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Author Topic: Most annoying deaths  (Read 3815 times)

Aleksander

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Most annoying deaths
« on: January 30, 2012, 07:59:32 pm »

For all the times that your legendary swordsdwarf was stabbed in the head by a peasant, crushing the skull and tearing the brain.

Recently, I had a pretty good adventurer going and a crossbowman got a lucky shot off, hitting me in the knee, causing me no severe damage but apparently incredible amounts of pain. I was stunned and killed by his hammerman friend.

I just realized
I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an bolt to the knee

Oh god
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Dragons will add an additional dwarf to their size for every two years after that


I know what you meant, but I parsed this as "Dragons will eat a dwarf every two years". Which really, would be about the most dwarven pet you could get.

ff2

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2012, 08:06:44 pm »

Aww i was gonna make that joke :'(

and in other news my adventurer was killed by bogeymen 20 times.
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Spish

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2012, 08:23:59 pm »

Broken/chipped/fractured bones. Every time I die. Every. Single. Time. It's because a cracked rib or a chipped finger was enough to turn my legendary adventurer into a useless pansy. At least with missing limbs or paralyzed extremities I can keep fighting (and winning)
« Last Edit: January 30, 2012, 10:27:47 pm by Spish »
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Ah, yes, I thought something was amiss. Now I see. There's not enough terrible things in the lakes.

Vlad

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2012, 08:26:38 pm »

Broken/chipped/fractured bones. Every time I die. Every. Single. Time. It's because a fractured rib or a chipped finger was enough to turn my legendary adventurer into a useless pansy.
This. And getting one shotted in the brain or the heart by a lucky archer/crossbowman. This has happened to me so many times. I just fast travel to a bandit camp and I walk towards and I just get hit by an arrow and die.
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Megaman_zx

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2012, 09:08:09 pm »

i hate the lucky archers who hit you in the throat or lungs, all you can do is run around/ kill everything that moves till you bleed out.
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Tales of the Third Age, 34.11 rp stories from Genesis Reborn

“Name none of the fallen, for they stood in our place. And stand there still in each moment of our lives. Let my death hold no glory, and let me die forgotten and unknown. Let it not be said that I was one among the dead to accuse the living.”

-Deadhouse Gates (Book 2 in the Malazan Book of the Fallen) by Steven Erikson

Crioca

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #5 on: January 31, 2012, 12:44:21 am »

  • Climbing into a river and then randomly not being able to climb back out again before it freezes, despite having adequate swimming.
  • Autododging off cliffs / ledges
  • When you pick up a large group of people to kill some epic beastie and you're ambushed by 30+ goblins.
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sunfire1226

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #6 on: January 31, 2012, 05:33:52 pm »

Legendary adventurer mauled by lions. Killed a dragon for gods sakes! One lucky swipe to the head and it's all over...
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #7 on: January 31, 2012, 05:46:13 pm »

Attacking a rock, wielding a 2h steel sword with one hand like a bawss.

Hew its legs from beneath it, and proceed to stab it in the head (after about 9 pages of dodging, parrying and cutting). Sword gets logged in the skull, it doesn't die, and rips my leg off, before bleeding out. Then I bleed to death.

IamanElfCollaborator

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #8 on: January 31, 2012, 05:48:09 pm »

Gravitysplosion from dodging.

Clockwise Onions

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #9 on: January 31, 2012, 11:48:15 pm »

Bogeymen. Every single time. Even when using them for quick training they seem to always get lucky shots and chip the bone in my thumb then cave in my skull. Also getting a bunch of guys to kill a monster, getting jumped by bandits, surviving but losing all my men, and promptly getting head-smashed by the monster while attempting to solo it out of frustration.
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Nil Athelion

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #10 on: February 01, 2012, 02:58:15 am »

Both my latest heroic adventurers died to arrows and bolts.  One took an arrow to the head, despite his iron helm and two iron caps.  Died instantly.  The other took a bolt to the torso, despite the iron breastplate and two iron mail shirts.  Chipped a bone, stopped bleeding before fainting and having her skull hammered in.

In the latter case, a character I RPed as a really pissed off cousin took up adventuring for revenge.  Found the hammerwoman, beat her up, gouged out her eyes, strangled her unconscious, then grappled her hammer for her.  Poetic justice of hammering her helpless head in.  Also slaughtered all three archers in that camp.  Going by night did not help as much as he expected, but Zotho was right about having a bunch of fleshy targets comrades to draw off the arrow and bolt fire.

But jeez.  I'm starting to feel like a eternally reincarnated Boromir.

It's mostly the chipped bone stuff.  Even that time the bogeymen got me it was chipped bone.  I'm half convinced that my characters would feel better if they had the limb with the chipped bone simply cut clean off.
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Azated

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #11 on: February 01, 2012, 03:28:10 am »

I was playing a human swordsman a few days ago when I slept at night and got ambushed by night creatures. No problem, I had plenty of armor. I killed a good dozen or so with no wounds whatsoever until, somehow, one knocked me unconscious and then a group of five, two missing the majority of their limbs, proceeded to beat my helmet into my skull with three pages of red text appearing instantly out of nowhere.

I couldn't help but laugh.
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Then it happened. Then I cringed. Then I picked it up and beat him to death with it, and then his buddies, too.
You beat a man to death with his dick?

"I don't feel like myself. Maybe I should have Doc take a look at me" ~ Dreamy
 "You're gonna trust a dwarf that got his medical degree from a pickaxe?" ~ Bossy

NRDL

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #12 on: February 01, 2012, 03:31:47 am »

Made a guy.  Just a hero, not demigod.  Later nicknamed him "War" to well...yeah, I just wanted to make him an avatar of Armok, and more importantly, a Bogeyman slayer.  I slaughtered numerous peasant houses to train up his stats ( like strength, agility, willpower, spatial sense ) to high, got him legendary in wrestling, swordsmanship, etc.  His foot got pricked, but I got him a crutch, so his speed was still halfway decent.  I had only been able to get him to fight off ONE bogeyman attack, but I was immensely proud of that victory.  Using a crutch, without a shield, he still managed to do it. 

One day, my guy found a fortress belonging to a civ which I hadn't pissed off.  I decided to do a mission, just for the novelty of actually being able to do missions for people.  Along the way, my guy slept in the wilderness, alone.

Bogeymen blitzkrieged him while he slept. 
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GOD DAMN IT NRDL.
NRDL will roll a die and decide how sadistic and insane he's feeling well you do.

Splint

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #13 on: February 01, 2012, 05:55:53 pm »

Lost an arm, a leg, almsot bled out and escaped. Killed my intended target and his allies, only to be mauled by a giant ball of fur and hate that paints walls with dwarven baby blood.

Yes. Giant badger. I missed the first shot and it it BIT MY HEAD CLEAN OFF.

Hybrid

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Re: Most annoying deaths
« Reply #14 on: February 02, 2012, 01:48:21 am »

Some time ago my new adventurer, along with 2 companions, was wandering around. Soon I found a cave of some sorts and went into it to inspect. Several Z-levels down and nothing except for rock and yet another ramp downwards. Suddenly one of my companions was attacked. I rushed to him, but he was soon dead, thanks to a yak. I assaulted it but was killed quickly (didn't know about aiming attacks then).

A yak? In a cave? Really deep down in it?!

Also, drowning with the aid of a sea lamprey.
« Last Edit: February 02, 2012, 02:02:50 am by Hybrid »
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