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Author Topic: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.  (Read 11510 times)

+!!scientist!!+

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the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« on: November 29, 2011, 05:16:45 pm »
I was playing as your average adventurer in a world with the maximum number of titans possible, and so I wasn’t too surprised when I randomly came upon a shrine in the middle of the humble desert. The titan was, if memory serves (I can’t exactly look at the thing at the moment) a three eyed gopher in humanoid form with fire breath, but that is not important. What is important is that he grabbed me by several article of clothing and then released his grip on several of them. I thought he had let go of all of them but I was wrong, he still had a death grip on my ”rope reed fiber trousers.” The result was when I backed away I immediately lost possession of my pants. Embarrassed, but not defeated. I tried to stand up, but he knocked me back down and beat me to a pulp. This, I suppose is unremarkable... except for the weapon used:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Anyone else have any stories that can compare to a man being beaten to death with his own trousers by a giant gopher?
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Quote from: varnish on November 02, 2011, 12:29:57 pm
"what are all these shapes? Why are they moving around. What do they want from me?"

squeakyReaper

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #1 on: November 29, 2011, 05:28:38 pm »
My first encounter with a minotaur did not go well. His first victim was an off duty militiaman, who was fishing at the time. He knocked him cold with a punch, and took his peacock leather flask. Beat my entire fortress to death with it. Bastard still had it when I went to fight him in Adventure Mode.
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UristMcHuman

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #2 on: November 29, 2011, 06:14:38 pm »
One of my own adventurers (and several of his companions) were beaten to death with a rope reed shoe.
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Argonnek

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2011, 06:31:55 pm »
I once beat some bandits to death with a piece of string.
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Broseph Stalin

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #4 on: December 02, 2011, 01:56:50 pm »
I like to stab somebody, fill a waterskin with their blood, and beat them to death with the blood.
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Alizarin

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #5 on: December 03, 2011, 06:47:38 pm »
The most common items I've been beaten to death with are my backpack and my sock.
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The Bull headbutt's the Minotaur in the buttocks, bruising the muscle and shattering the lower spine's bone and tearing the nervous tissue through the cow leather trousers!
The Minotaur slams into an obstacle!
http://cdn-www.i-am-bored.com/media/japanbullart.jpg

zubb2

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #6 on: December 03, 2011, 06:54:49 pm »
Anyone else have any stories that can compare to a man being beaten to death with his own trousers by a giant gopher?

Siged!
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(Anyone else have any stories that can compare to a man being beaten to death with his own trousers by a giant gopher?)
(when goblins showed up, I mumbled "Smithers! Release the hounds!" and had the lever pulled.)

Therolyn

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #7 on: December 06, 2011, 12:22:55 pm »
Not a story, in fact not even something that occurred in adventure mode, however despite that you'll find its very much on topic.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Edit: Forgot Spoiler tags
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Akura

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #8 on: December 06, 2011, 01:42:51 pm »
Quote from: +!!scientist!!+ on November 29, 2011, 05:16:45 pm
Anyone else have any stories that can compare to a man being beaten to death with his own trousers by a giant gopher?
Aside from the story of a bronze colossus being decapitated with a thrown live fluffy wambler, no, I can't say that I have.
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Quote
They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard.
Quote from: Vector on March 17, 2011, 11:50:36 pm
... Yes, the hugs are for everyone.  No stabbing, though.  Just hugs.

+!!scientist!!+

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #9 on: December 07, 2011, 08:55:23 am »
Quote from: zubb2 on December 03, 2011, 06:54:49 pm
Siged!

Wow, only four posts and I've already been sigged! I wonder if that's a record...

Anyways, keep the stories coming because so far they have been hilarious!
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Quote from: varnish on November 02, 2011, 12:29:57 pm
"what are all these shapes? Why are they moving around. What do they want from me?"

Tiruin

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #10 on: December 07, 2011, 11:03:29 pm »
This was like one of the things that the legendary dwarves used in the fortresses long ago. In the Legends. Instead of weapons, they used misc. objects. Countless battles were won by dwarves slinging leather backpacks and metal greaves at their enemies, bashing them for far longer than anyone has ever seen.

Also, unarmed person + wrestling grabs and options + random RNG = hello new weapons and armor!

Grab anything off anyone, but not neutrals or friendlies or they will kill you.
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Ross Vernal

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #11 on: December 08, 2011, 01:47:24 am »
http://img13.imageshack.us/img13/4167/lolownedk.jpg

I had a pet dinosaur in a dodge-em deathtrap. It was fond of sweet sweet tunic murder.
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Doctor Blood

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #12 on: December 08, 2011, 03:47:17 am »
Quote from: squeakyReaper on November 29, 2011, 05:28:38 pm
My first encounter with a minotaur did not go well. His first victim was an off duty militiaman, who was fishing at the time. He knocked him cold with a punch, and took his peacock leather flask. Beat my entire fortress to death with it. Bastard still had it when I went to fight him in Adventure Mode.
I feel the pain of your fortress members. Did you win the fight in adventure mode? Haha
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Jumping into a waterfall to get water is Spectacular.

Knarfle

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #13 on: December 15, 2011, 08:04:28 pm »
I've strangled people with their own underwear.
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What do you get when a Rhesus monkey steps on a weapons trap loaded with maximum adamantine blades?

Rhesus Pieces!

bukitodinos

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Re: the AI uses wierd weapons sometimes.
« Reply #14 on: December 21, 2011, 01:12:05 pm »
hell my guy got his tongue ripped out and got a broken arm with it, then he got it back and decapitated a boogy
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Quote from: Splint on June 02, 2012, 11:57:47 pm
I mean for the love of god! There's hair trying to kill a dog!
Quote from: darklord92 on July 09, 2012, 02:32:08 pm
back to professional martinis with bukitodinos!
---
Put the flag in the martini and were done!
siggy!
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