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[tryrar]

It's the close of year seven in Wheelbaldness. I've got the metal industry humming along producing candy, my food stockpiles are way overstuffed, I'm finishing up the dodge-me bridge into my fort(after having had to rip out most of the traps from discovering that the elf diplomat renders elf ambushers trapvoid to traps built before his visit    ), and my military is full of utter badasses(Seriously, I have 5 legendary marksdorfs!). Now the question becomes, what should I do now? It seems the gobs don't want to travel the distance to my fort( they ARE listed on the civ menu, but I've only had one siege and exactly one ambush in the 7 years of the fort, and that was only one squad both times!). I've pissed off the elves into attacking me(of course!), but they've only sent one ambush,though this is the first year of their assault; maybe next year would be more hopeful for action!

But meanwhile, what should I do to relieve the boredom of waiting for the elves to show up? Clear the caverns? Start designing my welcome for the clowns? I ask you dear forumers for ideas on the question of what next!

[IamanElfCollaborator]

'Accidentally' kill the most popular dwarf in the fort. !!FUN!! will happen.

[PokemonRocks85]

abandon the fortress and adventure mode into it

[tryrar]

'Accidentally' kill the most popular dwarf in the fort. !!FUN!! will happen.

Heh, not hard, I'd just burrow him under the atom smasher/Bridge-A-Pault at the end of my dodge-me bridge. However, I've NO experience with dealing with tantrum spirals(Never had a fort far enough along, and have something bad happen to it), and I'm not looking to learn how with this fort(maybe next fort!).

abandon the fortress and adventure mode into it

Ummmm, no, I'm looking to continue this fort, but if and when I DO abandon(or get destroyed), that might be a possibility.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

D: BUT WHAIIII!

Y U NO !!FUN!!

[PokemonRocks85]

Can't you use df fusion or something like that to make people attack you?

[UltraValican]

Use runesith to turn several of your war animals into zombies. And 1/10th of your dorfs/.

[peskyninja]

Or make kittens breath fire.

[FrankyPlaysGames]

Usually setting up a build project relieves me of some boredom. You can try and make a trap that RELEASES HOT MAGMA UPON ATTACKERS.F*cking elves.

[Loud Whispers]

Create an Arena, and danger room train an army of hostiles to legendary, to pit against your Dorfs.

[Garath]

make a fir tree using wood and any green stone you find, then decorate it with captured elf merchants (or get a war going, which may take some time). Finally, pump up magma to set the base of the tree on fire.

Or, you know, just build a giant statue to Armok and throw prisoners and animals off for fun

[Kylarus]

make a fir tree using wood and any green stone you find, then decorate it with captured elf merchants (or get a war going, which may take some time). Finally, pump up magma to set the base of the tree on fire.

Or, you know, just build a giant statue to Armok and throw prisoners and animals off for fun

This. Create a zoo for elves, rebuilding their native habitat out of wood. Then build a magma chute over top of it and hold them hostage.

[Garath]

And don't forget to make the statue anatomically correct: dwarfes reproduce by spores, not the more conventional genital method. He also needs to be fitted out in adamantine armor and weaponry before being considered complete