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[Sirus]

If people really want Dwarven Armor, it can be Dwarven Armor. Or heck, let's change it to Darvi Armoire.

Let's go with Darvi Armoire. Dwarven Armor was just a joke

[EuchreJack]

I suggest Kat Armoire, since our hero wanted a cat instead.

[Pnx]

Your name is KAT ARMOIRE.
One day you were crawling down the street when some strange lady picks you up, says something about stray cats, and carries you off. You generally feel that sometimes it's better NOT TO QUESTION LIFE, especially since you are STILL JUST A TODDLER.
You are PURE EVIL AT HEART, and also A GENIUS.
You have a STRANGE SENSE OF PRECOGNITION. Which tells you you're going to be leaving this room soon and that this is going to be an interesting journey.

I swear to you, evil and genius is just what it assigned me.

EDIT: Now then, we get to pick a house, we can make our little shack, or we could build our own on a plot of land. Which will it be?

[Sirus]

Can we build stuff under the shack? The shack will be a cover for Kat's FUTURE DOOM FORTRESS

[Pnx]

Buying a shack it is then.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

You are now Jack, you somehow wound up in front of this house, something in your head tells you that you own this house. It looks like a nice place for you to settle down with your new Cat.
You're pretty sure this is a Cat, I mean, it said K-A-T on the label on the back of its shirt, which is of course spelled all wrong. But you figure maybe the previous owner of the stray had bad spelling, or maybe this is a Kat, some weird alternate form of Cat.

Yeah, that makes more sense, this must be a Kat then.


You go inside and take a look around, there's kitchen, nothing special there, and a bathroom with a bath. A bookshelf with some books that you may have to take a look at later, and a little living room, which hasn't got a TV or anything, there's just a chair and a sofa crowded around a phone...
Maybe the previous owners were really eager about their phone calls or something.


Then  we have the bedroom, your bedroom, you think having a bedroom is a pretty awesome thing to have.

Then we have th- wait a minute.

What do you need this for? There's a whole bed that you completely don't need. Maybe you could use it as some kind of Kat bed, you're not sure you want it sleeping with you. Isn't that like, unhygienic?


Hmmm, it seems a little big for it though. Maybe when it gets a little older? How big do Kat's get anyhow?

Well... what now?

[BunnyBob77]

Buy a computer, and use it to get a job (if you can still do that in The Sims 3, I've only played 2). Otherwise buy a television.

[Sirus]

(never played the sims before D: )

[Pnx]

Buy a computer, and use it to get a job (if you can still do that in The Sims 3, I've only played 2). Otherwise buy a television.

You don't actually need a computer in The Sims 3, you can just go to the workplace and ask for a job. In fact you can go all sorts of places without having to enter a loading screen. You can literally, just wander over to the next door neighbour, ask to come in, eat some canned soup out of their fridge, nap on the couch, then when you're asked to leave head back home.

[Girlinhat]

My vote is that Kat spends most of her time mooching off the neighbors as she's too terrified to return home to... that woman who claimed her.  She'd rather hide at the neighbor's than face "home".  Extra points if you can get a camping kit and actually live away from home somehow.

[Stone Wera]

Sell a wall, buy a television.

[Deon]

Hmm, I can build massive basements in my version, but that's will all EP and mods. Can you build basements in vanilla? If so, make a mad lab under the house!

[Pnx]

We can't actually build any basements, maybe if I had taken on more extras and mods and such, but I'm kind of too lazy to sort that out.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Sell a wall, buy a television.

Somehow you get the feeling this was a little unproductive.
It was pretty easy to use your phone to make the transactions on SimBay. Although you really have to ask, who the hell buys a chunk of wall?


You decide it's about time you got a job, you've always wanted to be a doctor... well actually, you've always wanted to be a vet, but people are technically animals right? So you'll just be a people vet.


You walk outside and summon a taxi then ride it over to the hospital, when you try to pay the cabbie he explains this is free. Wow, the public transportation here is really great. Makes you wonder why people would even own cars at all.

You ask the receptionist if you can be a people vet.

She says they don't actually do people vets, they do doctors.

You ask why that isn't the same thing.

She says it just isn't, and that perhaps you'd like a more entry level position.

You ask if you could like, assist a people vet then?

She says no, not without a med school degree.

You ask how you get one of those.

She says you go to the school, work your ass off for a few years, learn all these things about the human body, and get horribly into debt.

You say that sounds rather inconvenient.

She says it is a bit, but that's why she's a receptionist and not a doctor.

You ask if maybe you could just practice on people, you know, to get your hand in.

...

She says, hey, there's a position in the mental ward you might like, she really thinks maybe you should stop talking to her and go there.

You say no thanks, you don't like crazy people.

...

She says that actually, they've got a position that will get you working directly with doctors right away.



The receptionist assures you that organ donor is the entry level position.

You thank her, and take the job, it seems like a reasonable line of work.

The receptionist says that you should make sure they get all your organs, because you don't want any of those organs to go to waste.

You thank her for the advice, you're going to need to see as much people vetting as possible.

(I probably should have done this pesterchum style, but meh)


You go home and are back just in time to see some kid drop off a paper.

You go in through the hole in the wall and settle down to read the paper.

You have the urge to learn some logic, so you figure the best way to do that is to take a class. I mean, logic classes are like med school right?
Also the receptionist seemed to have implied you fail at logic, you're not sure what that's about.

So you try to find out if they're on discount today, turns out they're not, oh well, another day I guess.



You decide to read a book on it instead.

While you're reading some weird lady walks in through the wall and tries to welcome you to the neighbourhood. You do the natural thing and ignore her.
[picture missing, sorry]

She stands there staring at you for a couple of hours, then she goes outside to confer with her co-conspirators.

Then they leave.

Eventually you finish reading the first chapter of the logic book, and learn some interesting stuff. Did you know that if A=B, and B=C, then A=C.

So vets and doctors really are the same thing! This makes you feel rather happy.

You decide it's time to eat. You need to feed the Kat, so you try to figure out what it'll eat...


Your new-found logic was extremely useful in figuring this one out (you used your internet phone).

Turns out Kat's drink out of bottles, like some kind of gerbil. You guess they're more like gerbils? Maybe you can buy it a wheel or something to run around in later.


You have some soup, then watch some TV for a while.



You realize that losing the wall was actually a really bad idea.

See, you have this fear of dark things, and with the wall gone they can now get into the house. You're worried they might eat your Kat.


It's time to go to bed anyway. Busy day tomorrow donating organs.



You are now Kat.


You seem to have been left to fend for yourself.


You try going to the strange lady's room, and keep her awake by pestering her, but she doesn't seem to know what to do with you.


Eventually you crawl off to the other room and cry for a few hours, then you fall asleep on the floor.

[Girlinhat]

...this is glorious.

[Sirus]

Organ donor.

HA! 

[Ottofar]

...this is glorious.

This and watching, because I don't come here often.