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Author Topic: Project EVIL: Mission Time!  (Read 39182 times)

vagel7

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #180 on: January 30, 2012, 11:09:27 am »

Xavier heals himself some more.
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That last gobbo would stand there, missing an arm, punctured in a kidney, liver, and spleen, fading in and out of consciousness at the far end of where the drawbridge would go, and his last sight would be the drawbridge dropping down and smashing him like a bug.

God DAMN I love this game!

MonkeyHead

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #181 on: January 30, 2012, 12:23:51 pm »

Upgrade Operation: Beach Mischief to Operation: Beach Mayhem. Take greater risks when commiting thievery, and be mre prepared to use rapid violence. Rocks make good impromptu headbashers.

King DZA

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #182 on: January 30, 2012, 03:25:19 pm »

Eat the airline peanuts to boost innovation points, then take a nice little forest nap.

GlyphGryph

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #183 on: January 30, 2012, 03:48:09 pm »

cry quietly to myself in the darkness, eyes closed and rocking slowly back and forth. Eat innovation point to boost peanuts.
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Powder Miner

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #184 on: January 30, 2012, 06:43:17 pm »

Bite my nails, looking scared as h!@#.
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USEC_OFFICER

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #185 on: February 01, 2012, 08:08:16 pm »

As befitting your status as a Temporary Unpaid Intern, you arrive on the island in a packing crate. Not to imply that Project EVIL would have spent the money to ship you to the island. Oh no. Instead you used the packing crate as a boat, paddling furiously towards the island. As the crate touches down on the beach it collapses into a pile of wood pulp. Using your highly trained and expert eyes, you notice that you are standing near the base of a giant lighthouse.

Spoiler: John Evly (click to show/hide)


A midnight parachute drop might have daunted lesser men, but not you. After all, look at the size of your pecs. Could a coward have pecs like these? I think not. Of course a coward would have double-checked the straps on his parachute. Luckily, you manage to hold onto the parachute long enough to only bruise your ego. Your landing leaves you on the very edge of the city, with the industrial district to the east, the harbours to the south, and wilderness in the other directions.

Spoiler: Sargent Rick (click to show/hide)


Unlike the other agents who arrived at the island in a whole host of clever and interesting ways, you arrive on a boat. Nothing fancy or special either. Just a regular old ship. The only thing interesting that happened on the journey was when the cat got worms. Anyways to the north is the industrial district, and to the east is the industrial park.

Spoiler: Capt Joun Quire (click to show/hide)


Seventeen of the greatest minds in Project EVIL devoted their Sunday to figuring out how to quickly, stealthily and safely insert Jessica into the island. In the end they decided to use the time-travelling DeLorean. While the time-travelling DeLorean would not be completed until 21XX, the completed car was sent back in time to 20XX, thus saving everyone a lot of time and effort. Anyways the DeLorean appears in an alleyway in the commercial district. To the east are the public beaches, to the south is the industrial district, yadda yadda.



You exit the DeLorean. After all, Project EVIL isn't going to leave a questionably sane person in control of such a ground-breaking vehicle. Once Jessica leaves the car you send it back in time several days, where it would be picked up by a flustered agent in the impound car lot. Various microbes hitched a ride on the DeLorean as it travelled back in time, thus causing at least seventeen paradoxes as those microbes killed their ancestors. Luckily, the only casualties were a novelty teacup and an East Timorian man named Burt.

Spoiler: John Smith (click to show/hide)


Thanks to your enhanced prestige, you arrive in the city in a rather luxurious railroad car. Of course how you arrived in the railroad car is a completely different and far more entertaining story, since the island has no railroad connections leading off of it. After disembarking, you check your surroundings. To the north of the train-station are a whole stew of personal cottages. To the east is the airport, and to the south is the city proper. Additionally the train-station also doubles as a subway terminal.

Spoiler: Esquire Xavier Omon (click to show/hide)
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Powder Miner

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #186 on: February 01, 2012, 08:10:41 pm »

Usec, you know the entire point of John Evly is that he isn't actually evil- Oh god what did they do to him.
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USEC_OFFICER

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #187 on: February 01, 2012, 08:17:14 pm »

Usec, you know the entire point of John Evly is that he isn't actually evil- Oh god what did they do to him.

Nah, they just tried to teach him how to be evil. You can lead a horse to water and all that junk.
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mcclay

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #188 on: February 01, 2012, 08:27:01 pm »

Whisper a prayer to the outer gods and then look for the bastard who stole my shit.
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Am I back? Its a mystery to everyone

monk12

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #189 on: February 01, 2012, 09:48:08 pm »

Head down to the subway, and find somebody who appears to be both reasonably well dressed and gullible. Serve him lawyerly documents that prove his current ensemble is in direct violation of copyright, and that failure to Cease and Desist the wearing of them immediately will result in prosecution to the fullest extent of the law. Optional, trade him my current ragged clothes.

Powder Miner

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #190 on: February 01, 2012, 09:53:25 pm »

Walk up to the lighthouse.
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GlyphGryph

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #191 on: February 01, 2012, 10:52:25 pm »

READ ALL MINDS FOR REMAINDER OF DAY.
This is a mandatory ability, and can not be disabled. I assume it will be a constant drain on psi points after a certain amount or strength or /something/ - at that point, have me collapse from exhaustion, basically. Or just treat it as passive surface thoughts, I dunno!


Giggle, and greet the person who came with me in the DeLorean. "Hi, I'm Jessie! Can you think about what we're doing here?"
READ MINDS

Sit down on a trash can (with lid) and dangle legs.
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Evilsx

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #192 on: February 02, 2012, 01:12:56 am »

Well.....Better then being stuck in a crate......

Joun Quire shall go to the industrial park and look for anything interesting
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Geen

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #193 on: February 02, 2012, 06:53:20 pm »

See if I can find someone to steal the identity of in the cottages.
"Well, Jessie, we are people who hurt other people for fun and profit. Wanna help me kill a man? I promise, it will be fun!
« Last Edit: February 02, 2012, 07:00:29 pm by Geen »
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PyroDesu

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Re: Project EVIL: Finally!
« Reply #194 on: February 02, 2012, 07:42:28 pm »

((Midnight parachute insertion? Badass. Screw actually being strapped to the parachute!))

Head east, making sure to keep out of sight of people, security cameras, and other various detection memorabilia. Industrial districts are full of !!FUN!! stuff, especially for those that are trained in EVIL. Try to determine the contents of any warehouses I come across without alerting anyone/anything.

Usec, you know the entire point of John Evly is that he isn't actually evil- Oh god what did they do to him.

!!SCIENCE!!
« Last Edit: February 02, 2012, 10:21:19 pm by PyroDesu »
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Quote from: syvarris
Pyro is probably some experimental government R&D AI.
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