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Wait for the next release. I want usable mugs damn it!

55 (71.4%)

We can use the current one. I like the big trees and slightly smarter dorfs.

17 (22.1%)

I'll take .34.11 thanks. I want to know I'll get to kill things for sure.

5 (6.5%)

Total Members Voted: 77

[Xahnel]

Is epicness a good word for it

Thanks, hans. I get confused easily.

[Splint]

I do have a few ideas though.

Ballpoint: Near monopoly on larger aircraft and combat aircraft. Moderate number of hypercompetant Security Contractors. Advanced weaponry based off magnetic accelerator technology.

Parasol: Large numbers of "unaffiliated" PMC forces, masking thier involvment in most matters. Does posses heavy armor to make up for thier lack of airpower. Has advanced weaponry (LASER and Mag-Cel)

Eris: Large numbers of fanatically loyal infantry forces and large numbers of medium armor(IFVs/APCs) equipped to fight both heavy armor and airpower. Like Parasol and Ballpoint, they posses magnetic accelerator weapons.

Stone INC: Limited numbers of thier own Contractors. Deploying forces to the city to protect company investments. Again, posses advanced weapon systems, though thiers is of thier own make.

Sewaturet: Global Coalition capitol. Controls the largest highways in the thier part of the world, requiring ground-restricted forces to take the city to do anything else. Compared to most coporate forces, thier equiment is outdated, but have large numbers of Self-Propelled artillary units and numerous small attack aircraft/dropships. Uses outdated propellant driven projectile weapons, except on thier heavy armor units.

These factors will lead to a class 5 clusterfuck.

[Xahnel]

You forgot spearbreakers, and our magical spell to summon Godzilla and Mothra AND Mecha Godzilla to stomp all over our other enemies then kick each other around, then get pointysticked to death by Fischer, AKA Superdorf.

EDIT: Seriously, Splint, i cannot believe you forgot the number one mathematical rule of Spearbreakers: +1 mug for all equations.

[Splint]

Spearbreakers has long been destroyed/abandoned by this point in time. It considered a dingey depressing blight on the surface of the world.

[Hanslanda]

Spearbreakers is by definition doomed to failure and destruction at the hands of our enemies. This is Dwarf Fortress. You do not win. You do not conquer. You survive, for a time. Perhaps you even build a mighty fortress, untouched by the blades of your foes, unconquerable and invulnerable. Even then the FPS death is always slowly creeping toward you, carried on the backs of cats and stones and blood smears, biding it's time.
Losing is fun.

[Xahnel]

HERESY! ELF! Spearbreakers shall never fall! Because unlike other forts, we aren't doing stupid things that practically require Critical Existance Failure.

Like lava cannons.

Or mega projects.

Or forgetting which lever does what.

Or unlocking the clown car.

Or allowing animals to breed uncontrollably.

Or not cleaning up after ourselves.

Zap Branigan ran our fort, and it survived. Sounds like a good bet to me.

[Splint]

We haven't done any megaprojects because the spawn would keep killing workers. I mean the closest I've done is my overland stature garden and that's only taking a long time because FPS is still on the slow side (and someone I assigned to make some glass blocks hasn't.)

[Hanslanda]

HERESY! ELF! Spearbreakers shall never fall! Because unlike other forts, we aren't doing stupid things that practically require Critical Existance Failure.

Like lava cannons.

Or mega projects.

Or forgetting which lever does what.

Or unlocking the clown car.

Or allowing animals to breed uncontrollably.

Or not cleaning up after ourselves.

Zap Branigan ran our fort, and it survived. Sounds like a good bet to me.

...
We have a megaproject dodge-trap hallway that consists of roughly a thousand upright iron spikes linked to a single lever.
As of this moment, Splint is probably the only person who knows what ANY of the levers do, much less all of them.
It was fully within the plan to unlock the clown car within the next five-ish year/turns.
Splint spent the first half of his turn trying to clean up the gigantic fucking mess right outside the doorway, mostly consisting of corpses, undead corpses, and the gear those corpses dropped, as well as gear our fallen dwarves had left outside.

And I like elves and heresy.

[Splint]

Now that I think of it, the spikewalk does count as a megaproject. And a utilitarian one at that! Cause that took what, the better part of someone's turn to build?

[Xahnel]

The spike trap has a use, unlike most megaprojects, therefore was worth the risk. Besides, i wouldn't qualify useful things as megaprojects, because the ones i've seen are overcomplicated and broken, or a giant blue middle finger.

Both Splints are happy to remind you what the levers they know do, and as for the mystery ones, i'm more than happy to look em up.

We haven't done it yet, so it counts as not doing the stupid.

No other fort i've read about bothered to make the attempt to clean.

I like certain elves.

[Hanslanda]

Now that I think of it, the spikewalk does count as a megaproject. And a utilitarian one at that! Cause that took what, the better part of someone's turn to build?

I believe it was either Talvieno or Draignean, but my memory has been seriously negatively affected by sobriety.

[Corai]

Now that I think of it, the spikewalk does count as a megaproject. And a utilitarian one at that! Cause that took what, the better part of someone's turn to build?

I believe it was either Talvieno or Draignean, but my memory has been seriously negatively affected by sobriety.

I'll take the mission of finding the turn it was made. I'll get my scuba diving equipment.

And elves are my favorite trading partners.

[Splint]

I need to test a few to see if my memory is any good. And I need to find them.  Honestly the only reson I restored functionality to the old entry was because I don't know where the levers are (or more likely, I looked right at the damn things and din't see them.)

I don't like elves for the sole reason that I don't make bins very often anymore. They often provide a yearly import of much needed cloth though so normally I let them live.

[Xahnel]

It was finished in draig's turn. He tried to use it on the spawn, combined with dodging mechanics. Needless to say, they didn't dodge. So, either it was started the turn before, or he did the whole thing.

[Mr Frog]

With my superior powers of observation, I detect that Hansie is slightly pissed-off today.

@Xahnel:

At this point, the only thing I've really solidly decided is that if you put any more time travel in the plot then there already is, I will track down every single person who ever posted in this thread and leave a decapitated baby doll on their doorstep. Aside from that, I'm fine with most anything you could do. Just don't expect me to get too involved, as I generally tend to lag a bit behind in terms of story updates, which makes reaction journals difficult.

Incidentally, I noticed a plot hole in my previous update that one could drive a truck through. Can anyone else spot it? (Yes, I will be posting a revised version later.)

E: @Splint:

Sorry to deflate your boner, but Eris is an underground entity that operates covertly. Full-scale armies and overt aggression are both beyond their means and easily-noticeable. Actually, you didn't actually *state* that they had an army, so... derp.