Chapter 27: THIS FUCKING TURN
King Arthur, reclaims his equipment, mounts a horse, and launches a group attack with his
Knights of the Round Table against
Big Sean! (3 vs. 1) Arthur's slashes into Sean's main hull, doing relatively little damage. (2 vs. 4) His Knights charge next, but Big Sean is ready this time! (5 vs. 1) He fills his Machine Gun with Anti-Armor Ammunition, and unloads into the knights! The results are like a 6-year old trying to fight another 6-year old. Except one has a machine gun. Anyways, they all die.
Knights of the Round Table have died!The King is distressed, but the battle must go on. He points at
Deoxys with Excalibur.
"With the power embodied in me from the Lord, my holy blade shall heal thee!" The King tosses the sword at the space Pokemon. (1) The sword impales
Deoxys through his orb. Then, the orb explodes in a giant fireball, taking Deoxys and Excalibur with it.
"....Oh." Then the Anglo-saxon coughs up some blood, his bleeding isn't going so well....
Deoxys has died!Cyan Garamonde charges Piecewise a final time, spinning around and attacking it with a double Katana-horizontal slash! (3 vs. 2) He slightly cuts Piecewise along one of his arms, making a small laceration. Hey, it's something.
"Open fire!" Pinkamena Diane Pie unleashes her Rocket Propelled Chainsaw on Big Sean! (4 vs. 3) The chainsaw flies into Sean's armor, penetrating it slightly! The part that makes it through makes dozens of tiny lacerations on Big's body. Sean roars and pulls it out, crushing it before it does more damage.
The artillery doesn't stop as
Gordon Freeman 2.0 fires his Javelin Rocket Propelled Grenade at
Big Sean! (4 vs. 2) The Grenade explodes against his armor, doing no penetrative damage. However, the force is great, smashing into him, with equal force of an unarmored person being kicked. He recoils some.
Big Sean prepares to finally retaliate, but a
screaming yellow blur of Rage flies towards him! (2+1 Vs. 6) Sean grits his teeth and spins his Drill in front of him as a counter-maneuver! (6 vs. 1-1....oh no.)
Fluttershy comes to her senses just before she meets the drill. She skids to a flying halt as her face comes inches within in the blade.
"But I....*whimper*... She utilizes her ultimate attack!:
Running away and not coming back.Fluttershyhas died! run away crying!Piecewise retaliates against
Cyan Garamonde with a series of blinding talon swipes! (3 vs. 5) The Samurai skillfully blocks all of them with his dual-swords, and as soon as Piecewise hesitates, he counters with his own barrage.
(5 vs. 4) He cuts horizontally along Piecewise's chest, drawing a large amount of blood, and the first decent strike against the Eldrich abomination!
Big Sean decided he was too old and famous for this shit. He was getting blown up and cut and stuff. Everyone fucking died....except for him, the psycho/nympho pink horse, that scientist guy armed with the arsenal of a small country, and Piecewise & the Samurai having some death-match in the corner. He loaded out his final loadout: Harpoon Gun in one hand, Frost Plasmid in the other.
"Which one first..." Sean considered each remaining
H.O.E., causing him to fail to notice the
Mongolian Warriors sneaking behind him. (6 vs. 1) Sean lifted his Harpoon Gun, only to gasp in pain as a group of muscled Mongols ripped it off. Spurts of blood emitted from the torn off wound!
"ARGH, YOU PEASANTS AIN'T SHIT, YOU CAN'T BE COMING ALL LIKE STEALING MY SOPHISTICATED WEAPONRY AND-" Big Sean stopped mid-sentence as he noted the same group of Mongols a few yards away, pointing the loaded Harpoon at him.
"Wait, I'm the King of R.T.D.! I won't lose to my own creation! TCM, reroll!" (Ha vs. Nope)
"Fu-" The Harpoon enters straight through his visor,
the giant lance going straight through his head, imploding it, and out the back of the suit! The Mongols cheer as the Sean Mirrsan lies in his own pool of irony.
Sean Mirrsan defeated!Even with the boss defeated the epic duel of the
Samurai & Piecewise continues! (6 vs. 1)
"GREAT CUTTER!" Cyan slashes Piecewise across the chest, stabs him in the stomach, pelvis, arms, legs, back, head, eyes, etc. and ends up slashing him
53,594 times! Piecewise explodes and the arena goes back for a split second. Kanji appears: "PIECEWISE:DEAD."
Yeahsoitsdoneokay.jpg
Piecewise: A grotesque lanky scare-crow looking figure, wrapped in torn cloth. Around it's midcenter is the phrase printed "TORTUREFORFUN".
Items: Talons
Health: Arm Minor Cut
Pinkamena Diane Pie
Items: Rocket Propelled Chainsaw, Butcher Knife, Scalpel
Health: Fine
Cyan Garamonde
Items: 2 Katanas, Tanto Knife, Samurai Armor, Sniper Camouflage, Light U.S. Armor, Bronze Bars, Fragmentation Grenade
Health: Small Neck Cut, Left Foot Slashed
Gordon Freeman 2.0
Items: Crowbar, Gravity Gun, Fire Crossbow, 1911 Pistol, Handcannon Revolver, Uzi, Laser Rifle, Javelin RPG, Flashbangs, Fragmentation Grenades, ToadyOne's Legendary Longbow
Health: Fine
King Arthur
Items: Chain Mail, Shield
Health: Large Diagonal Chest Cut, Heavy Bleeding
Mongolian Warriors
Equipment: Turkish Sabers, Mongolian Armor
Health: 30/50 Warriors
Woah, that turn. Just....holy...wow.
Follow-up post-battle turn coming tomorrow. I need to go to sleep but...wow....