I recently came into ownership of a very interesting creature. this is no giant of bronze, no seven headed or fire breathing lizard, nor is it a huge creature with two heads, one eye, hairy with the head of a bull, or just of unusual size. I have become the proud(?) owner, of an elven princess. while I would know what to do with the prior mentioned critters, I am at a complete loss as to what to do with this one. should I trade her away to the goblins? they are certainly eager to take away the other creatures I give them. should I put her cage in the great dining hall and force her to dance for the citizens entertainment?
basically what happened is this, my fort had no enemies. even the goblins were peaceful trading partners (who sent new diplomats to my fort a lot because apparently, the goblin leaders kept getting killed.) so, out of boredom and not wanting to resort to other types of fun that I know I could not stand up to, I decided to start some shit with another race. humans? no, the humans are good people who provide me with booze and fish. the goblins? that would be the obvious choice, but something in my head said no. the goblins dont seem to bring mush to the table in terms of trade, but they do bring in a bit of exotic foods and hides. the elves? why not, I hate goddamn elves. uppity bastards always telling me what to do with my trees, telling me my people are uncouth barbarians. hypocritical bastards. fine, the elves it is. I butchered a few of their caravans, seized goods, and generally acted the fool. and so begins a glorious war. war where I am losing almost nothing to these panzies. one bright spring day, a large force of elven archers moves is spotted south of the fort, right up against the wall, so I order my troops out into the courtyard to fight them and the general riff-raff into the dining hall to weather the admittedly minor storm. the elves round the bend into my trap hall where they clash with my militia. only two elves and a camel escape the fray, one dies of blood loss, but the other and his mount manage to escape with minor injuries. another force is spotted just as im ordering my militia to stand down. again they clash and again they succeed in defeating my foes. now It must be said that I have captured quite a few elves. about seven live elves, and one who died when he fell into his cage. after inspecting my unit list, I find that one of these elven captives is a member of the nobility. oh joy. so currently I have this elf maiden, by the name of "Obe Elanaametha" set up for display between a cyclops and a giant eagle.
and now we come to the point of the whole story, the "TL'DR" if you will. what should I do with her? what would you do with her? I dont want to just throw her into magma, or crush her under a cave in. I want something that is long, drawn out, how do you say... entertaining? also, anybody else ever get any interesting nobles caught in cages or met/defeated in battle?
Author
Topic: A most curious acquisition (Read 6868 times)