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[Bill the dwarf]

Let us have another game of Calvinball, or TACTICUS as I've seen here before, shall we?

[Aklyon]

Sure, why not.

[Skyrunner]

Calvinball! What is it exactly though?

[Aklyon]

Calvinball! What is it exactly though?

Exactly.

Or if you were asking for the Tacticus definition, I shall defer to the Hall of Legends in the upper boards:

The Complete Rules of Tacticus, New Expanded Abridged Revised Pantshelm Edition, cannot all exist in the same space, or else odd quantum-mechanical effects will result in the removal of all dwarven beards in that space. We wouldn't want that, now would we? Of course, that doesn't preclude a small amount of informal organization in which to experience the game, such as "unless the Complete Rules of Tacticus, New Expanded Revised Pantshelm Edition, instruct otherwise, the starter of the game is the one who keeps track of what the hell is going on for everyone else's benefit" or "once the starter of the game informs everyone what the hell went on the previous turn or other period of time-space-dwarfdom specified in the Complete Rules of Tacticus, New Expanded Revised Pantshelm Edition, everything else going on prior to that is what the hell is going on the next turn or other period of time-space-dwarfdom". Of course, as seasoned Tacticus veterans, we know that the former is implied via Enid Butterclasped's Interpretation of rule 107.908.1 Section E, subtitled "Ordering of Events - Game Information - Periods of Required Drinking - The Score and Its Relation to Hoary Marmots", while the latter clearly follows from Appendix D-2 Section 77B, "Time Flows Forward, Unless It Flows Backwards Or Sideways & Considerations on Special Temporal Conditions Both Alcohol-Induced And Not". Sure, there is some debate regarding Enid Butterclasped's Interpretation and its ramifications on interior antman movements - heck, I think we all disagree with her stance that brewing occurs before the second subsidiary non-underground event phase - but her general thoughts seem logically sound. "

[Skyrunner]

Good, then I throw a steel ball at you.

[Aklyon]

Good, then I throw a steel ball at you.

Was it or was it not a monster? if it was it should be a flattened steel disk.

I shall throw the steel object at the Catapult turtle after catching it.

[Skyrunner]

The flattened steel disk hits the Catapult turtle with 1d20 damage times zero plus 30. The Catapult turtle has 50 x lim->infinity (0.5)^x HP, by the way.

[Aklyon]

Its HP drops to 247.542653432 once I bring a POW block into the region, though.

[Furtuka]

I calmly walk in and punch it in the face with a X10 damage bonus for doing so in a gentlemanly manner

[UltraValican]

I'm game
My slime calvary appear on the edge of the map and perpare to charge your catapultFurturka.

[Skyrunner]

I activate my PI CARD, instantly setting all of your stats to

Spoiler: BIG NUMBER (click to show/hide)

3.
1415926535897932384626433832795028841971693993751058209 7494459230781640628620899862803482534211706798214808651 3282306647093844609550582231725359408128481117450284102 7019385211055596446229489549303819644288109756659334461 2847564823378678316527120190914564856692346034861045432 6648213393607260249141273724587006606315588174881520920 9628292540917153643678925903600113305305488204665213841 4695194151160943305727036575959195309218611738193261179 3105118548074462379962749567351885752724891227938183011 9491298336733624406566430860213949463952247371907021798 6094370277053921717629317675238467481846766940513200056 8127145263560827785771342757789609173637178721468440901 2249534301465495853710507922796892589235420199561121290 2196086403441815981362977477130996051870721134999999837 2978049951059731732816096318595024459455346908302642522 3082533446850352619311881710100031378387528865875332083 8142061717766914730359825349042875546873115956286388235 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!!!

I'm game
My slime calvary appear on the edge of the map and perpare to charge your catapultFurturka.

Did I mention slime calvary follow a radial map

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

when charging?

[DinosaurusRex_x]

I spawn as a zombie dinosaur and infect-bite Furtuka.

[UltraValican]

My mindless slimes are immune to your "math", and continue their charge.

[Skyrunner]

My mindless slimes are immune to your "math", and continue their charge.

Did I mention slime calvary follow a radial map

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

when charging?

[UltraValican]

Curses! I summon a platoon of PAINIS CUPCAKES TO EAT YOU!!!!