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[Loud Whispers]

Plains titan shows up, mobs my uber military, uber military kill it no prob, but half a dozen are now covered in poison. Swell up like balloons, but since I have a team of legendary wound dressers, diagnosticians and what-not on standby 24/felsite, I end up with a new squad of blind legendary Guardswarves, a warrior-mayor and I find out that these blind dwarves follow my orders down to the bone. Stopped them from blocking and parrying a lot though... Still, being dwarves, they blindly hacked everything that moved to pieces.

YAAAAAY REVERSE DEVASTATION!!!!

[WolfeyS]

Blind soldiers.   

[Loud Whispers]

Blind soldiers.   

Was like having a blade storm that actually listened to my commands. After that, I've deliberately sought after Titans that syndromed the crap out of my dwarves.

[WolfeyS]

So the formula:

Dorfs - Eyes = Dorfs that listen to commands?

...

Prepare the dabbling eye surgeon.

[Loud Whispers]

So the formula:

Dorfs - Eyes = Dorfs that listen to commands?

...

Prepare the dabbling eye surgeon.

"So we're just going to take out yeh eyes, and replace em with this 'ere adamantine plates..."

"Hey doc, you sure you should do this when you don't have ey-AIAIAIIeAAEAAeAAAAAAA

[WolfeyS]

Why not replace their whole face with adamantine.  Hell, why not just get legendary +5 surgeons and replace their SKIN with adamantine, graft it on with magma!

[Duuvian]

Why not replace their whole face with adamantine.  Hell, why not just get legendary +5 surgeons and replace their SKIN with adamantine, graft it on with magma!

Yeah, that would be cool once Toady puts magic in. I could see me trying to get a dwarf to do that to another dwarf.

[Reudh]

Skin of adamantine, heart of magma? Sounds like the Spawn of Holistic in Syrupleaf.

Anyway, my worst FB devastation was in my latest fort, Zalisiden or Wardpaddle.

First, Nubpo came up and made everyone paralysed with his venomous blood. A baby crawled through the blood and instantly died from suffocation. The older dwarves with clothing merely had paralysed feet. Once Nubpo's blood had been more or less cleaned off, a goblin siege showed up. This was alright. Nubpo's blood began to paralyse and drowse the goblins which helped me with the siege.

Then, Ab the Singed Zeal with deadly dust came right up to the main meeting area and flung it everywhere, knocking everyone unconscious. Ab then systematically killed every unconscious dwarf with a single strike in a matter of seconds, including the second strongest dwarf in the fort: Thob Delightcrystals the Mournful Tragedy of Tours... Zaneg ended it shortly after, but thirty dwarves died.

Another FB- a giraffe with deadly blood killed no-one but two recruits and Zaneg Meetingcrypts the Blockaded Recluse of Justice were infected with rot. Zaneg had the rotten fingers and tissue on her feet, as well as a rotten stomach. Zaneg had the fingers removed and some of the tissue removed and was alright.

A siege came and obliterated the weakened fort... Oh dear. These three FBs plus two sieges managed to finally finish off our army of four.

[King DZA]

Hm, you seem to reference Zalisiden quite a lot, I've noticed. Have you ever written a full story about it? My somewhat lazy search attempt was only able to come up with "The Fall of Zalisiden", which appears to have never been completed.  The seemingly constant stream of bad luck it endured would make it very intriguing to read about.

[Eric Blank]

Read: Battlefailed, Last turn; Andreus III, 8-11.


I haven't had the good luck to meet a nasty beast. I suppose the most horrifying encounter I've had was on one of my first 31.0x forts, in which a gigantic sauropod spewing numbing gases assaulted my utterly unprepared fortress. The numbing extract actually saved lives since the recruitslegendary wrestlers didn't pass out from pain while it was disembowling them, which prevented it getting cheap headshots on unconscious victims and permited the dorfs to eventually kill it. Quite a few losses, though, and many crippling injuries that were never treated. (Starving to death because they wouldn't go/be taken to a hospital. The health care bugs in previous versions were pretty nasty.)

It was immediately followed by multiple werewolf incursions, taking as many lives and more, then by a skeletal dragon that slaughtered anything on the surface and breathed fire down a passageway of lignite/coal, which resulted in a few dwarves bleeding to death from melting fat. At that point I sealed the fort and eventually got bored to death of not being able to defend the fortress from shit, and abandoned/let the dragon in. Terrifying tundra/mountains FTW.

[Jassam]

Well this was my first fortress, I can't even remember the name anymore, and I had just gotten the hang of food/booze production and trading. Weapons and armor were whatever I could scavenge from caravans and the occasional ambush, but still I could hold off the goblins just fine. So what I'm left with is a couple ragtag squads of ill equipped dwarves with everything to prove and nothing to loseBut their lives. This was my first mistake.

Fast forward a year later. The fort is going slow, as I'm still new and unsure of what lies below, and I just hit the first cavern layer. All I can see down their is a few crundles and the occasional trogg so I just forget about it and continue digging elsewhere. This was my second mistake.

A few months later and after figuring out that I can infact use charcoal to smelt ore and such, I get a message from the caverns. A forgotten beast has come, its a pterodactyl with four wings (no dust or blood to worry about). It flies in through the uncovered hole into the first cavern and I send in the military.

They are quickly slaughtered despite my PRO copper armor that I just made. So I get a 'genius' idea, I decide to recruit everyone I can in the fort and send them in to clobber the thing.

This goes as well as it sounds. After seeing nearly everyone get crushed, I decide to just let the magic happen and unrecruit everyone. While the now surnamed beast chases the last few survivors a lone weaver goes crazy and begins strangling a child in some forgotten corridor of the dorm level. Before the child can suffocate, the beast finally finds them and ends both his pain and his attackers insanity.

And so ends the first fort of Jassam.

There was also an incident within the walls of a different fort, ISHEMAS "The UltraCave" with a deadly dust attack where I had to sacrifice my entire hospital area, but that's a tale for a different day.

[Reudh]

Ha, I'd forgotten about the fall of zalisiden! Lol, oops. I should finish that.

[Lpfn1822]

I had a pretty great fort running. Built some good defensive walls, started to expand them, when a caravan showed up. Sweet! Then came the Titan, some sort of tough badass. I sent my dwarves out to fight him.
Right as they got outside, 3 ambushes showed up.
The combination of the enemies slaughtered my military (Which included a few swordmasters and axelords!).
Then the titan killed all the goblins. He wasn't even wounded.
The slaughtered military set off a tantrum spiral. They attacked the caravan, and the guards killed a good amount of my guys before getting killed Urist McWoodcutter, who came with a steel axe.
The tantrum spiral continued, so I just decided to open the gates and let the titan in.
As soon as he got in, guess what happens?
Urist McWoodcutter one-shots him. My axelords and swordmasters with steel weapons couldn't scratch him, the goblins couldn't leave a mark. But one freaking woodcutter with a steel axe just kills him.
Then the tantrum spiral continued so I just abandoned the fortress.
Losing is fun.

[Eric Blank]

That's a rather crushing defeat... I've always felt that the citizens of other civs and caravan guards have some sort of hidden advantage over the dwarves you can control, no matter how skilled or well-equipped the dwarves are. It just doesn't seem to be possible for things to go your way...

I just now had a run-in with another forgotten beast of ill repute. A newt with deadly blood. I failed to keep it in the caverns despite it being slowed down by leg inuries or whatnot from it's battle with an olm man tribe, but I sealed it in a stairwell when it stopped to admire a floor grate for several hours. My miners dug out a cave-in trap overhead (It's not that effective to just send in the troops for a beast with deadly blood) and I sent one to set it off, feeling lazy and as if time was short for that floor grate and the trap would have to be scooted over to actually hit the beast. The bloody idiot decided to stand on the tile being dropped, so obviously he fell down the hole and died on impact with the cavern floor. So that makes us even, bloody newt.
The good news is it was just another nobody with little skill, and the only blood spilled was from that nobody exploding all over the bottom of the cavern lake, so I won't have to deal with the syndrome.

[gunnarig]

I havent really run many fortresses to the point where i enter the caves until recently.  But getting my first military in order wich i must say i was quite prowd of.a cyclops shows up. he kills a fisherdwarf unlucky enough to be close to him upon arrival. i send my military out to engage the beast having 5 axedwarfs and 3 marksdwarfs each assigned a wardog the first axedwarf manages to lucky shot his leg with a message of you struck the X leg tearing the muscle severing a motor nerve tearing a ligemen and a tendon then in the report the cyclops fell over. then the rest of the dwarfs kind of cut him into pieces from the legs working upwards. i suffered no casulties exept for the fisherdwarf. but the heroes of the battle were the wardogs one of them lashed on to his eyelid wich i found quite amuzing. and in the end the dogs were lashing onto the ongly limb the clops had left and swinging him around. i can picture a dog weighing 30kg to be swinging around a 8 ton cyclops .

As for megabeasts. a beast arrived it was a Lobster with two tails i wasnt worried since i thoght i had the caves sealed but all of a sudden i got a message that a Urist Mcspinner had been attacked by a megabeast i think the thing found its way in throgh my well since i had no grates in the channel below. i promtly sent my military to dispatch it and lost one guy due to his arm being clipped off. with the graphics pack i have the lobster looked like a green cat .

Then A second beast arrives wich is made from Flux stone or something similar. its a Giant flying dinosour phegosourid or something but i wanted to try to kill it since ive heard tales of beasts made out of stone materials being the badasses of the game. but as soon as i was ready to breach the caves close to the beast. it disapeered and hasnt been heard of since.

Well these are all my tales of FBs but reading this post i gotta say i think im preatty lucky on what has been handed to me.