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[olemars]

I didn't think I had anything stupid enough worthy of this thread, but I just remembered I sent a large cargo ship off course once. My stepfather was the captain and I got to come along for a couple of weeks as my vacation when I was 12. Full bridge access.

Lessons learned: Don't pull random levers when nobody is looking. One of them might be the autopilot override.

[RedKing]

That's pretty awesome. When I was about the same age, my dad took me to his office while he had to finish up some last-minute paperwork. He put me in front of his computer with some program that showed his unit logo and let you change the colors on it. I got bored really fast and closed out to see what else was on the computer.

Did I mention that my father was a naval intelligence officer? 

When he came back, I was zooming in and out of a vector map of the world and using the cool buttons along the bottom edge of the monitor housing to pull up things like force dispositions (most likely Top Secret/SCI data), hardware specs, etc.

Needless to say, he lost his shit.
Looking back, I can understand why. If anybody else had seen me, he could have lost his security clearance and they'd probably have been interrogating me to find out who my Soviet handler was. 

[Deadmeat1471]

That's pretty awesome. When I was about the same age, my dad took me to his office while he had to finish up some last-minute paperwork. He put me in front of his computer with some program that showed his unit logo and let you change the colors on it. I got bored really fast and closed out to see what else was on the computer.

Did I mention that my father was a naval intelligence officer? 

When he came back, I was zooming in and out of a vector map of the world and using the cool buttons along the bottom edge of the monitor housing to pull up things like force dispositions (most likely Top Secret/SCI data), hardware specs, etc.

Needless to say, he lost his shit.
Looking back, I can understand why. If anybody else had seen me, he could have lost his security clearance and they'd probably have been interrogating me to find out who my Soviet handler was. 

So who was your soviet handler? 

[RedKing]

That's pretty awesome. When I was about the same age, my dad took me to his office while he had to finish up some last-minute paperwork. He put me in front of his computer with some program that showed his unit logo and let you change the colors on it. I got bored really fast and closed out to see what else was on the computer.

Did I mention that my father was a naval intelligence officer? 

When he came back, I was zooming in and out of a vector map of the world and using the cool buttons along the bottom edge of the monitor housing to pull up things like force dispositions (most likely Top Secret/SCI data), hardware specs, etc.

Needless to say, he lost his shit.
Looking back, I can understand why. If anybody else had seen me, he could have lost his security clearance and they'd probably have been interrogating me to find out who my Soviet handler was. 

So who was your soviet handler? 

I am tellink nothing, capitalist pigdog!

[Loud Whispers]

I dare you to try it and record your reactions in a vid, then post it on youtube.

Aw, but I'm camera shy :3

I am tellink nothing, capitalist pigdog!

What... How....

[MaximumZero]

I dare you to try it and record your reactions in a vid, then post it on youtube.

Aw, but I'm camera shy :3

DOOOOO EEEEEEEET!! The coffeeyaki calls for you...

[klingon13524]

I dare you to try it and record your reactions in a vid, then post it on youtube.

Aw, but I'm camera shy :3

DOOOOO EEEEEEEET!! The coffeeyaki calls for you...

klingon13524 has used peer pressure!

[Jackrabbit]

One time I paddled out in a kayak in front of a cruise liner because I thought I could make it across the sound to the other side. If I hadn't turned back, I rather doubt I would have.

Have you ever heard a cruise liner honking at you? It's looooooud.

[Loud Whispers]

One time I paddled out in a kayak in front of a cruise liner because I thought I could make it across the sound to the other side. If I hadn't turned back, I rather doubt I would have.

Have you ever heard a cruise liner honking at you? It's looooooud.

You should've shouted freedom and charged into the cruise liner. Just 'sayin.

I dare you to try it and record your reactions in a vid, then post it on youtube.

Aw, but I'm camera shy :3

DOOOOO EEEEEEEET!! The coffeeyaki calls for you...

klingon13524 has used peer pressure!

*Buggers off looking for soy sauce*

[RedKing]

also, when I was three, I stuck my little finger into a door hinge, and the door slammed shut.
I now have a permanantly bent nail.

My wife did that with a ring finger as a kid. She now has 9-1/2 fingers. (They wound up having to take off the upper joint and fingernail.)

To compensate for that, our daughter has 10-1/2 toes (one toe is bifurcated with two toenails). We call it her "lucky toe". 

[MaximumZero]

Does the daughter enjoy "Finding Nemo"?

[Darvi]

Better than 11 fingers, lest some Spaniard comes to kill her.

[RedKing]

Does the daughter enjoy "Finding Nemo"?

She does, actually...although I'd never made that connection. We figure it'll be a good icebreaker as she gets older.
"So, uh....I've got an extra toe, wanna see?"

Boys will be falling all over themselves for that.

Wait....hmm, I may not have thought this through properly. Luckily, her younger brother will be assigned to shadow her throughout school and facepunch any boys with nefarious intent. Which is to say, ALL of them.

[MaximumZero]

I could have my daughter teach your daughter how to facepunch.

[RedKing]

It's not that I'm worried that she can't defend herself, I'm worried that she'll WANT them to have nefarious intent.

"Hey, you wanna come up to my room to 'study'? *wink wink*"

Cue *BROPUNCH*.