Chapter 12: Dr. Strange DashHere y'all motherfuckers go.
Cyan Garamonde stands up from
Teddy Roosevelt. He unsheaths his Katana, the blade glowing in the sunlight. He sprints holding the blade by his side, bullets and explosion peppering the battlefield around him. As he reaches the field, he jumps, 80 feet in the air, propelled forward by momentum, and lands on the launch platform. The scientists and engineers scatter.
General MacMiller just grins at him and reaches for his pistol. (6 vs. 4) Cyan rushes him with the blade, and the American general's grin disappears as the samurai slices open his ribcage. Cyan runs past and turns around, ready to make another pass.
Teddy Roosevelt stands up from his prone position.
"You can fool all of the people some of the time, you can fool some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool AMERICA!" Teddy lifts up his rifle barrel, a red, white and blue aura surrounding it. It flashes. (4 vs. 3)
General MacArthur gets shot through the right leg. Teddy shrugs, good enough.
Meanwhile,
Sun Tzu is yelling. Taking out his composite bow, he aims at the hovering bomber and fires an arrow. (5 vs. 4) The arrow goes through the open hull, hits the floor, makes a spark, the spark hits a napalm, and the whole Bomber dissapears in a fireball.
Rainbow Dash is bleeding out onto the ground. Barely moving, she manages to make an utterance: "Not today. I'm no c-coward. I can't die. I refuse. So then, for Equestria, for my friends, and most of all... for my pride." With her last bit of strength, she launches herself up and zooms through the sky, reaching the bomb in a matter of seconds. She grabs it, to the awe of everyone, and pulls it out of the launching pad. This causes it's time to expedite, exploding in just thirty seconds. As the timer ticks down, Dashie is flying through the air, until she reaches the gravational end of the planet. Gripping the nuke by it's pointing top she yells,
"Here goes nothing! RAINBOW. TOSS!" (3) R.D. chucks the bomb and it goes a little far. Everyone on the ground is safe, but with only 5 seconds to go, there's no speed at which she could travel to escape the blast radius. Time slows down.
Rainbow Dash looks at everything around her. The planet. The sun. Space. The stars. She becomes aware of every feeling on her body, from the coldness of the high altitude, to the feelings of every indivdual nerve on her body. This was it. The end.
3....2..... Then a head pops out of the bomb.
"Wurmple." How did he get inside the nuke? No seriously, how? Like I'm the GM and I don't know the logic of my own creation. Anyways, Wurmple is inside the interior of the bomb, and with only one hope of saving his master:
(6)
Wurmple used Tackle!The kinect force of him slamming into the bomb is enough. It lurches, just far enough to keep
Rainbow Dash out of the explosion.
"1....Detonation." There is a brilliant explosion of light as an atomic firecracker lights up the sky of Equestria and all lands to see.
It was super effective.Rainbow stares in awe at the events. However, even though she escaped the blast, the aftershock of the explosion hits her. It doesn't even hurt her, it just sends her sprawling down back into the atmosphere. She hits a cloud with a *pompf*. She tries getting up, but between getting shot, carrying a nuke into space, and getting hit by nuclear aftershock, she's really exhausted. A nap sounds nice. She yawns and closes her eyes.....
Fluttershy stared up at the nuclear blast.
"Oh no, Dashie...please come back safe...." Her attention turned to the men handling the Machine Gun Nest. She sniffles as she flashes back to the horrible deaths her friends have faced at their hands. Tearing up, she sprints towards the nest crying. The soldiers look befuddled at her as she flails around in their nest like she's at a dubstep concert. (5 vs. 1) She her do the dubstep dance makes the soldiers remember how America fell to the youth, what with their electronica, ibooks, and their Snoopy Snoopy Poopy Dog Rap Man. The realization hits them that they need to go back and fix their country, war will never be the answer. They pack up their equipment and leave the battle quitely, leaving
Fluttershy to continue spazzing out in their nest.
There are few men in the world that can intimidate a group of highly trained American death soldiers. And one of those men is a female pink rapist pony. Snatching the shotgun that previously shot into her hind,
Pinkie Pie declares,
"Time to turn your faces, into spaces!" (1 vs. 2) It is hard to pull triggers with your hooves. While she is figuring the mechanics out, one of the Shocktroopers fires his flamethrower at her. (3 vs. 3) The fire is ice cream. The fu-
"Alphus Inferno!" Twilight Sparkle launchs a storm of firey magic at
Gen Macinthebox! (3 vs. 6) It dissapates before it hits him. Hunched over, because he's injured, the general tries shooting Twilight with his pistol. (4 vs. 3) He shoots her in the Right Front Hoof!
Infantry #2 attacks
Twilight Sparkle. (3 vs. 3) They fire their M16's at the unicorn, but they miss because M16's are terrible.
Scout Squad flanks
Sun Tzu, and shoot at his back! (3 vs. 6) Before they even fire, Tzu spins around, 3 arrows knocked into his bow.
"When you fuck with my crew, you get fucked with the Tzu!" (6 vs. 3) The arrows go out in three directions, perfectly embedding themselves in each scouts head. They drop and the Chinese general yawns.
"Too easy."The Shocktroopers discharge their shotties' at
Pinkie Pie. (1 vs. 6) As they cock their weapons, they realize Pinkie has stolen one of their flamethrowers.
"Oooh, what does this button do?" (4 vs. 5) That button makes ice cream.
The Snipers survey the battlefield through their scope. They aim their rifles at
JFK in a Tank. One of them says, "You know, I feel kind of wrong for doing this..." (2 vs. 4) They miss all three shots. JFK aims the cannon of his tank at them.
"Liberty!" (1 vs. 6) The projectile blasted from the tank misses everyone, and just hits Derm's corpse.
Rambo takes out his knife and growls at
Teddy Roosevelt. "AAAAAAHHHHH!" He greets him in formal testoserone speak. Teddy politely replies in the same language,
"AMERICA! AAHHHHHH!" The two charge each other,
Sun Tzu muttering something about
"Crazy white boi shit." (4 vs. 6) As the two hack, slash, and yell at each other, Teddy goes for a downward stab, but Rambo is able to juke to the left! (3 vs. 6) He attempts to slash Teddy's neck, but the president grips his blade arm with his palm, quoting,
"YAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!" -Quoted supplied by GandhiMongolian Warriors charge the 2nd Infantry. (4 vs. 1) They grab three of the soldiers, and skewer their heads onto the ends of their turkish blades.
JFK in a Tank fires another round at the Snipers. (6 vs. 3) This time he actually lands a hit! Two of the snipers are instantly turned into the result of a bloody explosion!
General MacArthouse looks with despair as his prized atomic bomb is detonated in space.
"Damn you all! Do you realize how long it will take to get another!? I'll kill all of you, starting with this gook right here!" He points his high-powered pistol at
Cyan Garamonde. (2 vs. 3) Garamonde charges, Katana aloft again, and he manages to dodge every bullet MacArthur fires at him. (2 vs. 4) He slashes, but the general steps back just barely avoiding being sliced in half.
Genearl MacArthur
Health: Ribcage Sliced, Right Leg Shot
Mood: MY BOMBBBBBBBBBBB-
Twilight Sparkle
Items:
Health: Shot Right Front Hoof
Pinkie Pie
Items: Party Cannon (Broken), Shotgun
Health: Crispy Tail, Shot Flank
Teddy Roosevelt
Items: Rifle, Pistol, Knife
Health: Fine
Sun Tzu
Items: Kaiyun, Ji, Battle Banner, Art of War, Lamellar Armor
Health: Bludgeoned Heavily
Fluttershy
Items:
Health: Fine
Cyan Garamonde
Items: Katana, Tanto Knife, Samurai Armor
Health: Fine
Infantry #2 - The Reinforcements.
Equipment: Infantry Armor, M16's
Health: 4/10 Remaining
Shocktroopers - Heavily armored, slow moving power machines.
Equipment: Heavy U.S. Armor, Shotguns, Flamethrowers
Health: 7/8 Remaining
Snipers - They remain far back, spread out, picking off enemies one head at a time.
Equipment: Sniper Rifles, Camoflouge
Health: 2/4 Remaining
Rambo - This dude needs a shirt.
Equipment: Mobile Machine Gun, Knife, 999% Testoserone Level
Health: RAAAWWWRRR!
Mongolian Warriors
Equipment: Turkish Sabers, Mongolian Armor
Health: 50/50 Warriors
JFK in a Tank
Equipment: Sherman Tank
Health:
America