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Author Topic: American Election Megathread - It's Over  (Read 764075 times)

Karlito

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6420 on: October 11, 2012, 04:31:20 pm »

How do we determine a winner? Is it a fight to the death?
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Owlbread

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6421 on: October 11, 2012, 04:31:35 pm »

Could the combatants throw their own teeth if they get knocked out of the person's mouth during the fight?

I think... if the weapon was originally a part of their body then it is permissable. We just have to give them that.

Because I can see Obama driving a knee into Romney's back while choking him with a tie?

As enjoyable as that is, it would be forbidden.

How do we determine a winner? Is it a fight to the death?

It is a battle until either party is completely unable to fight any more. If death is the only way to make that happen, so be it.
« Last Edit: October 11, 2012, 04:33:39 pm by Owlbread »
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Nadaka

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6422 on: October 11, 2012, 04:32:31 pm »

Remember that Obama is a smoker and may not have the same endurance that Romney will have after years of clean decaf mormon living.
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Owlbread

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6423 on: October 11, 2012, 04:33:10 pm »

Remember that Obama is a smoker and may not have the same endurance that Romney will have after years of clean decaf mormon living.

Exactly. And Romney certainly doesn't look 65.
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mainiac

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6424 on: October 11, 2012, 04:35:47 pm »

If I was ever in a debate for a national office I would start with this speech:

"Hello to everyone in the audience.  I know I am supposed to start by talking about my vision but unfortunately I am forced to talk about something else instead.  Tonight my opponent is going to lie a lot.  I know this because he is a member of a political party that has a consistent record of egregiously lying in order to seek control of this country.  Bush lied and said his tax cut's wouldn't primarily benefit the rich and wouldn't create a deficit.  Romney lied and said he had a deficit neutral tax reform that wouldn't be regressive.  My opponent has joined a party who's agenda is based on lying.  I will not be able to catch all these lies, maybe not even most of them.  A lie often takes fewer words to say then to expose.  So I ask that you listen carefully tonight, maybe write some stuff down and check what both of us say against cold hard facts before you make a judgement.  I probably will make some mistakes tonight but I promise to apologize and own up to them tomorrow.  And if by some chance my opponent defies my expectations and proves that he is an honest man then I will applaud him tomorrow because it would be a wonderful step in the right direction for our democracy.  Sadly I do not expect that.  I expect this will be a debate between lies and truth and hope to convince you that I am indeed truthful.  Thank you very much for your time."


... and that's why I'd never be a good politician!
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Nadaka

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6425 on: October 11, 2012, 04:38:22 pm »

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Take me out to the black, tell them I ain't comin' back...
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6426 on: October 11, 2012, 04:41:45 pm »

Who The Hell Is Joe Biden is a living improbability engine. Anything could happen. He could win spectacularly. He could fail epically. Or he could just be boring and possibly senile. These are the many enigmas of The Biden!
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Descan

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6427 on: October 11, 2012, 04:42:52 pm »

Holy crap Romney is 65.

I thought he was 50! AT MOST!
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6428 on: October 11, 2012, 04:43:27 pm »

He must have a good makeup artist. It certainly isn't as if he can't afford it.
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Quote from: Thomas Paine
To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead, or endeavoring to convert an atheist by scripture.
Quote
No Gods, No Masters.

SalmonGod

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6429 on: October 11, 2012, 04:48:22 pm »

I wouldn't rule out plastic surgery, either?  The guy is not ignorant to the usefulness of superficiality.
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6430 on: October 11, 2012, 04:49:38 pm »

I don't know. Plastic surgery has gotten better, but I don't think its really something a politician would benefit from, especially if it ever went public.
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Quote from: Thomas Paine
To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead, or endeavoring to convert an atheist by scripture.
Quote
No Gods, No Masters.

Flying Dice

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6431 on: October 11, 2012, 04:51:08 pm »

A substantial sum of money applied directly to the forehead in large-denomination bills does wonder's for one's appearance, old chap.
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Kogan Loloklam

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6432 on: October 11, 2012, 06:08:41 pm »

None of you get it. The problem with American Politics isn't that Romney is a Liar. Obama is ASSINATING people. Just look at the Wikileaks Boeing/Airbus documents for more crazy Obama stuff.
I'm not trying to say Romney is better, with his "let's support Israel in nuking Iran stance, or his desire to sell Americans like commodities. No, they are both garbage.
The real problem with American politics isn't either of them. It's the political parties.

I'm not a democrat, even though I voted for one once.
I'm not a Republican, even though I favor more states rights and smaller government.
I'm an American. A citizen of the country occupying a large central portion of a contenent found in the Northwestern Hemisphere of the planet Earth. As such, the mandate to be ruled by a government at all is partially given by me, and the American Government lost that Mandate. The problem is there is nothing worth replacing it with, so a theoretical power vaccuum exists. And the insane are the only ones who are capable of creating enough of a plurity to get elected, because everyone is afraid to look weak through compremise, in part due to the theocratic domination of said country. And yes, it's Democrat AND republican theocratic domination. The religion doesn't matter. It never mattered.

My fellow Americans, we are the westernized Iran. That is what is wrong with our country. And nothing you can do can change that, unless we all work together to do something.

And so, my little puny arms push against the tidal forces of Apathy, and no movement is made. Others try the same thing. Never in unison. Someday Nemo will come and free us all. Until then, we are bound for the cannery.

Stubbs/Scamps 2012!!!
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GoombaGeek

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6433 on: October 11, 2012, 06:11:48 pm »

I know, everyone can move to Canada except for the politicians!

Bring nukes!

I swear it's not that cold!
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kaijyuu

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Re: American Election Megathread
« Reply #6434 on: October 11, 2012, 06:17:42 pm »

I'll probably be voting Green. My state is solid republican (lowest support of Obama in the nation, iirc), so if I'm going to throw away my vote no matter what box I check, I might as well throw it at the party I'm closest with.
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For, in order that men should resist injustice, something more is necessary than that they should think injustice unpleasant. They must think injustice absurd; above all, they must think it startling. They must retain the violence of a virgin astonishment. When the pessimist looks at any infamy, it is to him, after all, only a repetition of the infamy of existence. But the optimist sees injustice as something discordant and unexpected, and it stings him into action.
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