Broker: Ah, what's for supper today?
Chef: Plump helmet spawn, sir.
Broker: Have you got anything without spawn it in?
Chef: Well, you could have the plump helmet spawn roast.
Broker: Oh? That sounds like it has spawn in it.
Chef: Minced spawn, sir. The ingredients are minced plump helmet spawn,, well-minced plump helmet spawn, well-minced plump helmet spawn, and minced helmet spawn.
Axewarves: o/' Spawn spawn spawn spawn... o/'
Broker: Don't you have anything else?
Chef: Well, since you asked, there is some well-prepared plump helmet spawn roast. The ingredients are minced plump helmet spawn, minced plump helmet spawn, finely minced plump helmet spawn, and well-winced plump helmet spawn. You see, it's the finely minced plump helmet spawn that gives it the --
Axedwarves: Spawn! Lovely spawn!
Broker [shouting over the axedwarves]: I meant something else with no spawn in it!
Chef: Well, there is some leftover cow cheese roast. That doesn't have much spawn.
Axedwarves: Lovely spawn!
Chef: It's ingredients are minced plump helmet spawn,
Axedwarves: Wonderful spawn!
Chef: ...minced cow cheese, minced cow cheese and minced cow cheese.
Broker: Oh, I do like cow cheese. I suppose a little spawn might be okay.
Axedwarves: Spawn spawn spawn spawn spaaaaaaaaawn!
---
The dialog here is my fabrication (with apologies to Monty Python), but the item descriptions come directly from the kitchens of Ducimmõrul. Aren't prepared foods supposed to have different kinds of ingredients in them? I guess it's true that you can never have too much cheese, and maybe plump helmet spawn is the dwarven equivalent of soybeans. You can use 'em for anything!
Author
Topic: plump helmet spawn, the universal ingredient (Read 708 times)