I admit, I procrastinated a bit too much with this one. I think I had my first bit of writer's block since this began. Kept getting stuck on little things, which lead to me repeatedly getting sidetracked, which lead to this update being four days later than planned...Oh well, what's important is that it's here now.
> You slay them all. Every. Single. One. Even Tholtig Cryptbrain is no match for Flesh Liberator combined with your badassery.
> Just when you're ready to pass out from exhaustion, you notice that Flesh Liberator seems to be... changing form. It begins glowing, and you can see it changing shape. It is still a spearsword, but it's lighter, and infinitely sharper. It seems to be affecting your mind as well; all you can think about is the spilling of blood.
"Oh god...What did I do. I..I had to...If I didn't, Armok would have. I tried to make it quick....I just...Goddamn it...", Are the words that rush through my head, as I stand covered in blood and surrounded by the now lifeless bodies of my comrades. Ready to collapse from exhaustion, I use my spearsword to keep myself balanced, while I listen to the blood god condescendingly comment on my performance...
"Wow! Well done, D.Z.A. Very well done! That had to have been one of the most entertaining fights I've seen in a while. Now, maybe if you had been more willing to spread bloodshed like that in the past, you wouldn't have be in this situation."I grind my teeth in anger, yet simply don't have the energy to lash out. And as Armok and his friend begin to chat back and forth about my future, I am distracted from my anguish when I notice something very strange happening to Flesh Liberator. Its engravings glow with unusual intensity, and I find myself falling to my knees when it suddenly pierces straight through the ground.
I sit there, amazed and perplexed by how easily Flesh Liberator is able to cut through the solid earth beneath me, it's like it isn't even there. And to make matters even stranger, nearly all of the weight of Flesh Liberator seems to have somehow disappeared, it feels almost as light as air now. In fact, if it were any lighter, I'd be worried about it floating away.
Filled with hate, tormented by guilt, and fueled by an overpowering desire for vengeance, I can't help but chuckle quietly as I think about the events to come, for it is a desire that I cannot wait to satisfy. It's time to turn this battleground into a warzone. "You want bloodshed....I'll give you bloodshed."
The Expendables cast: Appear, and help DZA while being manly.
Chuck Norris: Appear, and help the blue-eyed guy. Also, summon Godzilla and Mothra, as well as the whole of the Power Rangers to distract the Expendables cast.
World: Implode due to the awesomeness (or at least quake, and open up a fissure or two...)!
World: Implode due to the awesomeness (or at least quake, and open up a fissure or two...)!
> A section of the cavern has collapsed! x99
> Huge chunks of the world fall down into nothingness, adamantine spires suddenly pierce up through the ground in the distance. Yeah, this world is definitely bugged.
I stand up, grip Flesh Liberator with both hands, and with one mighty slash, create a rift in the fabric of reality. The subsequent badassery increase leaves me feeling reinvigorated and ready for anything, though that is hardly my reason for such an action.
"What the fuck did you do that for?", Armok asks. I simply smile, and seconds later, watch as a group of some of the most well known badasses in human history make their way through the rift.
"Ah, so that's how you wanna play? Alright then, let's have some Fun. CHUCK!"Just then, a somewhat elderly, bearded man roundhouse kicks his way through the fabric of reality to join us in the arena.
"Hey Armok, how's it going?", the bearded elder asks in a friendly tone.
"Pretty good. Glad you could make it. Listen, I need you to do me a favor and teach that kid over there a lesson in 'Knowing When to Give Up'."The bearded elder glances over at me. It takes him a few seconds to realize what Armok is talking about, but seems more than willing once he understands. "Sure thing.", he responds. He then walks back into the tear in reality he came through, and, after several moments of uncomfortable silence, reemerges. This time being followed by a band of warriors clad in an array of colorful outfits. I briefly wonder if they are related in some way to the strange robed figures that I encountered earlier, before watching as said tear in reality is made a great deal larger when two gargantuan beasts make their way through it as well. One seems to be a mutated moth-like creature, while the other is bipedal, and reptilian in appearance.
Music, to make an epic fight legendary."Feel like surrendering now? It'll make things a whole lot easier on yourself.", the bearded elder asks confidently.
Surprised but not discouraged, I point Flesh Liberator in his direction. "Nope. Guess you're not a very good teacher."
The bearded elder smirks at my retort, before speaking to his posse, "I'll take the kid on myself, you deal with his friends."
I twirl Flesh Liberator around a bit in order to boost my badassery just enough to regain my aura. "Let's rock."
As we charge toward each other, the level of pure, concentrated awesome contained in the area starts to prove too much for the world around us to handle. And as our forces collide, the breaking point is surpassed. Chunks of the arena floor start to break off around us, falling into an endless black void. Jet Li and Dolph Lundgren do battle with the colorfully outfitted band of warriors, while the others focus on taking out the gargantuan reptile. Except for Sylvester Stallone, who appears to have somehow made it onto the back of the moth-beast, and is now attempting bring it crashing down.
The undead hordes panic and scatter as more and more of the arena crumbles into the blackness, and far off, massive pillars of some light blue material can be seen rising up into the sky.
Sock puppet man doesn't seem to realize what is happening, he doesn't even put up a fight. With those innocent child-like eyes he turns towards you to wave. "Hidy ho there Dirty Man!" He gives a goofy grim as you slay him. Slay him for the sake of living through hell. How you feel about it is how you feel about it, but you know that sock puppet man trusted you. With every fiber of his being. Saved you. And now you killed him, just like that. He didn't even try to dodge. The last look on his face was that goofy smile he always has. Unaware of your intent. Just saying, you are kind of a dick for killing him.
As the epic duel between me and the bearded elder continues, I catch a glimpse of sock puppet man's corpse falling into the void, and am reminded of the horrible act of injustice brought upon him and the others...Armok was right about one thing, I need to start taking responsibility for my own screw ups. Regardless of how much I hated every moment of it, their blood is on my hands. A manly tear is shed for those lost, those I will never forget, those I swear to avenge. Unfortunately, my mourning distracts me from the duel to the death that I am still actively engaged in, and the bearded elder gets a hit in that almost sends me over the edge and into the void.
"You just had be a stubborn brat, didn't you?", He says to me, as he prepares to deliver a roundhouse kick sure to finish me off. "Maybe in hell, you'll learn when to call it quits.". The lightning fast kick connects with unmatched force, though the bearded elder's confident demeanor quickly fades upon seeing his leg now firmly in my grip. "And maybe when I meet you there, you'll actually stand a chance against me.", I reply. I then spin the bearded elder around, and throw him down into the void with all the force I can muster. I watch him rapidly descend into the unknown, before going to lend a hand to my unquestionably manly allies.
The Lich King: "Impressive. Real Death Knight materiel there. Of course he'll need training. Like learning not to destroy half my army."
Armok: Cackle as only the god of blood can cackle.
Medivh: glare at Armok as only a crow can. "Azeroth is outside your domain. Don't make me intervene. I only let you send DZA here because it gets him to Azeroth.
Armok's blue-eyed friend, who has been observing the fight in the backround the whole time, is undoubtedly impressed by my performance. He begins to toss around the idea of training me to serve as a Death Knight in his army, while Armok himself breaks out into another fit of crazed cackling, overjoyed by the conflict and chaos taking place within the arena. Or what's left of it, at least.
Much to his irritation, however, Armok's joy is interrupted by the crow(who, due to my deficiency of bird-related knowledge, I mistook as a raven) glaring at him in a very crow-like fashion. Or, trying to. It's difficult to glare specifically at someone when that someone happens to be omnipresent. The crow informs Armok that he does not reign over this realm, and threatens to step in should he not act accordingly.
"Ugh, don't you have a poet to harass or something? My influence extends to wherever blood flows and death prospers. Now I don't know about you, But I'm seeing quite a lot of both down there. Now leave me be and let me enjoy this moment.">say you lack your old companions and then use the demons as cannon fodder as you come up with a plan
>raptor: whatno, ESCAPE, GET MAD, FIND ARMOKS MANAGER AND FILE A COMPLAINT AGAINST HIM, AND WREAK SOME MOAR HAVOC ON NEARBY FOOD PILES, ARENAS, AND A WAY TO GET TO THE LILYPAD flesh liberator, TOADY NEEDS IT!.
Slowly but surely, the battle begins to tip in our favor. Yet even though the ensemble of badasses may help me win the current fight, that wretched blood god is almost certainly going to have many more tricks up his metaphorical sleeve. Not to mention, the one thing they can't help me with is the empty feeling I've had inside since the death of my old comrades. Luckily, I think I have an idea that could help remedy both of these problems.
I immediately take off toward one of the light blue pillars that recently popped up, jumping over areas of broken and collapsing ground when necessary. As I approach a particularly tall one, I leap into air, Flesh Liberator held tightly, and hope that I manage to time this right. At the last second, I swing the spearsword with full force, effectively
slicing the pillar in two!The upper half of the pillar lightly blows away with the breeze, and while I turn my focus to landing in a graceful and light-footed manner, a wave of demons begin to spill out into the realm.
Meanwhile, Armok is again unable to cherish the bloodshed after he notices the fan-headed raptor furiously running around and causing all sorts of mischief in his arena.
"Damn it, what the hell are you doing now?? That's it, D.Z.A.'s getting a new playmate..."The gold-cloaked man/Flesh Liberator ponders his new existence as a weapon.
He then decides to fly out of DZA's hand and kill everything opposing him in sight.
Most of the demons(the ones that didn't accidentally fall into the void) pay little attention to me, and instead decide to put their effort into hunting down the disorganized legions of undead running about. Their blue-eyed, heavily armored leader apparently does not appreciate this, and, seeing that I was the one responsible for releasing them, starts walking over, sword in hand, so that he can have a word with me, while also slaying any demon foolish enough to get in his way. It is at that moment that Flesh Liberator pulls itself from my grasp, and, after hovering in place for a few seconds, bolts toward the heavily armored figure with unprecedented speed. He tries to parry the spearsword, but the attempt goes less than ideally when the blade of his own sword is divided in two as a result.
The severed sword blade sails off in an arc!From the looks of it, he has now gone on the defensive, and is doing his best to dodge Flesh Liberator's numerous attacks and remain in one piece. He seems to be doing a good job so far, but I can't say how long that's gonna last...
"Hey D.Z.A., I have a special visitor here for y-...The fuck is going on with that spearsword of yours? Call it off before it harms the Lich King! I'm still looking forward to watching you become his undead servant.", I hear the thunderous voice of Armok command.
"Sorry, my spearsword calling skills are a bit rusty, I'm afraid. Just be thankful that you're omnipresent, blood god. Otherwise I would have done the same to you myself long ago.", I complacently tell Armok.
"Heh, be thankful you're so easy to manipulate, God-King. Otherwise I would have grown bored of you long before you had the chance..."Name: D.Z.A.
Sex: Male.
Age: 16
Badassery Level:
MAXIMUM.
Location: Near the Gurubashi Arena.
Inventory: Nothing.
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Topic: You are Me, Chapter IV: Into Lands Unknown (Read 130794 times)