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It's cool to read.

28 (56%)

It's kind of obtuse.

4 (8%)

Pretensious

4 (8%)

Stop ripping it off, Kitten, you hack.

12 (24%)

No

2 (4%)

Total Members Voted: 48

[Argonnek]

See if Sacha will tell us where any nearby secret labs are. We need to have some smart zombies to send against the other cities we may come across. Also, when the opportunity presents itself, we should go and get a map of the area to better plan our assault.

[stabbymcstabstab]

ok I think I know what creates what type of zombies.
Childern/AnkleBiters minor chance of actors
Drunk people/Brutes ( Snowflake was orginaly a Drunk Vet right?)
Crack/Speedsters?
Elfs/Soul eating monsters from freaking hell that are faster then a F*cking cheetah.

[Aseaheru]

can we call the crack people "Gigglemen"?

[stabbymcstabstab]

can we call the crack people "Gigglemen"?

+1 Lets call our first one Giggles.

[Rolan7]

Are we seriously considering making more gigglemen?  I guess having a backup would be nice, but damn...
Just seems like we should have a REALLY good reason before making another horror like that.

(This story certainly succeeds at being horrifying, good job Kitten Snot)

[Kitten Snot]

You decide you need to abuse the "deviously clever, fast motherfucker creation process". You make a mental note to rifle through the pockets of.... Oh, let's say Giggles, for some drugs.
You walk back over to Sasha, who is busy crying silently. You grab her by her rather long and pink hair and pull her out of the van.
Alright, now that you decided to tell us what we need, how about you tell us where we can find more warehouses or labs of yours?
Fuck you. She says. You smash her against the car door.
Sorry, run that by me again? You say with not a small amount of amusement.

I'm not telling you anything. You can kill me. All it will do is remove the only source of info you have. The corporation I built will kill you. If i tell you more the human race would suffer.
I wanted to HELP it god-damn it. She starts crying harder. Instead i created nothing but monsters...
Wow, what a whiner. It's crystal clear she had no control over her damned corporation if she is this much of a damned bleeding heart.
You give her a good hard slap. Yah, nice angst-bucket you have. TELL ME, or I'll make you.
What could you do! Death would be preferable to giving you more info!
You grab her leg, tripping her.  You've seen what i did to the elf. Do i need to make it unnecessary to bind you?

She instantly screams that she'll tell you. She yells that she hides them in hospitals and shelters.
GO AHEAD, MOUNT YOUR MISSION. DO HUMANITY A FAVOR AND GET SHOT!
Not the kind of wit that you used to use, princess. You're doing a fine job of entertaining me though. I suppose your right about this being the most entertaining kidnapping you ever took part in. She just starts screaming now. You put her behind the couch again after tying her up.
It seems she's going absolutely crazy. You seem to have a knack for driving young woman insane. Or she's just at that time of the month in which mood swings occur.

Talking about crazy young women, you suddenly see Diane and Giggles rush from around the corner. They seem to be in a hurry.
BOSS! WE HAVE COMPANY!
You hear Sasha Laughing from the van. It does not sound like a "mentally sound" laugh.
Taking a look at Giggles you see that he's bleeding and that his beer bottle has some brain on it.
Fight or Flight?


Stats:
Health:Unhurt.
Energy:Rested.
Infectivity 30%
Hunger: Fed.
Durability level 2
Inventory:8 Biobombs. 28 worms. one 357. magnum, 48 357. bullets,
Gun experience: Can hit stuff.
Safe-house security:None.

Horde:40? normals,16 anklebiters,10 actors,Snowflake,one adorable skellie. One Banshee. one Giggleman
Good friends: Diane
Allies: Bennie
Broken hostages:Sasha Kriloff.

I managed to create something actually horrifying? I thought that if i tried to make something scary i'd just end up with a metric butt-ton of Narm

EDIT: I just found a good clip. I now think of this character sounding like the joker in Batman:Under the red hood.
Here's a sample

[pikorge]

We should run i mean we can lose more than we can win. but we need an distraction. + make sure diane s save one bullet in the wrong place aaand wel lets just say there are much wrong places.

[Graknorke]

Wwhelp. Looks like all of that noise messed stuff up. The fact that brains are outside of his head implies that there's some fast projectiles going on. Probably bullets. Bullets are pretty deadly in most circumstances.
I guess we should get an idea of how big the force is, maybe send Bennie to spook them (if ghosts aren't too normal an occurance, and also if Bennie is actually intangible) while getting a look at them, sneaking out our entire force of zombies might be difficult, so our best chance at getting any out would be sending some zombies to fight while the majority runs.
But if it's large scale authorities then running wouldn't help too much.

Basically we don't know what exactly to do until we know what's going on.

[Argonnek]

I think that Giggles smashed in someone's head with the bottle, resulting in brain matter being stuck to it while his own brains (whatever the crack hasn't addled) remain safely in his skull.

But anyway, I recommend leaving about 10 normals, 5 of the most damaged, disturbing-looking anklebiters and the skeleton to cover our backs (be sure to supply them with worm grenades) while the rest of us GTFO ASAP.

[stabbymcstabstab]

I think that Giggles smashed in someone's head with the bottle, resulting in brain matter being stuck to it while his own brains (whatever the crack hasn't addled) remain safely in his skull.

But anyway, I recommend leaving about 10 normals, 5 of the most damaged, disturbing-looking anklebiters and the skeleton to cover our backs (be sure to supply them with worm grenades) while the rest of us GTFO ASAP.

+1 also shit the Scary soul eating MotherF*cker next to Sasha with orders to do its thing if we get overran.

[Dracken]

I think that Giggles smashed in someone's head with the bottle, resulting in brain matter being stuck to it while his own brains (whatever the crack hasn't addled) remain safely in his skull.

But anyway, I recommend leaving about 10 normals, 5 of the most damaged, disturbing-looking anklebiters and the skeleton to cover our backs (be sure to supply them with worm grenades) while the rest of us GTFO ASAP.

+1 also shit the Scary soul eating MotherF*cker next to Sasha with orders to do its thing if we get overran.

No,ive an even better idea,send him out first. Ain't nothing like seeing some poor idiots soul sucked out to make you run.

[Kitten Snot]

You decide that your flight/fight response is firmly in the "flight" camp.
You pick out some ugly motherfuckers out of the normals and put 5 of the most damaged ankle-biters with them.
You then order the kjoot wittle skellie to help 'em out. You give the smartest-looking of the bunch three worm-grenades and quickly tell them to throw it at the humans.
As a thundering sound of boots suddenly becomes audible you put your rear in gear and rush to the van ordering every zombie who isn't part of team meatshield to get in the van. You also give a loud yell that Bennie needs to get into the van.

It takes a while before they get inside you see some armored people appear around the corner and they open fire on team meatshield.
The Elf-thing suddenly screams. All of the armored men seem a bit out of it. One of them even throws up. At least, his visor is suddenly red with some pasta here and there.
You'd laugh if you weren't so busy laughing. Diane is currently cowering in the van. You figure that everyone is probably inside. Team meatshield is getting rather thin, but the zombie you gave the grenades too finally realized that he should throw them.

The Bio-bomb hits them square in the middle. The sudden screaming, convulsing, bloating, armor-ripping tumor-growing abominations confirm that it can burn through their armor.
You then decide to step on it and drive out of there. You accidentally drive over one of the zombies of team meatshield. You power right through the Zit-things, bursting them and covering more of the men (how many assholes do these guys have?). As you drive away, you hear the shooting stops a short while after you manage to get clear.

Well, there goes team meatshield. You try to think of where to go next when you suddenly beset by an armored vehicle! Itrams against your van, almost hitting you off the road. The banshee screams in protest.
Diane gags and hold her head.Banshee screams aren't fun to hear when you aren't retarded or braindead.
You are on a very long wide road with multiple side-passages.We need a plan!

Stats:
Health:Unhurt.
Energy:Rested.
Infectivity 30%
Hunger: Fed.
Durability level 2
Inventory:5 Biobombs. 28 worms. one 357. magnum, 48 357. bullets,
Gun experience: Can hit stuff.
Safe-house security:None.

Horde:30? normals,10 anklebiters,10 actors,Snowflake, One Banshee, one Giggleman
Good friends: Diane
Allies: Bennie
Broken hostages:Sasha Kriloff.

[Dracken]

What position is the van in I.e.is it on its side?

[stabbymcstabstab]

Have some one throw a B-Bomb at the truck it should melt through the windshield or a tire.

[Kitten Snot]

The armored vehicle is currently a bit behind you.