Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: 1 ... 11 12 [13] 14 15 ... 18

Author Topic: Circle of Magi I:T.R.o.M.;Chapter 3: Once a Saint ...  (Read 27426 times)

adwarf

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Circle of Magi I: T.R.o.M.; Chapter 1, Part 2.5: So, This Is Death ...
« Reply #180 on: January 01, 2012, 07:04:19 am »

You watch the black egg warily searching for any motion as you reply to the being "I would give a millenia of research. The energy to move a hundred thousand mountains from practice and effort. But only at the pace of a Human. To make for myself what I can by my own ends, and by my ends only. I would not sacrifice my vision. I would not make a tribute of my mind. My heart, my soul, none shall be traded. I would not sacrifice anything, but I would instead gain my own power through my will, for which by that alone I could achieve greater than anything anyone could possibly give me." His laughter fills your mind, and you fill something slip out of it, you feel you might have once knew what this was, but now it seemed a vague shadow of something that was.

"You are mistaken, you think of yourself as something you are not. A human, you are no such thing, maybe you once were human, but you haven't been such a being for a long time. In time you will learn, but first you must survive against this darkness. I have taken from you your magic, I have taken your power now what is it you shall do? Will you die? Will your mind be crushed?" His laughter fills the air once again, but this time you feel it is a much colder laugh condemning you to your course.

Across the room the egg begins to shake violently, and cracks begin to appear across the egg's surface, though it does not break despite the seemingly fragile remains of the shell. Before you a pole of black stone rises from the ground, and floats up into the air until it lies horizontal in front of your eyes. "Take it, and will it into to the shape you wish." You reach out your hand, and grasp the stone rod with your hand, you focus your mind on it, and it begins to melt, and reform before your eyes, but into what?

Spoiler: Note (click to show/hide)
Logged

EveryZig

  • Bay Watcher
  • Adequate Liar
    • View Profile
Re: Circle of Magi I: T.R.o.M.; Chapter 1, Part 2.5: So, This Is Death ...
« Reply #181 on: January 01, 2012, 11:40:59 am »

I vote for either a shortsword or a spear. Probably the shortsword, because with a spear you want some backup for close quarters, like short ranged magic or, well, a shortsword.
Logged
Soaplent green is goblins!

ragnarok97071

  • Bay Watcher
  • /人 ◕ ‿‿ ◕人\
    • View Profile
Re: Circle of Magi I: T.R.o.M.; Chapter 1, Part 2.5: So, This Is Death ...
« Reply #182 on: January 01, 2012, 11:49:42 am »

No... we are aiming, in a way, to be an avatar of living death.

No weapon for us but a scythe.

preferably one with a chainsaw blade, but that's just me.
Logged
Quote from: Wing, via Discord
I want a coat that doesn't make me look like a rear admiral from the East India Company

Nirur Torir

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Circle of Magi I: T.R.o.M.; Chapter 1, Part 2.5: So, This Is Death ...
« Reply #183 on: January 01, 2012, 01:35:57 pm »

A kite shield designed to look like a book. The right edge is quite sharp.

Through superior knowledge, we protect ourselves. Our world (or at least what the world should be). We must learn until nothing can defeat us. Only then will we be powerful enough to achieve our goals. Yet power is double-edged: There will always be those who envy or fear us for who we are, and seek to cut us down.
Logged

ragnarok97071

  • Bay Watcher
  • /人 ◕ ‿‿ ◕人\
    • View Profile
Re: Circle of Magi I: T.R.o.M.; Chapter 1, Part 2.5: So, This Is Death ...
« Reply #184 on: January 01, 2012, 02:43:03 pm »

...

Better idea.

Form? What is form? something we apply though our perception of a thing.

Form is an illusion.

Its form shall be a Shifter Blade, able to become any weapon we desire, and many other things besides.
Logged
Quote from: Wing, via Discord
I want a coat that doesn't make me look like a rear admiral from the East India Company

adwarf

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Circle of Magi I: T.R.o.M.; Chapter 1: The Start of a Truth ...
« Reply #185 on: January 01, 2012, 09:51:21 pm »

A burst of blue light pulses from your hand, and through the melting stone. Suddenly it flits from a sword, to a spear, and to a scythe then it suddenly breaks apart, and becomes a spear, and a sword. You grasp both of them in your hands, and you feel something flow through your body, and become one with it. The egg shatters, and a massive wall of shadows explodes from its center, as it rushes forth you feel it impact your chest, and you are thrown back against the stone wall. Your vision momentarily blurs, and all you can see is flecks of light, and spots of black everywhere.

Your vision slowly return, and as you stand up, and look towards the egg you find a mirror image of yourself made out of pure shadow, though from its back sprouts four wings. You can feel its aura as it pushes you to your knees, and you struggle against the overwhelming presence of darkness. Your breathing becomes hard, and it begins to feel as if the aura itself is trying to strangle you. Just as your vision begins to darken you feel an intense burning on your back, and you topple forward onto the ground, but the aura's presence disappears, as you look up the beast still stands there, but for some reason its aura has no effect on you.

You push your self up from the ground, and the weapons still clutched in your hand fall to the ground, and turn into a silver liquid before becoming a massive blade. The blade is made of a pure white metal, and it seems to be made of one solid chunk of material, throughout it are holes, and deep rivets, but they seem to have naturally formed. As you reach your hand out for the pain you feel it stop on something, and you are thrown up, and back. Slamming into the wall you hear the stone shatter, and your vision turns red as you begin to plummet back to the ground. Your vision turns blood red as you slam against the ground, and you can hear numerous cracking, and tearing sounds come from your body.

You try to stand up, but the pain is to great, and you feel your clothes begin to grow heavy. As you look at them you find them slowly being soaked in your blood. You feel a kick to your side, and you go flying across the room smashing into the wall, and sending chunks of stone flying around you. You watch as your shadow self grows closer, and as it draws near the burning sensation returns, this time you see shackles, and chains appear on you. As they take form a white light begins to radiate from them, and the stone around you begins to crack while a pool of pure white forms in the middle of the circle. From the circle a figure rises up, the figure looks to be human, but as you watch you notice a tail, and two wings on his back, the wings are wrapped in chains, and seem to disappear into thin air.

Within moments the being is beside you, and your vision begins to fade. You hear words coming from somewhere, but you can't make them out, and you hear the cloaked being talk to you once more "So be it for now you shall carry this darkness, but be wary. If this being every takes control of you, then you will kill everyone close to you." With that your vision fades, and the last thing you see is that white sword, and then you feel someone picking you up. With that you consciousness fades completely, and you are swallowed by a dreamless dark.

Chapter 1: The Start of a Truth ...: Ends


Well here we are at the end of Chapter 1, and I am quite surprised by the amount of stuff I have typed up for this Chapter as it was meant to be the shortest one. After this we only have about five updates before we begin the Exams which will be filled with combat, and trials for our character to overtake. I have several questions I wan to ask before we start the next Chapter.

1.) What was your favorite part of this chapter?
2.) Do you think I have improved since starting this?
3.) Are you finding this to be fun?
Logged

Dermonster

  • Bay Watcher
  • Break the world, see what falls out.
    • View Profile


1.) Not sure.
2.) Your spelling and punctuation use is still kinda terrible.
3.) Maybe? It seems like we just dove head first into grimdark.
Logged
I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

adwarf

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile

I don't even have a clue what Grimdark is, how did I write it o.O?
Logged

Dermonster

  • Bay Watcher
  • Break the world, see what falls out.
    • View Profile

A story that is grim and or dark.

There also seems to be a bit of railroading going on here.
Logged
I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

adwarf

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile

A story that is grim and or dark.

There also seems to be a bit of railroading going on here.

That ends soon this is just giving parts of the story (I had to do some railroading to get the story introduced)
Logged

Dermonster

  • Bay Watcher
  • Break the world, see what falls out.
    • View Profile

Seriously, look up on how to use the comma. This isn't an insult, this is good advice and you should take it.
Logged
I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

adwarf

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile

It seems I have been leaving out the commas before quotation marks :\ I'll read up the rules for commas a couple of times to get them in my head.
Logged

EveryZig

  • Bay Watcher
  • Adequate Liar
    • View Profile

I am confused by what happened in the latest post. My best guess is that our shadow-self defeated us with telekinesis, but then we somehow summoned demon guy, who caused us to become only a little bit possessed. Is that correct?
Logged
Soaplent green is goblins!

adwarf

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile

Nope you shadow self was physically hitting you, when you tried to grab the white sword she beat the crap out of ya, and then some demon appeared. After that you blacked out
Logged

EveryZig

  • Bay Watcher
  • Adequate Liar
    • View Profile

Oh. It wasn't very clear what shadowself was hitting us with. In the future I would like that to be mentioned at least sometimes (unless our character doesn't know), as that can be useful information both for decision making and for immersion.
Logged
Soaplent green is goblins!
Pages: 1 ... 11 12 [13] 14 15 ... 18