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2012, 01:42:02 pm »
"No! It isn't a gun! It's... uh, a double-headed dildo?"
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Aurora on small monitors:
1. Game Parameters -> Reduced Height Windows.
2. Lock taskbar to the right side of your desktop.
3. Run Resize Enable

Fniff

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #2 on: March 21, 2012, 01:44:05 pm »
Fire.
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Gotdamnmiracle

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #3 on: March 21, 2012, 01:45:38 pm »
"Jesus christ! It's a pervert with a gun!" a morbidly obese woman yells. The crowd seems to turn into utter chaos, spilling fruit and vegetables all over (it being the produce section and all).

"Well this stick up is off to a bad start." You mutter to yourself under your breath.

You see multiple people on their cell phones, chattering all at once.
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Quote from: Mr. Palau on March 24, 2012, 08:45:34 am
Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

The Fool

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #4 on: March 21, 2012, 01:46:40 pm »
Walk up to the counter. "I ain't looking for no handouts! I'm looking for a ****** ******* job!"
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Steam ID: The Fool [B12]
A Flexible Mind (Suggestion Game)

Gotdamnmiracle

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #5 on: March 21, 2012, 01:48:24 pm »
You point at the woman and pull the trigger. Nothing.

Did I forget to load this thing this morning? Yes. Ohboy.
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Quote from: Mr. Palau on March 24, 2012, 08:45:34 am
Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

Gotdamnmiracle

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #6 on: March 21, 2012, 01:51:14 pm »
You stroll over to the counter and tell the teen aged boy with a depressing beard and a fatal case of acne what you want.

He cowers in fear and asks "What was that last part, sir? I don't understand." His sentence is punctuated in a crack.
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Quote from: Mr. Palau on March 24, 2012, 08:45:34 am
Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

Flying Dice

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #7 on: March 21, 2012, 02:00:56 pm »
"Hey, it's the fuzz!"

Point off towards the far side of the store and run outside. Keep running. Once away from the store, ditch the gun somewhere well hidden.
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Aurora on small monitors:
1. Game Parameters -> Reduced Height Windows.
2. Lock taskbar to the right side of your desktop.
3. Run Resize Enable

Mr. Palau

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #8 on: March 21, 2012, 02:03:25 pm »
Quote from: Flying Dice on March 21, 2012, 02:00:56 pm
"Hey, it's the fuzz!"

Point off towards the far side of the store and run outside. Keep running. Once away from the store, ditch the gun somewhere well hidden.
No run and keep the gun, if they find it they can use it to track us down!
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Quote from: greatorder on May 20, 2012, 01:28:54 pm
you can't just go up to people and get laid.

Gotdamnmiracle

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #9 on: March 21, 2012, 02:09:50 pm »
"Aww man fuck this noise. I'm out of here."

You take off at a sprint out of the store.

Gone. Home free. All down hill from- WHACK.

As if in slow motion your foot hits a cement parking median. You fly. Houston we have a problem. Well, now at least you know what a parking lot tastes like.

Sirens sound off in the distance.
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Quote from: Mr. Palau on March 24, 2012, 08:45:34 am
Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

The Fool

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #10 on: March 21, 2012, 02:16:05 pm »
You've had a taste of pavement. Now you can't get enough of it! Eat all of the pavement!

All joking aside, get up and start running again. Make sure you still have your pistol.
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Steam ID: The Fool [B12]
A Flexible Mind (Suggestion Game)

TCM

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #11 on: March 21, 2012, 02:28:35 pm »
Try not to be a muscular Black or Latino man. Try your best to be an young, attractive blonde woman.


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Quote from: Empiricist on March 28, 2016, 09:18:28 pm
Because trying to stuff Fate/Whatever's engrish and the title of a 17th century book on statecraft into Pokemon syntax tends to make the content incomprehensible.

The Fool

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #12 on: March 21, 2012, 02:29:33 pm »
Quote from: TCM on March 21, 2012, 02:28:35 pm
Try not to be a muscular Black or Latino man. Try your best to be an young, attractive blonde woman.

Agreed.
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Steam ID: The Fool [B12]
A Flexible Mind (Suggestion Game)

Gotdamnmiracle

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #13 on: March 21, 2012, 02:33:47 pm »
You stand up and dust yourself off. You take a deep breath, clear your mind, focus all of your ki, feng shui your house, delve into the deepest parts of your mind, and spit up a little. When you open your eyes you have transformed! Kinda...

Your torso is the only portion that has changed, into a nice natural C-cup, I might add, and a very trim abdomen. Aside from that you you are all scruffy and latino man. Pencil mustache included.
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Quote from: Mr. Palau on March 24, 2012, 08:45:34 am
Go back see if he's there and run him over, and drink his gun!

piecewise

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Re: You Have a Gun
« Reply #14 on: March 21, 2012, 02:38:30 pm »
Quote from: Gotdamnmiracle on March 21, 2012, 02:33:47 pm
You stand up and dust yourself off. You take a deep breath, clear your mind, focus all of your ki, feng shui your house, delve into the deepest parts of your mind, and spit up a little. When you open your eyes you have transformed! Kinda...

Your torso is the only portion that has changed, into a nice natural C-cup, I might add, and a very trim abdomen. Aside from that you you are all scruffy and latino man. Pencil mustache included.
Remove shirt
Fondle self till police arrive
Scream "I am the next stage in human evolution! Bow before by hermaphroditic glory!"
Use resulting stunned silence to hop into a police car and drive toward the state line.
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