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[Loud Whispers]

ERm....

SUCCESSFUL TRAIN CRASH

[krenshala]

Try to say that to a friend of mine, whose only weapon is his shield No but seriously, I can take nearly any amount of damage I want if I block. Jst keep the mages away from me...

*SUCCESFUL DERAIL*

My militia captain killed a badger man by smashing its skull with a +pine shield+.  If I gave him that artifact gold brestplate it might slow him down enough that the rest of the militia members could keep up with him.  I think he moves four tiles for everyone else's three, so he out runs them in short order.

[Oliolli]

I think he moves four tiles for everyone else's three, so he out runs them in short order.

VAMPIRE! BRING ME THE WOODEN STAKES!

[krenshala]

I think he moves four tiles for everyone else's three, so he out runs them in short order.

VAMPIRE! BRING ME THE WOODEN STAKES!

Actually, that was my first thought; "Oh, gods! I've put a vampire in charge of my militia!", followed rapidly by, "Wait ... I'm running 0.31.25 ... nevermind."
*krenshala has been depressed lately.  his militia commander wasn't actually a vampire.  he admired his own fortress lately. he enjoyed a good meal recently.*

[Nan]

I got a platinum mail shirt once. I gave it to my militia commander. Surely the sheer bling factor surpasses the (lack of) utility.

[Eoganachta]

I got a platinum mail shirt once. I gave it to my militia commander. Surely the sheer bling factor surpasses the (lack of) utility.

I keep getting a spoilerite artefact breastplate from a previous fort engraved on my walls. It's like the game is trolling me to try it again.

[Wannazzaki]

My fort kept making engravings of a spoilertanium warhammer.

The current one has made thousands of masterwork engravings of the same fight between a named lynx being killed by a named elephant. As in, 5 out of 6 are this particular reproduction. Pain in the ARSE

[Callista]

At least you get fights. Mine keep engraving circles and stars and clouds and similarly boring stuff, unless they're engraving yet another reproduction of the founding of the fort.

[Oliolli]

One fort I had had 2/3 engravings of a Titan killing stuff. I still remember the name: Slenshi Submergedcaves the Pristine Lobster-Den. About half of those engravings were about Slenshi killing a certain human.

When i found out through legends that Slenshi lived in the same area as my fort was, I got scared. (It was one of my earliest forts)

[keyreper]

Soak it in lava and have a dwarf wear it, FLAMIN DWARF

[UristMcHuman]

an artifact gold warhammer...

I thought somebody got a lucky artifact platinum warhammer... Which is way, way, way, WAY heavier than gold.

[SirAaronIII]

Sort of related, how's billon for a mail shirt? Crappy, or really crappy?

[Oliolli]

an artifact gold warhammer...

I thought somebody got a lucky artifact platinum warhammer... Which is way, way, way, WAY heavier than gold.

I know, Prideunited. The thing is, someone said that gold and silver are poor weapon/armor materials, so I had to fix that. I think I'd give 12½ legendary weaponsmiths and 2 3/4 legendary armorsmiths for one 

[Mitchewawa]

My fort kept making engravings of a spoilertanium warhammer.

The current one has made thousands of masterwork engravings of the same fight between a named lynx being killed by a named elephant. As in, 5 out of 6 are this particular reproduction. Pain in the ARSE

Those are some pretty dwarfy engravings dude.
- You've got a homage to dwarven stupidity.
- You've got elephants trampling a cat.

I'm happy with wayward engravings of mayors sobbing like a bitch for getting un-elected!

[Madventurer]

"Train to Goldenartifactsburg has been derailed and is now headed for Engravington."