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Author Topic: Stupid thread : Microwaves are cool  (Read 41010 times)

MagmaMcFry

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #135 on: January 13, 2012, 07:23:58 pm »

This thread is probably the second most convincing document of human stupidity in the Internet (after the Darwin Awards pages).

We need to improve.
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Phantom of The Library

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #136 on: January 13, 2012, 07:47:59 pm »

This thread is probably the second most convincing document of human stupidity in the Internet (after the Darwin Awards pages).

We need to improve.
Well keep in mind that most of these were during childhood, during which the mind has less experience and wisdom, or the teenage years, during which the brain actually regresses.
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Gnosis - Torn Ajar -- Text Suggestion Games.
This is what happens when we randomly murder people.

You get attacked by a Yandere triangle monster.

MaximumZero

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #137 on: January 13, 2012, 10:26:02 pm »

I thought he meant that we need to improve our one-upsmanship so that we can have the #1 example of human stupidity.
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Holy crap, why did I not start watching One Punch Man earlier? This is the best thing.
probably figured an autobiography wouldn't be interesting

Nadaka

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #138 on: January 14, 2012, 12:45:08 am »

I once made a sausage sandwich without a cutting board. They put my finger back on later that day.

I once did 45 miles an hour in a 35 zone with wet leaves in the streat on a bicycle. They put my ear back on later that day.
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Take me out to the black, tell them I ain't comin' back...
I don't care cause I'm still free, you can't take the sky from me...

I turned myself into a monster, to fight against the monsters of the world.

Bauglir

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #139 on: January 14, 2012, 01:10:27 am »

OH NO MOSQUITOES - NOTE TO SELF.

NEVER sleep next to a still pond ever again. Hate the things. Nothing worse than realising you've turned into a blood bank in the pitch black of the night, freezing cold and covered in buzzing mossies.
Yes, there is something worse. Then you realize you have malaria and seven different bloodborne illnesses. And then you get a footnote in medical textbooks!
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In the days when Sussman was a novice, Minsky once came to him as he sat hacking at the PDP-6.
“What are you doing?”, asked Minsky. “I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe” Sussman replied. “Why is the net wired randomly?”, asked Minsky. “I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play”, Sussman said.
Minsky then shut his eyes. “Why do you close your eyes?”, Sussman asked his teacher.
“So that the room will be empty.”
At that moment, Sussman was enlightened.

Loud Whispers

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #140 on: January 14, 2012, 03:41:33 am »

OH NO MOSQUITOES - NOTE TO SELF.

NEVER sleep next to a still pond ever again. Hate the things. Nothing worse than realising you've turned into a blood bank in the pitch black of the night, freezing cold and covered in buzzing mossies.
Yes, there is something worse. Then you realize you have malaria and seven different bloodborne illnesses. And then you get a footnote in medical textbooks!
How the hell are any of us seriously still alive?

And we haven't even found the crowning stupid yet D:

MonkeyHead

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #141 on: January 14, 2012, 04:01:57 am »

I have witnessed some absolute stupididty from my family. My brother once licked the power slupply for a kettle while it was still plugged in. Unsuprisingly it went bang. He has also done the following, amongst many others:

Put his genetalia in a petrol/oil/chemical can we found in a pile of refuse, leading to some painful burns.

Upon deciding the butter was to cold and hence solid to spread, put a kinfe in the microwave to "warm it up a bit" and forgotten about it. 15 mins or so later a small part of the kitchen was on fire.

Nigh on removed his thumb (which fortunately got sowed and healed well) by opening a soup tin with a spoon.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #142 on: January 14, 2012, 04:18:46 am »

Put his genetalia in a petrol/oil/chemical can we found in a pile of refuse, leading to some painful burns.

Upon deciding the butter was to cold and hence solid to spread, put a kinfe in the microwave to "warm it up a bit" and forgotten about it. 15 mins or so later a small part of the kitchen was on fire.

Nigh on removed his thumb (which fortunately got sowed and healed well) by opening a soup tin with a spoon.
1. Why?
2. WHY?
3. How? o-o

MonkeyHead

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #143 on: January 14, 2012, 05:11:53 am »

1: I can only assume he didnt want to get urine on peoples property, which didnt work out well.

2: If you knew nothing about microwaves, its excusable, almost.

3: Slamming the hanlde through the lid, then trying to lever the rest off using the hole as a pivot. His hand slipped.
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Bauglir

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #144 on: January 14, 2012, 11:30:12 am »

OH NO MOSQUITOES - NOTE TO SELF.

NEVER sleep next to a still pond ever again. Hate the things. Nothing worse than realising you've turned into a blood bank in the pitch black of the night, freezing cold and covered in buzzing mossies.
Yes, there is something worse. Then you realize you have malaria and seven different bloodborne illnesses. And then you get a footnote in medical textbooks!
How the hell are any of us seriously still alive?
Well I don't think that thing I just said has actually happened. Probably you wouldn't get a footnote for something so mundane. Mosquitoes are assholes.
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In the days when Sussman was a novice, Minsky once came to him as he sat hacking at the PDP-6.
“What are you doing?”, asked Minsky. “I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe” Sussman replied. “Why is the net wired randomly?”, asked Minsky. “I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play”, Sussman said.
Minsky then shut his eyes. “Why do you close your eyes?”, Sussman asked his teacher.
“So that the room will be empty.”
At that moment, Sussman was enlightened.

Loud Whispers

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Monkeys don't use ice cream.
« Reply #145 on: January 14, 2012, 02:17:10 pm »

Well I don't think that thing I just said has actually happened. Probably you wouldn't get a footnote for something so mundane. Mosquitoes are assholes.

This is a good time to mention then I've punched a window because a mosquito was really pissing me off... And I couldn't see it...

Angel Of Death

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Mosquitoes are jerks
« Reply #146 on: January 14, 2012, 02:47:37 pm »

I accidently electrocuted my crotch with a partially broken cable. I always make sure I dry my hands before itching myself ANYWHERE when holding something electric, now.
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99 percent of internet users add useless, pulled out of arse statistics to their sig. If you are the 1%, please, for the love of Armok, don't put any useless shit like this in your sig.
Hidden signature messages are fun!

Tellemurius

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Mosquitoes are jerks
« Reply #147 on: January 14, 2012, 02:54:42 pm »

I accidently electrocuted my crotch with a partially broken cable. I always make sure I dry my hands before itching myself ANYWHERE when holding something electric, now.
Alright, he wins, i give up.

Loud Whispers

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Mosquitoes are jerks
« Reply #148 on: January 14, 2012, 03:00:59 pm »

I accidently electrocuted my crotch with a partially broken cable. I always make sure I dry my hands before itching myself ANYWHERE when holding something electric, now.
Alright, he wins, i give up.
Glorious OP quote awaits this.

But seriously, this is amazing :P

Flying Dice

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Re: The really, REALLY stupid thread : Mosquitoes are jerks
« Reply #149 on: January 14, 2012, 05:35:56 pm »

I accidently electrocuted my crotch with a partially broken cable. I always make sure I dry my hands before itching myself ANYWHERE when holding something electric, now.
Alright, he wins, i give up.
Glorious OP quote awaits this.

But seriously, this is amazing :P

Yes, this needs to be the tagline for this thread.
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Aurora on small monitors:
1. Game Parameters -> Reduced Height Windows.
2. Lock taskbar to the right side of your desktop.
3. Run Resize Enable
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