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[Elf Lover]

If you've seen the Fluffy Wambler thread, you'll know why this sounds so extreme.

On my most recent embark, a perfect embark which is heavily forested, has high ore content, flux stone in abundance, a deep river filled with fish and a thin layer of sand, I thought I had found dwarve Utopia. So, I sent out my dwarves, two to dig the fortress, two to chop wood, one to fish and the last to sit about aimlessly and drink my supplies of ale.
So, a few minutes in after designating all that needed to be designated, I recieved a message:

Urist McWoodcutter cancels chop tree: Interrupted by alligator         x5

Mmkay, nothing out of the usual.

Urist McFisherDwarf cancels catch fish: Interrupted by alligator         x14

What? Again?

Urist McFisherDwarf has died.

WHAAAAAAAAAAT?

Scroll over to dead dwarf, and examine the corpse. Lots of blood spatters, missing limbs and a very dead dwarf. A few squares away, an alligator is crawling back into the water, looking rather shifty.

Urist McWoodcutter has died.

Sigh. Another alligator.

-Esc-
-Abandon Fortress-
-Yes-


F**cking alligators.

[Wannazzaki]

Wamblers in a crocodile skin suit.

[Oliolli]

Wamblers kill Bronze Colossi, alligators don't.

[Wannazzaki]

Wamblerskill Bronze Colossi, alligators don't.

Have we ever TRIED throwing a crocodile judochop style?

[Girlinhat]

You abandoned over one dead fisherdwarf?  Really?  I'm usually tossing to those guys to the gators when they're doing everything right!

I like to think of them standing on the bridge as someone pulls the lever, shouting out, "I did everything you wanted!" as they fall.

[Wannazzaki]

It is FAR more fun to ride your fort out to the bitter end. You never know one lone mysanthrope in the mines might be so oblivious migrants arrive and attempt to clear up the woopsies

[daggaz]

Back before I knew how to organize a resistance, I had found the perfect embark site.  A tall cinder cone, full to the very top with a large magma pipe, emerged from a flat jungle landscape, and a river cut thru the shoulder of the volcano as well and meandered thru the area, carving out a large, easily protected area for my livestock.   Ores aplenty, flux exposed in the river bed, I couldnt be happier. 

Two minutes after embark, I noticed everybody but my miners were dead, including my large menagerie of animals.  4 or 5 alligators had crawled out of the swamps and run them all down (fuck alligators are fast!).   Dismayed, I quit and deleted...  wish SO MUCH that I had saved the worldgen file.   ffffufuuuuuuuuu.   

[Nan]

You abandoned over one dead fisherdwarf?  Really?  I'm usually tossing to those guys to the gators when they're doing everything right!

I like to think of them standing on the bridge as someone pulls the lever, shouting out, "I did everything you wanted!" as they fall.

Urist McManager: "New guy? Fisher dwarf right? You can start by feeding the 'gators".

[Elf Lover]

...In my new embark, I've found it's virtually impossible to get your dwarves to take an arrow to the knee.

@I used to be an axelord like you, until I took a (+bronze bolt+) to the upper leg, chipping the bone through the *copper leggings*!@

[exolyx]

My dwarves seem to have much less trouble with alligators.  Delicious and nutritious.

[Loud Whispers]

Bring Crossbows. Aim at local river.

[Wannazzaki]

Bring Crossbows. Aim at local river.

Pussy. Just pump a wave of magma over the pools.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

I usually use Dfusion to bring hordes of elves to fish while my dwarves mine.


The rivers are running with the blood of legions.

[Loud Whispers]

Bring Crossbows. Aim at local river.

Pussy. Just pump a wave of magma over the pools.

Somehow I doubt you'd be able to set up pumps or find magma in the time it takes an Alligator to wreck your embark.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Not just magma...

Magma, the blood of elves, and a cave-in.