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[ThatAussieGuy]

There in lies the problem: It's difficult to make hardened players say that now.

I have plans for an ocean-side fortress that should prove interesting, if a few of my dorfineering theories prove correct

[Splint]

Which they might not resulting more in laughter as people try to figure out how that mechanic was spitted through both ends of his digestive tracked with a pond grabber and a chunk of gabbro and the miners killed by horizontal axels they weren't even near.

[Eric Blank]

Which they might not resulting more in laughter as people try to figure out how that mechanic was spitted through both ends of his digestive tracked with a pond grabber and a chunk of gabbro and the miners killed by horizontal axels they weren't even near.

Spitted through both ends of his digestive tract with a pond grabber and a chunk of gabbro. What does that even mean?

[Oliolli]

*Contest over who has done the most insane things*

Only in Bay 12.

[Splint]

Which they might not resulting more in laughter as people try to figure out how that mechanic was spitted through both ends of his digestive tracked with a pond grabber and a chunk of gabbro and the miners killed by horizontal axels they weren't even near.

Spitted through both ends of his digestive tract with a pond grabber and a chunk of gabbro. What does that even mean?

What do you think it means? He got run through vertically with a peice of rock and a quadropus. Don't ask me how that works though.

[Splint]

The following is a blood spattered Journal, of Splint Morulerib a survivor of the Battle of Swordthunders.
It is bound in Alpaca leather with pages of rendered quarry bush leaf. The spine is adorned with bands of granite. The pages are worn and spattered with blood and other unpleasent goop in places, more from the user's hands being forearm deep in all manner of muck. Inside the cover is the words WHYHAVEYOUABANDONEDUS squeased over every available space, speaking possibly of the general mental instability of the former owner.

16th Felsite, 107.

I've decided to begin keeping a journal, since this place was dropped in my lap.  The last overseer said he'd had enouh and needed a break from running this clusterfuck. Up until now things have been an endless sea of that odd fellow Eric Blank churning out masterworks and people (myself included) complaining that things keep disappearing. Some family and thier friends arrived outside a couple weeks ago, though I'm positive they think we're all dead since I refused to let them in for our own safty. From what I gather, they're building a camp topside on the top of the mountain, arming themselves, building shelter and trying to tidy up the mess up there.

Good luck to them.

17th Felsite, 107.

I was tossing rocks out the doors when I saw elves on the horizon. I wouldn't be having any of that bullshit, much as I'd like them to take some of this crap laying about. Hell, I'd welcome a damned horde of thives if they took all the refuse laying outside. I'd give them a damned medal!

Almost as if on cue, some pikegoblins burted out of the mountains of junk and swarmed them. it ended badly. Caught a glimps of the poor sods topside grabbing weapons and armor beforew I locked us in. No sense in getting us all killed helping the useless simps. Me and a few other fellows have decided to join  the milita, though when we'll have time to train I have no idea since we need more of this crap cleared away.

And why do we have so many damned braclets and earrings!? WHAT THE HELL KIND OF A MORON MAKES NEW ONES WHEN WE HAVE MOUNTAINS OF THEM ALREADY!!!!? -The writing degrades here into unintelligible chicken scratch, likely some triage of horrible obscenities.-

-----
Proper update of the fight to come at some point tonight.

[ThatAussieGuy]

You'd think a fortress of mugs would have made you immune to this kind of madness, Splint.

[Splint]

Honestly it wasn't that much, but my peasent flew off the handel at seeing the stock records. And I should really have Eric stop making... Anything. We have enough useless garbage laying around as it is.

[Eric Blank]

What? What am I making? Mugs? Not masterwork dining tables or cabinets?

[Splint]

Doesn't matter what you're making. We already have too much crap as it is.

[Mr Frog]

Maybe if we put Spearbreakers's mugs and Swordthunders's earrings in a room together they'll destroy each other for us. Along with everything else in a 20-mile radius.

[Splint]

I'll do a proeper story version if I'm still functioning after work tomorrow, but in short, the evles got slaughtered, a snatcher was punched to death by one of the surface dwellers, and now both sides are more or less staring menacingly at eachother from several undred feet away.

@ Mr Frog - We can dream....

[ThatAussieGuy]

Maybe if we put Spearbreakers's mugs and Swordthunders's earrings in a room together they'll destroy each other for us. Along with everything else in a 20-mile radius.

The more you taunt Swordthunders, the more of it's innate horrors will be laid bare to you   

Though I heartily agree that the combined quantity of Spearbreakers and Swordthunders bric-a-brak would collapse in on itself like a dying star. 

[rridgway]

Out of curiosity, did anyone find my secret message?

[ThatAussieGuy]

Iiii guess not.  We found Oliolli's though.  Splint, is the fort still alive?