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[Wayward Device]

I've always wanted to use the fictional alien insult "Your mother breeds out of season" on someone. One day, one day.

[Nilik]

Somebody once claimed that Russian is a great language for really really vulgar swears. The example given was that the equivalent of "Oh shit" translates roughly to "Oh rotting whore on my dick" 

I have no idea if this is true or not, can anyone verify?

[ein]

Yeah, russian has some pretty fun swears~
It's sorta a whole language in and of itself, that, from what I've heard, is kinda used throughout eastern europe, and incorporates stuff from a bunch of those languages~

[DJ]

A popular story is how one day Party officials were coming to visit a nuclear powerplant, and the managers forbid the workers from using any swearwords that day. The workers were unable to communicate to each other what needs to be done (because they used swearword descriptions for everything rather than actual scientific names) and the plant nearly had a meltdown.

[RedKing]

I have a friend who, when agitated above a certain level (which was pretty frequent), would randomly generate his own new expressions, some of which were awesome. The most beloved is "flying fucking mother of a shitter". 


I occasionally curse in Russian (собака, иди к черту) or German (especially Scheiss!) but some of my favorites are in Mandarin, like:

cao ni zuzong -- literally, "fuck your ancestors"
ta made -- literally, "his mother's". Yeah, it doesn't quite make sense but it's quick and easy to say, and it will get a reaction.
hun dan -- literally, "mixed/dirty egg". This one takes some explaining. The gist is that your mother had sex with so many men that her egg was fertilized by multiple sperm, so insinuating that the target has multiple fathers. It's kind like of "bastard", but taken to a whole 'nother level. There are actually a lot of egg-related insults in Mandarin.
shen me niao -- literally, "what fuck". I like it because the tonality actually matches the way you'd say WTF in English.

[Loud Whispers]

I've always wanted to use the fictional alien insult "Your mother breeds out of season" on someone. One day, one day.

Mind if I borrow this one?
 
Currently my favourite thing is to shout kinda quickly;

YOUR MOTHER STACKS SHELVES IN MORRISONS.

[jester]

Im a big fan of swearing as a sort of poor mans poetry that can be used on almost any occasion to add more art to the world.  Single word swearing for anything other than pain is a display of a limited vocabulary.  Fuck is one of the greatest 'im in pain and need to say something' words though, rolls nicely off the tongue and is still offensive to enough people.

oh and:

Happier than a fly in an arsehair hat.

As dumb as the doorknob that his mother fucked to spawn him

Id like to make sweet, monkey love to your bloated corpse  (translation:  I dont like you)

So ugly if you saw him/her naked, you would have to fuck your grandmother to wipe the image from you mind.

So tight he sneaks down the beach at night and sucks the farts out of dead seagulls

Them:  I fucked your mother.  Me:  thats not how she tells it, she says you squeal like a pig when the tip of the strapon goes in, says she even your father could take more than you and he is less of a man than your grandmother.  Says the only one she has ever heard like you was your grandad and it got to the stage with all the squealing, crying and begging that we ended up having to just chain him to a bench so the dog could fuck him to quieten him down.  Ugly fucking sight seeing a grown man bawling and soiling himself while the jack russel sits there grinning as it has its way with him.  So its not your fault mate, if you are descended from a line that has come to find that felching small dogs gives them a function in the proper order of things, well, you are fucked from day one arent you?

[Flying Dice]

For me, the best insults are completely bizarre ones that you steal make up yourself, because where a 'fuck you' might mildly annoy them, a 'your father was a goat and your mother smelled of elderberries' 'yeah, smash your inclined plane, you rose gargler' will leave them mystified all day as they pick away at it, trying to figure out what you meant, which is ultimately much more satisfying.

[Wayward Device]

Having listened to the new Immortal Technique album, The Matyr, I have an uncontrollable urge to call someone a "presumptuous halfhearted homunculus".   

[klingon13524]

I've recently began using sod instead of f***, probably because of TotalBiscut. IE: Those sodding sods should mind their own sodding business.

Bonus trivia: the only person I swear around is myself.

[Shook]

Swearing? Yes indeed. Mostly for comedy or emphasis, though. There's "big", "very big" and "really fucking big". In terms of scale, however, curses fall short of obscenely long and obscure metaphors. "So big that the great sumo king of Neptune just shat his pants trying to comprehend the sheer size of that pomelo", though that also includes a mild curse. As for insults though, i'm getting rather rusty, though the one i use the most right now is the less-than-serious "fuck you and your favourite colour". It's such a fun one to say. :U

@jester: Somehow i managed to read all of that in Demoman's voice. So congratulations, i guess, because you managed to make the otherwise accentless voice in my head sound scottish.